Online forums

Before you can post or reply in these forums, please complete your profile

Complete your profile

Before you can post or reply in these forums, please join our online community.

Forum membership is open to anyone residing in Australia.

Join the online community Community rules Coping during the Coronavirus outbreak

Forums / Anxiety / The War and Ukraine … Strategies that can help

Topic: The War and Ukraine … Strategies that can help

  1. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    27 February 2022

    I have seen and heard so much that is going on with the war in Ukraine 🇺🇦

    My heart goes out to each and every one in Ukraine.

    Our minds can begin to spiral in a negative way which is sometimes fuelled by anxiety in regards to the war.

    When our thoughts begin to spiral…we can:

    Just allow the thoughts to be there and then allow them to float away when they come back still allow them to be there and float away….. try not to give them your attention.

    What we give attention to we give power to.

    When we have the thoughts we can put our attention on something positive in the present moment and not what’s going inside our minds.

    Focus on your breath, use your breath as an anchor this will help ground you.

    If we want to do something positive for Ukraine we can pray for them and direct our positive energy towards Ukraine in their time of need to help lift them.

    I believe that Ukraine are strong and very resilient people who would do anything to protect their country.

    Hold high hopes for Ukraine we are with you .💪❤️

    6 people found this helpful
  2. sbella02
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    sbella02 avatar
    253 posts
    27 February 2022 in reply to Petal22

    Petal22,

    Once again, you always have the most beautiful words for tough situations. This topic has given me so much anxiety, your post is really grounding.

    "What we give attention to, we give power to", what a powerful way of putting it, and very true too.

    I would like to second your message and send my love to the people of Ukraine, anyone with friends or relatives in Ukraine, and anybody else who may be affected by this current situation.

    All my well wishes, SB

    1 person found this helpful
  3. Doberman38
    Doberman38 avatar
    71 posts
    5 March 2022

    Something I need to know for myself, is how much and at what times should I devote to being informed about the situation? I don't want to shut myself off completely, but I dread that any news about it would just be worse than last time. If I got updates in the morning, I don't even have a chance to unwind before being plunged into awful reality; if in the afternoon, it would just dampen my prime 'me' time; if at night, I surely wouldn't be able to sleep. I don't know how to strike the right balance.

    I also want to get back to chatting with online friends from Europe and North America, but I can't bring myself to out of fear that they're all gonna be engulfed in it if things escalate. I even know someone who lives in Ukraine and I ironically am so worried for them that the prospect of contacting them just feels too overwhelming.

    I just really don't know to handle these kind of situations, and I'm sure the same goes with most at the moment. I'm no longer in full panic mode like I was the first few days, but the whole thing has still got its opressive grip over me. I would love to hear any helpful suggestions.

    1 person found this helpful
  4. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    5 March 2022 in reply to Doberman38

    Hi Doberman38,

    I understand it’s hard to find balance maybe just limit yourself now until you are feeling more at ease and maybe on a good day just expose yourself for a time you feel comfortable.

    When you do expose yourself and if you feel anxious try to turn your attention to something else in the present moment.

    Practice some deep breathing.

    We can’t control what is happening but we can always choose how we react to it.

    1 person found this helpful
  5. Doberman38
    Doberman38 avatar
    71 posts
    5 March 2022 in reply to Petal22
    Thanks very much, Petal. I'll certainly give it a go. :)
    1 person found this helpful
  6. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    16486 posts
    6 March 2022 in reply to Doberman38

    Hello Doberman, there comes a time when your curiosity and concern will overpower your other thoughts, but there may not be any way to contact them, this doesn't mean anything as the tele power may have been destroyed.

    I wish I could give you the best time to watch the news but I can't, because we could say don't watch the evening news, but you might only be wondering what's happening.

    My best.

    Geoff.

    2 people found this helpful
  7. fred4761
    fred4761 avatar
    128 posts
    7 March 2022

    Hi Doberman and everyone else,

    I am really struggling too with finding a balance between keeping informed and then going down the rabbit hole of obsessively refreshing the news websites to keep up to date on the latest news about the war. The past few days I find that so much of my time is spent worrying about what is going on in the world. I like the idea of focussing my positive energy and thoughts and prayers on Ukraine rather than trying to overthink things - which definitely isn't helping me at the moment!

    I have been trying to work out why I feel this need to know everything that is going on with the invasion. I do have friends in Russia who are struggling to understand what is happening and who have been suddenly cut off from the rest of the world. I know that I am worried for them. I also think that it is a control thing. A part of me somehow thinks that if I am informed about every single piece of news then somehow I can do something about it. Logically it doesn't make sense. My OCD likes to rear its ugly head in times like these. And just thinking about it now as I type, I feel like maybe if I feel bad enough it will somehow help the situation (which doesn't make sense either). I think that I feel guilty living my life and trying to be oblivious to what is going on in that part of the world when so many are suffering. I am not quite sure how to let go of that guilt though . . .

