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Forums / Grief and loss / How to deal with my mothers death

Topic: How to deal with my mothers death

5 posts, 0 answered
  1. shesawallflower
    shesawallflower avatar
    5 posts
    13 January 2018
    I lost my mother almost 2 months ago. It was a very big shock and very unexpected. She had a massive stroke right in front of me. She was in ICU for 3 days whilst on life support suffering from severe brain damage caused from the stroke. I keep getting flashbacks of the traumatic event that I usually can’t block out. I am tired of crying myself to sleep every night. I am still grieving, I need to talk to someone but I am unsure where to start. Do I need counseling, therapy, or a psychiatrist?
    1 person found this helpful
  2. Birdy77
    Valued Contributor
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    Birdy77 avatar
    2299 posts
    14 January 2018 in reply to shesawallflower

    Dear Shesawallflower,

    I am so so sorry for your terrible loss. My heart goes out to you.

    Of course you are still deeply grieving , and will be for a while to come. It is still very early days.

    I think you would really benefit from counselling sweetheart, you need somebody to talk to. Did they offer you any ongoing support from the hospital where your Mum was in ICU? You could ring them there and they could help organise some grief counselling.

    If you ever need to talk to someone, you can call the beyondblue helpline 1300 22 46 36. A gentle person will take your call day or night. You don't have to go through this alone.

    Do you have any other support around you? Siblings, friends?

    Talk here anytime, we are here for you.

    🌻 birdy

    1 person found this helpful
  3. Ellie05
    Ellie05 avatar
    178 posts
    14 January 2018 in reply to shesawallflower

    I am so incredibly sorry shesawallflower. I can't imagine what you are going through.

    I would start by booking a long appointment with your GP. They will know which type of therapy or counsellor will be most beneficial and will be able to give you a referral.

    1 person found this helpful
  4. gld
    gld avatar
    625 posts
    14 January 2018 in reply to shesawallflower

    Hi shesawallflower,

    I feel i am unable to image how you are feeling after losing your mum in this way. My heart goes out to you and your family throughout this time.

    Grief is a very personal thing and there is no set time it will take each of us to feel comfortable with our loss. I feel having people someone to talk to is able to make us feel we do not have to go through this alone. Birdy77and Ellie05 have some great suggestions to gain supports you desire.

    Be kind to yourself and give yourself time to begin feeling less overwhelmed.

    You do not have to go through this alone.

    Gen

    1 person found this helpful
  5. quirkywords
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
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    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    quirkywords avatar
    13093 posts
    14 January 2018 in reply to shesawallflower

    Hi she's a wallflower,

    I want to welcome you to the forum and thank you for taking the brave step to Post here.

    I too want to extend my sympathy too for your recent loss.

    The loss of one's mother is painful and emotional .

    Gen, Ellie and birdy have all given helpful advice.

    It is very early days and you need to give yourself time to grieve. As it has been mentioned before, grief is personal and there is no right wa to grieve.

    I found writing down like a letter to my dad, really helped me but 'tis may not work for you. Sometimes just jotting down your thoughts and feelings can help .

    I am not sure if there are organisations near you that help people with grief and loss but if there is,they can be very helpful and some offer free counselling.

    If you can find a grief counsellor or a counsellor specialises in grief I that that would be helpful.

    Do you have any family that can support you and you can tal to.

    THis is a safe friendly and support place. Fell free to post here when you feel like it.I would like to hear how you are going.

    Quirky

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