My siblings haven't been in contact with me since they each married 30-40 years ago. I'm now middle aged, both my parents have died, and my fiancé after which I felt like I went through a nervous breakdown, the new career I'd spent 3 years studying for collapsed into a heap before I could finish. While my fiancé died 9 years ago and was really the catalyst, the grief of losing my mum returned and has remained raw. It's contributed to my social phobia coming back. I find other people talking about their family too painful to bear and keeping me isolated. No one understands the pain of having no family, or none that want to know you. I wish I could hit a delete button on some of my emotions! and develop a thick skin. I've wondered about rewriting my 'story' for the purpose of answering all the polite 'get to know you questions'. Only people with similar lived experiences get it, I really need to know how other people cope.

Hi Comfort, welcome

As a prior private investigator for many years you can find your siblings with that line of help. Or possibly Facebook or electoral roles which are free at any electoral office.

Having family is like freedom, you don't appreciate it unless you've lost it. So all these other people talking about family aren't thinking about your circumstances.

It's time you chase up your siblings. Take practical measures to do so. Good luck

Tony WK