    1 person found this helpful
  8. Learn to Fly
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    Learn to Fly avatar
    342 posts
    7 March 2022 in reply to fred4761

    Hi fred4761,

    Welcome and thank you for sharing.
    I hope you don’t mind me saying but to me it doesn’t sound like you are being oblivious at all. You sound the opposite: caring, worrying about people at both ends of this war and trying to still lead a somehow normal life. I think there is a bit of guilt in all of us because suddenly we realise how lucky we are to live where we live and be safe. A very complex topic and no straight answer at hand.

    2 people found this helpful
  9. quirkywords
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    quirkywords avatar
    14741 posts
    7 March 2022 in reply to Petal22

    Thanks Petal for this post and to all those who have commented or read .

    I avoid things in news that upset me up I am often accused of burying my head in the sand.

    So there is a balance.

    I am all too aware of the suffering In Ukraine and many other countries, of people whose lives are full of struggle and suffering.

    I can feel for others without seeing every image or reading every article.

    2 people found this helpful
  10. Sophie_M
    Community Moderator
    • Works for beyondblue moderating these forums
    Sophie_M avatar
    6846 posts
    7 March 2022 in reply to fred4761
    Hi Fred4761

    Thanks so much for a brave post on how the world is feeling at the moment. OCD in times of such stress is incredibly hard. Self-care in moments such as this, it is really difficult to not feel some guilt when that self-care needs you to switch off and ignore for a while. 

    Always remember, there is little we can do to help the world and the people who need us most if we hit the wall completely ourselves. Please do take whatever steps you need to to remain well and healthy in these really trying times. Don't hesitate to reach out to us if you need the extra support right now. 

    Regards,

    Sophie M
    3 people found this helpful
  11. Doberman38
    Doberman38 avatar
    71 posts
    7 March 2022 in reply to fred4761

    Hi Fred.

    Something which has been working for me is to devote only a very small time of the day to updates and avoid looking any further for the rest of the day. If you do this enough it may break down the urge itself.

    I certainly can relate to that 'brooding about it will help' kind of mentality. We know full well it won't but we feel the urge to do so. I think this in some ways is the mind's way of trying to find an outlet for the great desire to help when one can't do much directly. Don't forget though, there ARE things you can do, through things like aid and charity organisations and the like. It might not seem like much, but participation in these things certainly CAN make a difference.

    My most heartfelt wishes go to you and to all the people of Ukraine and Russia at this trying time.

    Doberman~

    1 person found this helpful
  12. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    7 March 2022 in reply to fred4761

    Hi fred4761,

    I think Sophie M has really given some great advice.

    I also believe that self care is needed for ourselves in times like these…. when you feel like you are being consumed by what is happening in the world try to take a step back for yourself and take some time for self care…. Try to do something nice for yourself.

    I understand with OCD that things like the Ukraine crisis can become very stressful…. I understand I also suffered with this condition.

    Meditation taught me a lot for dealing with this condition…. It taught me that I’m not my thoughts but the watcher of my thoughts…..maybe you could try some meditation.. a guided one for learning to watch your thoughts. ( it takes practice)..

    Try not to try to work out why you feel the need to know everything about the invasion, ( I also found while I was going through OCD I always felt like I had to work out and analyse what I did)……. It was part of the OCD cycle I was in which was exhausting.

    Instead of feeling like you need to work these things out try to let go of that and instead focus on something positive in the present moment….

    I also use to have the need for control until I came to the realisation that I can’t control anything that is happening I can only control the way I react to it.

    I understand it’s hard sometimes to think we live such a beautiful life and there is suffering in other parts of the world…..

    I’ve found that if I practice gratefulness every day then I can have a happy appreciating feeling for what I have………… for the people who are less fortunate I try to stay positive for them and pray that something good will come their way……

    In Ukraine I try to focus my attention on the positive things that I hear from their president, the people of Ukraine who are fighting for their country….. they are not to be underrated because they are strong, resilient and full of fighting spirit and a human force like that are very admirable. 💪 very soulful people

    2 people found this helpful
  13. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    16486 posts
    7 March 2022 in reply to fred4761

    Hello Fred, in times like these if you have OCD then many other obsessions/compulsions can also begin, I'm sorry.

    Geoff.

    2 people found this helpful
  14. fred4761
    fred4761 avatar
    128 posts
    8 March 2022

    Thank you so much everyone for your reponses. I logged in today hoping to read a reply or two, and feel really blessed to have had so many helpful replies.

