Hi all, I've never really used these kind of forums before so bare with me.
Over the last few months I've managed to get myself into a pretty dark hole. I've taken months off work, putting pressure on my collegues and burning bridges, falling behind on all my bills, getting into debt and almost getting kicked out of my uni course twice.
I can go weeks on end without leaving my apartment, which I live in alone, without having any contact with anyone.
I'm lucky enough to have a great support network, but most of the time I have no interest in seeing anyone or doing anything.
Most of the time I'm not even depressed or anxious, just numb. I drink too much, sleep too much and spend most of my time watching movies and avoiding the world.
I honestly just don't know how to get myself out of this. I'm now so anxious about going back to work in an office where in sure there has been eye rolls and comments made about my extensive time off and unreliability.
I've let friends down on many important occasions by cancelling on them and I can feel them losing their patience with me. I just feel like a broken record.
I'm on meds and starting to see a new counsellor next week, but my self destructive patterns have become so severe I just can't see how to get out of this.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated :)