What is cyberbullying?
Bullying is a lot more common than some people think and can happen at school, at home, on the sporting field or at work. Over the past two decades, a particularly disturbing form of bullying has emerged.
With the proliferation of new, instant and global ways to communicate, the phenomenon known as cyberbullying is gaining popularity as a malicious way to cause hurt and humiliation.
Cyberbullies use email, online chat rooms, mobile phones, online discussion groups, web pages, instant messaging services such as MSN Messenger and social networking sites like Myspace and Facebook to target their victims.
A Queensland University of Technology study into the prevalence of cyberbullying showed that almost one-third of girls aged 11 to 19 had been subjected to bullying. Of those, half said they had been bullied online or via a mobile phone.
Of even more concern, usually cyberbullies were not the same children who bullied face-to-face, with almost three-quarters (70 per cent) saying they did not bully others in person.[1]
One of the terrible aspects of cyberbullying is that because it can allow a person to be fairly anonymous, some people who would not otherwise carry out this unacceptable behaviour feel they can get away with it.
Cyberbullies use methods such as:
- texting derogatory messages on mobile phones, with students showing the message to others before sending it to the target
- sending threatening emails
- making negative comments on social networking sites
- forwarding a confidential email to all address book contacts
- ganging up and bombarding the person with 'flame' (defamatory) emails
- setting up web sites designed to malign the target.
People are often bullied because they are seen as being 'different', but in reality, just about anything can be used as a reason for bullying.
Being bullied can cause stress, feelings of intimidation and even physical injury. People who are bullied often feel that they are all alone and think there is nothing they can do to stop it. Ongoing bullying can lower a person's self-esteem and lead to feelings of sadness, depression, anger and confusion.
Associate Professor Michael Baigent, a psychiatrist and Clinical Advisor to beyondblue says cyberbullying can be particularly hurtful and can lead to a serious mental health problem.
"The short term effects are very troublesome and can include anxiety symptoms, feelings of unhappiness and distress, physical symptoms and a desire to avoid going to school," he said. "If it goes on for a while, the person may well develop depression or an anxiety disorder. It can be very distressing because the person has a record of it that they can look at again and again and again," he said.
"It usually involves a much larger audience and can occur more often, even in the person's own home. It's harder for your peers to show that they don't support it as well. If it's happening face to face, other kids might discourage the bully and say 'look, cut it out' and walk away and don't involve themselves with it. When the bullying is online, the person being bullied only sees the ones that do support it."
Teenagers and young people are exposed to many triggers for depression and anxiety disorders, however, bullying presents a very high risk - particularly when there are a lot of other things going on their lives as well e.g. childhood abuse, struggling with school work, family history of mental illness and having parents who argue a lot.
What should I do if I'm being bullied?
Dr Baigent says: "If you are being bullied it is really important to keep reminding yourself that it's not your fault and that there is something you can do about the problem. You are entitled not to be bullied and it's your right to enjoy school and activities without people trying to make you feel bad. Take steps to put a stop to it now.
"The best place to start is to talk to people you trust - friends, family and teachers - about what is happening to you and to discuss ways of dealing with the problem.
"Talking to someone is really important if you feel unsafe or frightened, or if you don't have many friends. Asking for help or talking to someone about it is not being weak or 'giving in'. In fact it can take a lot of strength and courage.
If you are feeling very upset by it, it's also a good idea to consider counselling to make sure you're okay. You can talk to your school counsellor about it. It's important to do everything you can to put a stop to it because if the cyber bully is particularly nasty and persistent and a person lets it go on, in rare cases, it has lead to self-harm or suicide.
Dr Baigent says that self-harm or suicide should never be an option, no matter how bad things seem.
"Sometimes suicide is an impulsive act that is a direct result of bullying and not something that has been planned. We always want teens and young people to realise there may be problems that seem overwhelming, but you can always find good solutions to them, and suicide is not a cool solution to problems. It's a horrible and permanent outcome to something that can be solved and it causes enormous distress for those around you."
For more information and support on bullying:
Websites
Click here to download Youthbeyondblue fact sheet 20 on Bullying.
Click here to read advice from 17-year-old Girlfriend Magazine writer Tom Wood about cyberbullying.
What can parents do if their child is being bullied?
The covert nature of cyberbullying can make it difficult for parents to realise that their child may be a victim, so it's important to discuss cyberbullying and talk openly about the issues.
Dr Baigent says it is vital to find out as much information about the source of the bullying as soon as you become aware it is happening.
"Be sympathetic to your children, listen to them and encourage them to discuss it," he said. "Then it's really important to put steps into place to stop it continuing. You might wonder how you can do that, but if it's originating from school sources, talk to the school. Most have policies about bullying and they should be informed. The teachers should be informed and there should be the expectation that the school should take action to prevent it from continuing.
"It's important in a broader sense for the community including schools, teachers, and parents, to develop a zero tolerance to bullying so that this becomes part of the school philosophy. Then, even the students themselves will look out for it - they know it's wrong, so they don't do it."
At home, the measures to prevent cyberbullying might include restricting access to the internet and phone or monitoring use, depending on the age of your child.
"There are some tricky things you can do using the technology to prevent particular numbers or messages from particular people coming through," Dr Baigent said.
Finally, Dr Baigent has some advice for parents who suspect their kids might be engaging in cyberbullying.
"Firstly, stop them! Talk to them about the effects it will have on someone else and encourage them to develop a sense of empathy. If they persist, you need to take away the tools they're using to do it - that's your moral obligation."
[1] Campbell, Marilyn A (2005) Cyber bullying: An old problem in a new guise? Australian Journal of Guidance and Counselling 15(1):68-76.
