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Forums / Long term support over the journey / Anyone had to spend days alone without anyone to talk to?

Topic: Anyone had to spend days alone without anyone to talk to?

  1. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    13 January 2020 in reply to Katyonthehamsterwheel

    You sound like you would have been lovely in aged care work Katy.

    I get upset when people are rude to me. I tend to take things too personally and have to realize it's about them not me. I'm sorry someone was nasty to you. I try to think now what unhappy or angry people they must be and how I have to be thankful I'm not like them.

    I cleaned my bathroom and kitchen this afternoon so I feel quite pleased with myself. Am a bit anxious about tomorrow though - my car needs a service (no money) so I hope it makes it up the mountains OK...

    I was amazed Sam didn't lash out - I think he got such a shock he just tried to get under cover. He is a sweet little guy. It must have scared him though, he's had several clumps of fur fall out today and that only happens when he's extremely anxious. I'll definitely give him a pat from you!

    I'm glad I'm not the only one who has to raid the cupboards/freezer looking for food sometimes! Sam got very sick before we left for here, it cost over a thousand dollars for treatment (liver problem) but if I hadn't borrowed it he would have died. Those special diets cost a heap don't they, but it keeps him well.

    He's looking bored and I promised him a game so I'd better go and amuse my furry friend! Take care of yourself and don't let the rude person bother you for too long - I had a guy abuse me on my way home tonight - it's nasty isn't it. Hugs!

  2. Katyonthehamsterwheel
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    14 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hello

    It sounds like you had quite a few worries about today, so just wanted to pop in and say I hope it's all going well for you. Perhaps you'll need to come unwind in the BB cafe later with a nice beverage :)

    Stormy and I have been up and had a morning walk. It's another 30 degree day here so that will be nice. I have yoga later in the park, which I'm really looking forward to. It was lovely last week. Apart from that I'm not sure how i'll fill the day. Maybe some gardening. Probably not any housework haha

    Kind thoughts, Katy

  3. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    14 January 2020 in reply to Katyonthehamsterwheel

    Hi Katy, thanks for thinking of me i'm just back from the long drive - it's after 2pm now. The groomer was pleasant and did a good job so Sam's now looking cooler - the yard is full of burrs from the drought so apart from the heat a short coat is needed to stop all the burrs getting caught in his fur! It was costly though.

    Had a look around the town which I knew years ago - growing rapidly feels almost citified now, busy traffic. I took Sam to one of the walks we used to do - nice shade trees still alive there thankfully - it was years ago but I'm sure he remembered it and he enjoyed the stroll. While he was being groomed I had a look in town and it's changed a lot and feels more like a city. The population is really growing out here. I just feel like I need somewhere quieter. It does seem to have nicer walks for Sam there though than here. Decided in the autumn when it's cooler I'll take a look at some of the smaller towns that aren't too far away. Trouble is the cost again.

    I was tired before we started and am tired now, it's very hot, so might have a lie down then go and sit in my friend's house in the aircon for a couple of hours and rest/read/have a cuppa. She's gone away, don't know when she is back.

    Yoga in the park sounds lovely, they have that here sometimes it looks much nicer to do it surrounded by trees in the outdoors.

    I'll have a quiet day tomorrow as Thursday I have to try yet another GP, and then go to the book club for the first time so all stressful.

    Pats to Storm and I hope you have a pleasant afternoon. I'll look in again tonight. And no, definitely no housework today! Take care xx

  4. Katyonthehamsterwheel
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    14 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hello again

    Well, all in all it doesn't sound like it was too bad. The town where I live is starting to feel a bit too big too. More people, more traffic, more open space being filled in with "stuff". It's hard when you rely on public housing and you're kind of stuck though. I've been thinking for a while I'd like to move to somewhere smaller. One powerball hey? Not that I ever buy lotto, can't afford that either! haha

    I've been out and about doing some window shopping. Picked up a few things I needed but mostly just day dreaming about all the things I'd like to buy. Yoga in an hour. Hope you're enjoying the aircon!

    Hugs, Katy

  5. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    14 January 2020 in reply to Katyonthehamsterwheel

    Hi Katy,

    I think it's overpopulation and all the people trying to flee the cities... now the regional towns are getting too big!

