Day in and day out. He's here, sedated, with a ventilator, screens, tubes beeps. Uncertainty: will he ever come back home? 3 days before my husband went to hospital, he was diagnosed with autism. 28 years of a difficult life with him, with some good times in between. Was it dementia? or was it depression? what was it?. Now, we had a few years ahead of us with some counselling, I'd be able to endure his lack of understanding, his aloofness . We'd get closer and enjoy the last years of our life. But no, it was not meant to be, I had to call an ambulance, we are apart.Everytime the phone rings, I think 'This is the hospital, he's gone'. Living like this is absolute hell, I can't bear it.