Im so glad you stopped by. Thank you so much for sharing!
Firstly, I'm sorry about your experience of being prescribed meds and told to cheer up. There are some truly unhelpful professionals out there. But there are also some really good ones. Have you considered trying to find someone new? I recently found a new GP and it has made such a difference!
The things you shared about over reacting and lashing out sound very much like me. I know when I was first diagnosed and learnt more about BPD, those kinds of things plus so many other parts of my life (like rigid black and white views of everything, self harm, thoughts of suicide, really unstable relationships that I tend to sabotage and so many other things) finally made sense. I know a diagnosis isn't for everyone but for me it has really helped me understand myself a bit more and also helped direct me to the right kind of support for the future.
Maybe you could try and find a psychologist or psychiatrist to speak to about your experiences and see what they think? Feel free to share more here if you like. Everyone here is really supportive and understanding!