    Am watching volume 2 of The Bridge and it's getting exciting (Scandi noir)

    I hope your yoga went well tonight, it sounds like you enjoy it which is great.

    Yes I dream of winning Powerball or something like that too - would be nice to be able to move wherever you wanted - and to have a house just a bit nicer than what Housing gives. I'm thankful for it, but something a bit more comfortable would be nice...

    My computer battery is low so I'm only popping in briefly. Good to hear you are sounding better! Take care. Pats to doggie. Sam's tired from being groomed and the hot day. It's hot tonight but we are so hoping we're in for some rain they say it's on the way... all the best!

  6. Paw Prints
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    1651 posts
    14 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hello Hanna,

    I'm shocked that anyone would attack Sam (or any dog) like that. You both must have been so frightened during & after. I hope you have still feel able to take him for walks locally. Did you let the police know?

    What a lovely memory sitting talking to someone so alone in life. I used to volunteer doing meals on wheels in my younger day. So many of the people on my rota had no family or family that didn’t visit. The hardest part was not being able to stay longer than a few minutes as we had to get all the meals delivered in a certain time frame. It really sounds like you would get a lot out of volunteering to visit an aged care unit or perhaps visiting isolated people in their own homes through either the council or charity schemes.

    Thankfully Woofa doesn’t need clipping, I dread to imagine what they would charge if little Sam is $70. He’s sulking at the moment, laying on his bed in the lounge with his back to me, because I told him off for bravely barking at the pillow on my bed.

    How did lounging in the air con go? Pity you can’t spend the night there, a few good nights of sleep would do wonders for you. Good on you for managing some housework. I got as far thinking about it.

    Winning lotto would be lovely, wouldn't it. Like Katy I don't regularly buy tickets, just the odd quick pick every few years, so it remains a pipe dream.

    Take care

    Paws

  7. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    15 January 2020 in reply to Paw Prints

    Hi Paws!

    I just left a hello for you when I was answering Moonstruck on another post. No I didn't go to the police, Sam didn't have any injuries (thankfully) so I really didn't know what they could do - I just warned another couple of regular dog walkers in the area about it though in case it happens again. Yes it made me shaken afterwards and now I'm anxious about being in the park if nobody much is around...

    The new groomer did a lovely job on Sam but yes $70 is a lot - I spoke to a friend in the city who has the same kind of dog and she pays $80 so I guess it's pretty usual for dog grooming to be costly. I have to keep his coat short in the hot weather, in the winter I can let him get fluffy to keep warm and save some money!

    It was lovely yesterday after the long drive I went to my friend's house and put on the aircon, it was a stifling hot afternoon and I was very thankful to just sit and rest in the cool and Sam had a blissful sleep after exploring her yard. We stayed until about 6pm then came here for dinner. She's only gone to her house in the mountains she is so tired, so I'm not sure when she will be back, it might be sooner than expected, but we'll go there again today as it's going to be hot again. We are hoping tomorrow we might get storms and some rain at long last.. I do hope so.

    My mother made me help out with meals on wheels when I was a teenager and I remember how lonely some of the people were and like you we had to rush and really what they needed was someone to sit down and have a cuppa and a chat with them... it was sad.

    I was talking to my old GP friend in the city and because I am alone here so much he said I should contact somewhere and get a visitor to come and talk to me. I found that odd as what I have been thinking about is volunteering to be a visitor myself and that way I'm giving someone else company as well as helping myself. I think I'd prefer that.

    I can't plug in my laptop at my friend's house but will log in again tonight. Pats to Woofa why was he barking at the pillow! Furry hugs from Sam (well actually there's not quite so furry at the moment!) Take care.

  8. Paw Prints
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    1651 posts
    15 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hi Hanna,

    I wasn't thinking of telling the police as in making a formal complaint, rather letting them know that this happened to you. You may not be the only one targeted & it would be helpful if the police are trying to work out a pattern of offending.

    I missed all the rain that came through today, could see & hear thunderstorms in the distance but not a drop fell here. We've had a lot of smoke the last couple of days, so far the southerly hasn't cleared it. Hopefully if you do get the rain in the next few days it will finally help clear the air for you & drop the temperatures. Is Sam a playing in puddles boy or is he like Woofa a princess who hates getting his feet wet.

