My heart goes out to you as you manage such deeply challenging aspects of depression. Sometimes it can feel like a full time job, leaving you feeling exhausted in a number of ways, especially mentally.
I believe there are brilliant psychologists and good ones. Perhaps you've only met with good ones so far or even average ones. I imagine it's the case that it's not you, it could be the fact you're yet to meet with a truly brilliant psychologist.
I think a brilliant psychologist is a dynamic detective. They are incredible with clues and cues from their client. They are typically naturals who study psychology whereas others simply learn their craft from books and rarely naturally wonder beyond what they've learned.
Do you ever wonder what's wrong with a professional who can't manage to get to the bottom of things? While some may say 'It's the client's fault. I just can't get them to open up', a brilliant psychologist/detective might say 'There is an artful ability when it comes to bringing out the best in people. What fault do I possess which gets in the way of my ability to bring out the best in my client?' In the case of talk therapy, the best may relate to the client's sense of freedom in talking. Our sense of freedom can often bring out the best in us under a variety of circumstances.
Perhaps the professionals you've met throughout your depression have had opportunities to learn from you, yet they didn't. Perhaps they chose to keep seeing clients they could manage to understand or 'work out'. Unfortunately no one evolves through such simple choices. A brilliant psychologist will see you as not just a client but a teacher also.