    I definitely have tried to be a bit more gentle on myself as far as my criticism and judgement goes. It is helpful to read that I am not alone with my 'brooding about an issue will help it' thinking pattern that I have found myself in lately. Sometimes it is easy to get caught up in my thinking and fool myself into believing I am the only person with this particular problem!

    Petal, I really appreciate the tip about not getting stuck in trying to figure out why I am thinking these particular thoughts. It hadn't even occured to me that this had become part of the OCD thought cycle that I find myself in at the moment. I guess that there is a part of me that somehow believes that if I can figure out every single thing then perhaps I can fix or change it. Probably goes in with the idea that I need to plan things out to every last detail and make lots of lists so that I can be prepared to deal with any possible outcome.

    When I think about my battle with OCD, Anxiety and Depresssion, I just feel so exhausted from the previous two years. I think that my levels of resiliency have been very depleted.

    3 people found this helpful
  15. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    8 March 2022 in reply to fred4761

    Hi fred4761,

    Glad our responses where helpful for you.

    Your certainly not alone. 😊

    Thats ok, I’m happy to help you with plenty of OCD tips……. I have many..

    I was very blessed to do a therapy for my OCD it was an intervention into the OCD this therapy gave me all the tools I needed to master my OCD…… you can learn all of the things that keep you in your OCD cycle and then learn how to disengage from it….

    Have you ever tried any therapy for your OCD?

    I also use to make lots of lists and plan every thing out to the last detail………… I learned through my therapy that I did this because I wanted “ certainty “.

    Through therapy I learned that nothing in life is 100 percent certain and I’ve learned to be ok with that.

    I no longer feel the need to make lists and plan things out….. because I just think what ever happens happens I can’t control the outcome.

    I understand how exhausting OCD is it’s very time consuming… I’m sorry you are feeling this way but you really can get better and it can be managed.

    Im here if you have any questions or want to chat

    1 person found this helpful
  16. On The Road
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    On The Road avatar
    289 posts
    8 March 2022

    Hi, great to see you all talking about this, sorry to hear that many people are struggling with this mentally, I'm also one of you.... even tho we live far far away from the epicentre of the war

    The whole thing has triggered me and I don't know why, I was feeling being threatened when I was reading the titles of news.... then I read through the articles....angry, sad, fearful, and even strangely motivated when I heard the brave people fighting back.... all feelings mixed

    Now I'm trying to limit myself from reading the news, my worries and anxiety won't help the event at all. I've already turned off every newsfeed from my phone...

    2 people found this helpful
  17. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    9 March 2022 in reply to On The Road

    Hi On The Road,

    Im sorry to hear that the war is also affecting you… I understand it can be triggering.

    I’ve read some up lifting articles on the people of Ukraine they really are very resilient strong people.

    I read of one couple who are in Ukraine defending their country and they married on the defence line in Kyiv.

    The bride in the article said “ I’m happy we are alive, that this day has started, that my husband is alive, and he is with me.

    Another article worlds oldest tennis player 97, staying in Ukraine and “ not afraid of anyone .“

    The Ukraine President has such empowering words that are getting the worlds attention….. he is “ lifting” his people….. such power.

    Such empowering words can bring belief into one’s soul.

    3 people found this helpful
  18. romantic_thi3f
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    romantic_thi3f avatar
    3191 posts
    16 March 2022 in reply to Petal22

    Hi

    Petal22 - What a beautiful post and thank you for starting this conversation!

    I've been struggling with Ukraine. I don't have friends or family there, but I seem to go from detached and dissociated to feeling hopeless and frustrated and sad. It's not normal for us to see dead bodies on tv, and the imagery is horrific and I'm not sure how to sit with that.

    If I change the channel and focus on Australia instead the tv talks about the floods and people losing everything.

    Is there anyone that's somehow found a balance? I'm not in a position to donate (and too far away to help out on the ground) so I think I'm feeling a bit helpless.

    rt

    1 person found this helpful
  19. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    16 March 2022 in reply to romantic_thi3f

    Hi romantic thi3f,

    Thank you 😊

    Im sorry that you have been struggling with Ukraine I understand it’s hard to see all of the footage on tv it’s heartbreaking…

    It can really open one’s eyes to see how blessed we are and the life that we get to live……

    I sometimes think to myself how tired I am …just from day to day things … but then I think of the people in Ukraine fighting for their country and they may have not slept for days…… I then think twice before I utter these words.

    Ukraine can teach the world a lot …….. we can look at them as leaders…… leaders that really show resilience and heart. ❤️💪 we can hold hope for Ukraine…. hope that they win their independence and hope that this war will end very soon.

    If the footage is too much in regards to Ukraine and the floods it’s ok to take a step back and put your attention on something more positive in the present moment.