    I'm surprised that Sam was the only one to have a siesta in the air con. After all the struggling to sleep in the heat, weren't you tempted to have a nanna nap. I decided to have a lie down this afternoon & only woke because Woofa was nudging me as it was food time. I'm sure he has a clock in his stomach. His barking at the pillow may have been because as he moved about, it moved or perhaps because it didn't move when he tried to move it.

    I couldn't believe it when I was in Woolies on Sunday, it's only just January & they already have easter eggs & hot x buns in store. If they keep this up next years eggs may go on sale Boxing Day.

    Pats to Sam

    Paws

  9. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    15 January 2020 in reply to Paw Prints

    Hi Paws,

    We are supposed to have thunderstorms here and it's very muggy and hot but so far not a drop of rain and no sign of any. We desperately need it, everything here is dying it's quite horrifying. My back yard is just dirt and burrs.

    I got bored in the house today and felt like a walk so left a bit early... I had parked in the driveway as the drive down to my friend's house is extremely steep and narrow with trees each side, and once I drive down I can't back out without her to guide me. I checked there was room for anyone to get around my car on the footpath without having to go onto the road, which is extremely narrow and barely room for two cars to go past each other, so it doesn't feel safe to park on the side of the road.

    Well I came out to find a parking fine $268 under one of my windscreen wipers. Oh help. I've been driving for 47 years now and have never had a traffic ticket or parking ticket of any kind and now nearly $300! Who'd have thought on a residential street they were going around checking? I figure I'll add this to my list of things that have gone wrong since I moved here! The list is growing!

    I'll see if my perfect driving history has any power to give me a caution instead of the fine, but from what I read it probably won't. So that's the icing on the cake really... rather costly for a bit of aircon for a couple of hours, sigh.

    A young coulpe has moved into the rental house that backs onto my backyard and they have two huge black dogs, I don't know what they are but from the thick necks and heavy chests I'd say some kind of hunting dog... well they bark non-stop and every time I go out the back door or Sam goes outside they go hysterical. Of course little Sam's silly enough to egg them on and huffs and puffs at the back fence, when the two dogs fling themselves at the colourbond fence trying to get at him it's almost frightening they almost knock it down.

    Sam wouldn't even make a meal for them he's more like an entrée. My silly little dog acting tough on the other side of the fence oh dear!

    Yes I noticed the hot cross buns were out directly after Christmas and the eggs - soon we'll be having Halloween and then the Xmas things can come out by early Spring... I remember when our mother used to bake the hot cross buns herself, and we got so excited about Easter, and you only got an Easter egg on Easter Sunday. I think the joy of anticipation is lost today!

    Pats to Woofa - maybe he just likes pillow fights!

  10. Lady Nova
    Lady Nova avatar
    117 posts
    15 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    I think we much be hearing the same thunder. The low rumbles have been echoing off the mountains for a while now. The heat is beginning to feel like the air isnt moving even now near midnight. The ceiling fan doesnt seem to be making much difference.

    I have been reading about loneliness here. Loneliness seems to a common theme. Even though I have my family, partner and 2 sons, with me most of the time. I often feel lonely and disconnected. The whole time I have lived here, 8 years now, I have only met 4 friends and two of those have moved away and one is battling breast cancer and it doesn't look good. The fourth friend has an elderly mother who takes up a lot of his time and who lost her house in Conjola in the fires. I miss them all. I never really had friends growing up so I guess I fall in friend very hard. It's awfully hard finding friends who can cope with a level of weird I represent.

  11. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
    8756 posts
    16 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hi Hanna,

    Sorry to read you were given a parking ticket! Some streets are so very narrow. If cars park on either side there is no room for any traffic to get through at all. It does seem in some areas planning was not at all considered. How do emergency vehicles get through if people park on the road!

    Hope you are able to get this ticket considered.

    I also hope the dogs at the bark calm down. If not, would you consider contacting the council? They will have dog laws. Maybe in time the dogs will settle down.

    Did the rain arrive? In our region it is so dry we have forgotten what rain is. It is the same in so much of the country. Is it any cooler there or just humid now?

