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Forums / Anxiety / Did I screw things up?

Topic: Did I screw things up?

5 posts, 0 answered
  1. QuietMostofthetime
    QuietMostofthetime avatar
    2 posts
    23 August 2021

    So I had a job interview last week for a call center job and it was going pretty well, the person was complimenting my resume for what I have done, etc. I told them that I have anxiety and social anxiety and that this role is very much out of my comfort zone in terms of speaking on the phone for extended periods of time, they said "everybody has anxiety" which raised a few flags for me. Then rather suddenly I was pushed the question, that they are offering me the job and they wanted me to start in two days. I had other things that I had to do before then and I was overthinking about everything else when I had to process what they asked me. and because I didn't reply in the way they wanted for the response of a yes or a no with excitement, they instantly changed to a shocked disappointed expression, they then proceeded to give me 24 hours to think about it and didn't seem happy.

    Feeling guilty and compelled I wrote an email and said that I would accept the role. I then received a phone call which started out telling me that they were disappointed with my response. It made me feel guilty and like I did something so bad. After a while, I again accepted the job.

    Fast forward to today, I was supposed to go there in the morning however I felt this extreme pressure and guiltiness from how they made me feel for being myself, and I ended up emailing them and telling them that I couldn't come in because of my anxiety.

    They responded with an email saying that they hope I get the help I need and to contact them when I can, with the best for my future.

    I just feel like they don't like me and I feel like I would always feel this pressure if I was working under them.

  2. Pumpkinella
    Champion Alumni
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    Pumpkinella avatar
    98 posts
    26 August 2021 in reply to QuietMostofthetime

    Hi QuietMostofthetime,

    I was so shocked to read your message! I am truly sorry that you experienced that level of blatant rudeness, disrespect and arrogance. To be honest I think you absolutely made the right decision by quitting. Clearly your manager (or the the HR department - whoever was interviewing you) has no understanding of mental health and is not interested in supporting their employees. They don't even show consideration towards your (and I imagine anyone's) basic needs. Effectively demanding that a prospective employee start within two days with no regard for their situation or circumstance is abhorrent to me.

    I have no doubt that organisation has an extremely high turnover, there is no way they would be keeping onto their employees for long with that kind of work culture.

    But I want to say congratulations - you attended an interview and did well, your intuition was completely correct and you made the right decision in quitting and you were honest about your feelings - all of this takes guts. You should be patting yourself on the back.

    Just so you know I have continued in roles that I was concerned about and I blamed my concerns on my anxiety. In the end however I always ended up quitting and it was never the wrong decision. Just because we are anxious doesn't mean we cannot have good judgement. Don't feel you have made a mistake.

    I also wanted to remind you that you are also sussing the employer out. You are determining whether this is a good place to work. I think its fair to say that first impressions are important and indicate that you would not like to work in a place like that.

    Lastly, just as a side tip - I found call centre work particularly hard. It is notorious for stressful working conditions and poor management. May I suggest if you are looking for entry level positions you find something that is less intense - data entry or an entry level office administrator is where I found my start and its a much better transition.

    I hope you feel a bit relieved at least that you don't have to deal with those people anymore. Now you should treat yourself with something big or small because that was an ordeal. So remember to be kind to yourself and practice self care.

    Love

    Pumps

    1 person found this helpful
  3. Petal22
    Community Champion
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    Petal22 avatar
    1979 posts
    26 August 2021 in reply to QuietMostofthetime

    Hi QuietMostofthetime,

    Wellcome to our forums!

    Sorry you went through all of this, i don’t think I’d want to work for that employer if that was the way they spoke to me.

    I think you are better off not working there you will find a better job for you with management that treat you right.

    Always trust your gut if they made you feel uncomfortable you wouldn’t want to work there… you did nothing wrong…..

    I hope you are ok?

    Here to chat

  4. sbella02
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    sbella02 avatar
    204 posts
    26 August 2021 in reply to QuietMostofthetime

    Hi QuietMostofthetime,

    I'm so sorry to hear about your experience. As someone who came out of a toxic workplace about eight months ago, I resonate with this a lot. I have to say, it's really good that you're spotting the red flags early. I can only imagine how they would've treated you if you had begun working for them.

    I saw this advice on Tik Tok (of all places), but one lady was talking about how best to conduct yourself in job interviews. Interestingly, she happened to mention something that stuck with me. She suggested that in a job interview when they ask if you have any questions, you should ask them two key questions: "describe the person who was your best employee", and "what would success look like in this position to you?".

    She goes onto say that their responses to these questions will tell you a lot about who they are as an organisation. For example, if they say "our best employee always worked overtime without accepting pay and never complained" versus "our best employee would help other staff members and always gave 100% but still made time for themselves" you can gain so much insight into their values. Similarly, if they respond with "success would look like somebody who always accepts shifts last minute" versus "success would look like somebody who puts in effort and works well as part of a team", they're letting you know what they expect from you long-term.

    Based on their nonchalant and ignorant response to you, they don't sound like an organisation who would value mental health or prioritise your health in general. Honestly, you dodged a bullet there. They don't sound like they'd offer you a good working environment at all. You deserve an employer who will put your mental health first.

    Good luck in your future job searches! I hope my advice is of some use, albeit from a Tik Tok. If you need to chat with us some more, feel free! We're here for you.

    Kind regards, SB

  5. The Bro
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    The Bro avatar
    203 posts
    27 August 2021 in reply to QuietMostofthetime

    Gidday there Quietmostofthetime

    Your post was great and took us through the process pretty impressively. Thanks for reaching out on the forum. No you absolutely did not screw it up, rather dodged a bullet from the dodgy brothers I would say!

    Wow the comments and advice from Pumpkinella and Sbella2 are spot on and worth a mint!

    I have worked as Business Development Manager for a successful company that had a great product but a rotten attitude to its sales staff and their Call Center team. Both areas reported to me. Initially, at meetings it took quite a while for them to learn how to trust me and my motives. This is because it is commonplace for sales and Call Center people to be treated with little respect or compassion. Finally when they came around, and great results started to flow, the Company Board broke a promise to me and made a rotten decision on their commission remuneration structure which lowered their income.

    I ended up leaving and I found out recently the company has closed.

    I agree that call centre work is extremely stressful and all based on hourly statistics. You are little more than a cog in the machine and it seems that 'thanks' is a really neglected form of compensation.

    Can I make a suggestion? It seems from your 'nom de plume' that you are a quieter sort of person. I wonder if you would be better suited to a position where you are helping solve customers or prospect's problems, instead of hard core selling to them. Many large companies have true customer service departments and what they offer is basically solutions when a call comes in with a problem. This calls for empathy and understanding - would you say you had these personal qualities?

    Also, it might help if you listed the qualities you have, your dream job and reasons for that. Don't aim too high as that leads to disappointment.

    I have have taken on many mentoring positions over the years with groups of employees, running my own companies. I am very happy to help you if you felt comfortable writing out the above and making some suggestions for you based on that.

    Either way, this forum and myself are here to help.

    All the very best with your next application!

    Bye for now, The Bro

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