    Lets hold HOPE…. hope that people who are suffering in parts of the world find peace soon and that the sun shines on them again soon ❤️🙏

    2 people found this helpful
  20. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3640 posts
    18 March 2022 in reply to Petal22
    What I am doing - there are so many choirs on Utube that are performing the Ukraine national anthem, and it's such a beautiful song - I listen and leave a message from Australia to support them.. it's wonderful to feel the choirs are doing this and I am sure it's nice for the choirs to know people are listening and supporting them - and I get to read messages from people all over the world who are horrified at what is happening. It's not much, but it makes me feel like at least I am showing a tiny bit of support...
    3 people found this helpful
  21. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    18 March 2022 in reply to Hanna3

    Hi Hanna3,

    Thats absolutely beautiful that you do that. ❤️ Thank you

    Yes, I listened to a children’s choir from Ukraine they were singing for world peace….. 🙏

    “Praying that this war will end very soon”.

    The sunflower 🌻 is the flower of Ukraine

    A sunflower will stand tall and find the sunlight even on the darkest of days. ❤️🙏

    I believe that “ good” will over power evil in this senseless war.

    and Ukraine will win their independence and there for their freedom 🙏

    ❤️🙏

    2 people found this helpful
  22. Doberman38
    Doberman38 avatar
    71 posts
    23 March 2022

    For anyone who's particularly worried about the nuclear dimension of all this, there was a recent ABC article from an expert which significantly alleviated my own fears. It basically said that it is extremely unlikely that Russia will use nuclear weapons in this conflict and that even if they did it would probably be in a tactical context against military targets and forces (not the strategic ones, aimed at obliterating cities, which everyone was freaking out over during the Cold War. They also said how if there was a confrontation with NATO, one of the things I was particularly worried about, that NATO states are well aware that Russia's policy is 'to escilate to de-escilate' and would therefore tred extremely carefully. I don't think anyone's going to let a doomsday situation happen. I just thought I'd share this since it certainly helped me :)

    2 people found this helpful
  23. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    24 March 2022 in reply to Petal22

    Today the 24th of March marks the day from a month since Russia invaded Ukraine in this senseless war.

    “Ukraines President Zelenskyy has asked people everywhere to show their solidarity” ..

    Let’s all pray together “ as one” that this senseless war will end very soon.

    We are with you Ukraine 🇺🇦 🌻❤️🙏

    2 people found this helpful
  24. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    11406 posts
    24 March 2022 in reply to Petal22

    Hi Petal

    Thankyou for your super caring thread topic

    Our family stand with Ukraine

    Nice1 Petal

    Paul

    4 people found this helpful
  25. sbella02
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    sbella02 avatar
    253 posts
    24 March 2022 in reply to Doberman38

    Thank you for the reassurance, that's good to know :)

    It's so difficult watching all of this in the news. My heart goes out to the beautiful people affected. I can't even imagine what it's like to be in their shoes.

    3 people found this helpful
  26. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    2145 posts
    27 March 2022 in reply to blondguy

    Thanks blondguy 😊

    If anyone is interested there is going to be a “ social media rally.”

    On April the 9th ……the biggest online event .

    It will support Ukrainian temporary migrants. #StandUpforUkraine

    I read there will be more information to follow. 🇺🇦❤️🙏

    2 people found this helpful
  27. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    11406 posts
    28 March 2022 in reply to Petal22

    Hey Petal

    appreciate the info re the online event for Ukrainian temporary immigrants on April 9

    keep it coming...mental health has no geographical boundaries so showing our support to people in Ukraine is the least we can do as a nationally based organization in Australia

    my kind thoughts

    Paul

    5 people found this helpful
  28. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    16486 posts
    1 April 2022 in reply to blondguy

    It's not only these poor people that have been decimated, they have our full sympathy in these abysmal atrocities, but what is also happening just outside of Australia, we need to be concerned about.

    Geoff.

    3 people found this helpful
  29. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    11406 posts
    8 April 2022 in reply to geoff

    Hi Geoff

    I hear you loud and clear and we are very.. very concerned about your point re Taiwan yet Ukraine is suffering badly as we speak. Im just sticking to the thread topic at this time.

    My best always

    Paul

    2 people found this helpful
  30. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    16486 posts
    9 April 2022 in reply to blondguy

    Hello Paul, thanks, and yes I accept what you are saying, but I am so flabbergasted by what Putin has done to these innocent people and if we do believe what the media has told us, his acts are totally barbaric with no consideration to anyone.

    It will take Ukraine years to be able to repair it's city and where is all this debris going to be deposited, it's just hideous.

    My heart goes out to all these people.

    Geoff.

Stay in touch with us

Sign up below for regular emails filled with information, advice and support for you or your loved ones.


Sign me up