    Cheers from Dools

  12. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
    8756 posts
    16 January 2020 in reply to Lady Nova

    Hi Lady Nova,

    Yes, loneliness does seem to be quite prominent in many people's responses and posts here. It can be hard to make and keep friends.

    I joined a group in a small town close to us. There was some kind of an argument one day when I was not present and now the group has separated with the original ladies having their own group and the more recent new comers meeting on a different day. It seems ridiculous.

    I also find it amusing when I suggest telephoning someone and they tell me to just text them. I even heard one lady say "Why are they trying to call me, why don't they just send a message. That is what mobile phones are for!"

    Sorry to read about your friend with breast cancer. Are you able to support her in some way?

    There must be so many lonely people out there. If only there were ways to connect and make this world seem less unfriendly.

    Cheers to you from Dools

  13. Lady Nova
    Lady Nova avatar
    117 posts
    16 January 2020 in reply to Doolhof
    I am very much supporting her. We had her staying here for a fortnight since NYE so that she had people around her during all the fires and chaos. I have been cooking bland food for her as she cannot tolerate a lot and spices and she is in such a state that cooking is the last thing on her mind. While she was in hospital, and then staying with a retired nurse friend for her recovery, my eldest was feeding and caring for her dog, chooks, birds and fish. Since she lost her partner just over a year ago we have been including her in our family DnD nights and she is HOOKED. I currently have her car on loan and any time she needs to get somewhere I drive her.
    I am doing everything I can to stave off any feelings of isolation, fear or loneliness.
    2 people found this helpful
  14. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    16 January 2020 in reply to Doolhof

    Hi Dools,

    Yes I'm having a bad day today with the parking fine (I'm on a pension), the prospect of trying a new GP this afternoon, and having to go to a book club for the first time later today as well. I'm a bit stress overloaded!

    We did get some rain finally in the early hours of the morning, now it's very humid. I hope we get more everything here is dying. It felt strange to hear rain again after so long.

    I think the couple behind me who own the dogs are trying to calm them down, I understand it can be difficult with dogs in a new home so I'm trying to give them time to settle them. They're certainly annoying and my little fellow doesn't help by enjoying baiting them by hanging around the fence huffing and puffing - although he's just posturing and doesn't bark at all.

    So nice to hear from you. I've been wondering where Birdy is, I think she's been caught up in the bushfires I'll try and look her up here later today. Are you keeping OK Dools? Thanks for the kind post. I'm going to go now and have a look at the street where my friend's house is so I can write a request for leniency to the Revenue Dept.

    It's just frustrating when you know it's the council making money - I looked it up and the offence used to be about $114 they put it up to $268 this year - that's a huge jump! Take care Dools and thanks for posting!

  15. Katyonthehamsterwheel
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    17 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hi Hanna

    I've been a bit absent. How did you go with your new gp? And with book club? I hope it all went well.

    Katy

  16. Paw Prints
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    17 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hello Hanna,

    $268 is outrageous, you weren't blocking emergency vehicles for pity sake. I've been trying to think of a positive "parking ticket" outcome for you. They do sometimes rescind them, maybe if you go in person to the council offices & explain you had checked there was enough space for people to pass you might be lucky & get someone kind who will cancel it for you. Otherwise you can ask to pay it off rather than trying to find it all at once.

    How did you go with the new GP, hopefully she was more understanding than the last one & has put your meds back up. With everything your dealing with at present, you really need a GP you can feel comfortable with to talk to.

    Did you end up going to the book club or was it one thing too many after the day you've had.

    Rain - nice, humidity - awful. I'll keep fingers & paws crossed that the decent rain fall forecast for the next week settles over your place & cools everything down.

    I had to chuckle poor Sam being described as an entree. What is it with dogs not knowing their own size. Almost all the little dogs we encounter want to have a go at Woofa, even when his head is bigger than they are.

    Hugs

    Paws

  17. Lady Nova
    Lady Nova avatar
    117 posts
    17 January 2020 in reply to Paw Prints
    sometimes dogs have an inflated sense of wolf
  18. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    17 January 2020 in reply to Doolhof

    Hi Dools, what on earth did people have an argument about that made them separate into two groups like that? We are talking about adults I take it? Gracious.

