More than 200 people attended the beyondblue public meeting held in Ringwood, Melbourne, on 28 October 2005. They evening was an emotional one for many attendees - several commenting that just the act of talking openly about depression with others was a powerful experience. Speakers at the event included Olympic gold medallist John Konrads, who talked about how he manages bipolar disorder, beyondblue board member John McGrath and Deputy CEO Dr Nicole Highet.

An Olympian's private battle

John Konrads knows a secret: many people with depression hide their feelings and pretend they are fine. He knows this because it is exactly what the Olympic gold medallist did for many years, before finally being diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

"Like many, I suffered in silence. I kept my pain well hidden," Konrads says. And like many others with undiagnosed depressive illnesses, he turned to alcohol.

"A frequent companion of depression is alcohol... people are really self-medicating. But unfortunately this only makes the problem worse because alcohol is a depressant, and it also reduces the effectiveness of [antidepressant] medication."

"I almost gave up on the medication I was taking because it didn't seem to be helping, but when I went off the grog it worked marvellously. The alcohol could have prevented me finding the drug that has ended up helping me so much."

Now in a better place, with the aid of medication, regular Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, and a healthy understanding of his own condition, the 63-year-old is determined to speak out about his own experiences in the hope it will raise awareness and reduce the stigma of depression.

"It is a terrible thing that so many people with depression feel so ashamed and guilty. They feel guilty because they can't 'pull their socks up' and get on with life. They feel guilt about being a burden to their loved ones."

"This is the reason why being diagnosed is often a great relief for people with depression. They realise that it is not their fault, that they have a condition that requires intervention, just like diabetes or heart disease."

"It was a great relief for me to realise that the problem was chemicals in my brain not working correctly, and that it could be treated."

Konrads' advice to anyone who thinks they may have a depressive illness or related substance misuse disorders is to seek help.

"If you feel like your life is become unmanageable because of the way you are feeling or how much you are drinking, then it is time to get help."