    Oooh I can so relate about the texting instead of talking to someone. I had a lady I met here one day who lives in another town text me virtually non-stop all day recently - I finally suggested to her (via text) that we actually speak to each other (as in have a conversation how unusual!). Well 25 texts later she was still hysterical about the idea saying she didn't have time to chat for 10 minutes (but had time to text for hours). I don't get it, I like to actually converse with people?

    I think heaps of people are lonely and it gets harder to make friends once you're older and not working. I think it's also hard if you're single. At my age you don't fit in with most women my age unless you have children and grandchildren. And my old friends have scattered far and wide as they retired - some to Queensland, some to northern NSW, some to Tasmania. Makes it harder when the long term friendships are now long distance as well... after a while you do lose touch.

  19. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    17 January 2020 in reply to Lady Nova

    Hi Paws, Hi Katy, Hi Lady Nova & anyone else!

    I went onto the NSW Revenue website you can request leniency for a fine. I spent ages today filling in online pages of details before finding you had only 1000 characters to explain why you should be given leniency and a caution instead of the fine.

    They had taken four photographs of my car from different angles. You could see I'd parked with plenty of room behind my car not to block pedestrians walking by. Anyway I did my best explaining that the driveway is too steep & narrow with trees on each side for me to reverse into our out of without someone directing me and I was alone, that I felt the street is too narrow to be safe parking there as cars passing are forced onto the wrong side of the road (they had a picture of a car parked on the road and you could see how narrow the road was) & it's a busy street and that I had 47 years of an unblemished driving record and requested a caution please. So now I wait and see but I'm not too hopeful.

    Today there were cars parked all over driveways and the nature strip in the street, for the same reason as me - the road is too narrow for cars to pass safely. Wonder if they all got booked like me?

    Yep went to the book club, small but friendly group It was rather nice to actually talk to other human beings for a while...

    New GP unimpressive - a moderate improvement on the last two but no help increasing my meds in fact she cut back on my anti-inflammatory medication which will probably have me in agony - I have a neurological condition in my hands and feet and it can be terribly painful. What do these doctors have against drugs, some are actually really useful? She wasn't abusive but none of the GPs here seem to be friendly, and only 10 minutes per consultation allowed. So I figure she'll have to do while I continue to shop around for someone better. They are making my GP back in Small Coastal Town look like an absolute jewel! At least he always pleasant...

    Yes little Sam forgets he's barely a snack for a big dog. I think they do bring out his inner wolf! Today no rain but much cooler, took Sam for a really good walk this afternoon. When Sam is happy walking he really does get a smile on his face, lots of people remark on it. So we passed by one young woman who stopped and said "Oh that's the nicest smile I've seen all day, that's made my day!" and I said is he smiling? And she said yes it's georgeous. So that was nice it made her happy.

    Cheers to all!

    1 person found this helpful
  20. Lady Nova
    Lady Nova avatar
    117 posts
    17 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3
    Having to call someone sends me into a spin also. I have extreme anxiety using a phone
  21. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
    8756 posts
    17 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hi Everybody,

    Please excuse my general comment here to all. My mind is really tired and so am I. My body is telling me it is time for bed, but I don't want to be awake at 2.00 a.m.

    Dogs of all kinds make me smile when I see how happy they look. Some little dogs do have a big attitude, a bit like a bantam rooster I saw once bossing around geese!

    Hanna, hope you are able to sort out the parking fine! Also hope you enjoy the book club.

    A family member doesn't like talking on the phone, doesn't really enjoy texting either so when they do communicate in someway it is very special! Guess some people have anxiety and other issues.

    Some places are getting much needed rain. Our region seems to miss out and we desperately need rain like so many areas. We have trees dying so I might try to water them somehow.

    Cheers to you all from Dools

  22. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    17 January 2020 in reply to Doolhof

    Hi Dools, hope you manage to get a decent night's sleep. We have trees dying everywhere here too and desperately needed more rain.

    I like the sound of that bantam hen - a hen with attitude! Geese can be pretty scary too. Brave chicken!

    Take care, hugs from us here

  23. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
    8756 posts
    18 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hi Hanna and All,

    I haven't slept well for years, I have tried so many different ways to get a good night's sleep, pills and potions and nothing seems to work. I always feel so tired and exhausted. Oh well. That is how it is I suppose.

    I'm working both days of the weekend so hope to do a little watering this morning and again this evening. We have a few cooler days but no rain on the horizon. We are fortunate we can still water at all! I save water in the house as well when doing the dishes and washing my hands into a bucket in the laundry, that water goes on plants out the back door.

    I've just started reading a book about a group of people somewhere in Australia who have decided to live out in the bush for a year.

    With all these fires, it would be interesting to see how many dwellings and people are discovered living off the grid, people who have tried to escape society or who have been left behind.

    My father was a volunteer fire fighter for decades, he would tell us of all kinds of things they would find in fire zones.

    Hope you all have an okay kind of a day.

    Cheers from Dools

  24. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    18 January 2020 in reply to Doolhof

    Hi Dools,

    I've always been a poor sleeper and it gets worse as you get older. Interestingly it's often inherited - my father had terrible problems getting to sleep, so I wonder if either of your parents had/have the problem?

    I play music quietly in the bedroom I find that can help but I have to take sleeping tablets and often they don't work. It seems to be one of those things you're just stuck with, but darn annoying when you're tired and want to sleep and can't!

    I sometimes fantasy about living off the grid somewhere, but then things like these bushfires hit and what are your chances? And how to you start again?

    Where I lived in Small Coastal Town there was a woman who chose to live in the bush on the nearby mountain, I once or twice saw her paddle her canoe into town for supplies. I can understand it, some people need to be alone.

    Your father must have had some interesting stories I'd love to hear them... good to hear from you. Cheers.

  25. Lady Nova
    Lady Nova avatar
    117 posts
    18 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3
    I am not sure about off grid, but I would love to live somewhere less peoply
  26. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    18 January 2020 in reply to Lady Nova
    Me too Lady Nova - this town is getting too big and busy - traffic and parking a bit of a nightmare. I'd like somewhere quieter... more relaxing. I get stressed driving around here!
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  27. Katyonthehamsterwheel
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    19 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hi Hanna

    How are you going with the changes to your meds? You sounded like you might be not so good, in the BB cafe thread, so thought I'd check in here and say I'm thinking of you. You haven't had much luck with the gp's there. I remember when I had to see a different gp from my usual, to get another script for a codeine based product after the changes came in, and he made me feel like a junkie. He was incredibly rude. I tried to explain that my regular gp had recommended the pain meds in the first place for my migraines, and that they worked for me, and it was just that she wasn't available to see. I was so upset. I told my regular gp the next time I saw her and she replied that it was ridiculous that some gp's are against medications that patients themselves find helpful. A good gp really is a godsend!

    You mentioned The Tunnel in one of your posts too. I've also seen and really enjoyed that one. I think I've run out of scandi noir series to watch unfortunately. They are my firm favourite. I did see mention of a recent release book in the genre, on facebook, so I'll keep my eye out for that. Last night I decided to watch the original Jurassic Park, just for some easy watching.

    Are you still staying at your friend's place in the aircon? It's a lovely breezy 28 degrees here today. I went to the park with my brother and my nephew this morning, and my nephew insisted I have a few turns on the flying fox. It was quite fun actually. What are you and lovely Sam up to? Thinking of you both, Katy :)

  28. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    19 January 2020 in reply to Katyonthehamsterwheel

    Hi Katy! Lovely to hear from you!

    It's so hard to find a good GP these days isn't it? I can imagine the trouble you had with the codeine med - I also have to take a codeine based med sometimes and you'd think I was out selling the stuff honestly from the reaction of the GPs here. I'm still on my full pain meds but as soon as I run out she's put me on half, I can imagine I will be back in agony. Found a guy here who sounded like a good GP, was voted best GP in the state, mature age, when I went to the website it says he's off on extended leave, so there goes that idea...

    I've been really lonely today. Kept wishing I had someone to talk to but there wasn't anyone. My friend is back tomorrow, when she left it turned cool and it's been pleasantly cool ever since, from tomorrow on it's meant to get very hot again and she'll be back! Talk about bad timing, just when I could use the aircon. I haven't needed it this week! I've only spent a bit of time there as it's easier here with my things around me - it was the aircon in hot weather I needed! My only other friend here has had her mother staying from the city for the last week and is now going to the city for the next couple of weeks, so no company there.

    I texted an old friend in the city this afternoon and said I wished I wasn't so alone here and she just texted back about the weather. What is it about telling someone you're lonely that has the same effect as telling them you've got an infectious disease???!!! She has a lot of family around her, I wonder if it's because they don't even understand what it's like?

    I do wish I had SOME family - a brother or niece - but unfortunately I don't have contact with any of them or know where they are, which makes me feel even more alone. I really do depend on Sam which is probably obvious by now!

    The dept of housing did an inspection here on 29 November, shortly after I moved in, and now they've written they're doing another one on 30th January, which is only two months apart. I'm going to ring them and ask why, it feels very intrusive and I have to wait in for most of the day... they didn't find anything wrong before so I don't know why they are doing this. I detest inspections they intrude on my privacy and I get very anxious.

    I'll watch something pleasant tonight on TV, Jurassic Park was a good idea! Sorry to sound a bit low tonight, lovely to hear from you. Thanks for posting! Hugs from Sam.

  29. Paw Prints
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    Paw Prints avatar
    1651 posts
    19 January 2020 in reply to Hanna3

    Hello Hanna,

    What is it about telling someone you're lonely that has the same effect as telling them you've got an infectious disease???!!! or like saying you have mental health issues!!... I really don't know... is it they can't empathise?... do they think it's catching?... is it fear?... all of the above?... or is it that there is no quick fix so there is no simple response? Well there is a simple response... to simply be a friend & be there to talk about anything & everything.

    The only times I have ever truly felt lonely have been when I've been in a group of people, like at a party. I never feel lonely when I'm at home alone as long as I have a 4 legged companion roaming the house.

    I agree about the inspections being too close. You're not upsetting the neighbours by throwing wild parties or anything that would warrant them needing to keep a close eye.

    I broke a back molar yesterday while eating a sandwich of all things. So now I have very sharp edges which are pressing into my cheek & the side of my tongue. It's hurting to eat, drink & talk. So which is the greater... the pain I'm in or my fear of dentists? Right now pain trumps fear, so I will be ringing one tomorrow.

    Pats to Sam

    Paws

  30. Hanna3
    Hanna3 avatar
    3219 posts
    19 January 2020 in reply to Paw Prints

    Hi Paws! Gosh I'm sorry to hear about your tooth, ouch that must hurt! Yes I don't know anyone who likes going to the dentist but at times like this you definitely need to. Poor you! Let me know how you get on...

    Yes I've felt like that at parties/in groups of people too - I'm too introvert, I can't do small talk. The last party I went to was in Small Coastal Town for a choir I was in there - I'm always stuck on my own in groups like that - as soon as possible I slipped out the door and drove home with a feeling of great relief to be out of there! I vowed I simply wouldn't ever go to another party.

    I think I'm thoroughly homesick more than just lonely. I just miss where I came from that's my problem. But I don't understand why people can't chat for a minute or just at least text back when I text that I'm very alone... I just keep wishing I was sitting at my favourite quiet little café by the water, with Sam, reading a book. I think I find it stressful here and I'm missing the peace and quiet....

    Apparently the tenants who were here before me (I'm in public housing) were absolutely terrible. I can see where they've had to patch the walls because they smashed them. When I arrived the neighbours didn't speak for a couple of weeks - then the guy next door came by with a bottle of wine for me and said how relieved he was they had a quiet neighbour and told me how terrible it had been living next to screaming domestic fights etc etc for years... then the other neighbours gradually said hello and said how terrible it had been and how relieved they were to have a quiet woman neighbour with a small dog...

    So then I realised they hadn't spoken to me because they were waiting for fights/screaming etc to happen but it was just me and Sam and then they were so relieved... not that they've spoken to me since, nobody here seems to mix - but I'm very quiet and Sam is too. So yes I don't understand about the inspections so I'm going to phone tomorrow and find out why, but even that makes me anxious.

    I hope you can get to a dentist tomorrow that must be painful. Going to the dentist is yuk so I'll be thinking of you. I hope you can post tomorrow and let me know how you got on. Take care Paws!

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