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Forums / Long term support over the journey / Blue's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day (life viewed through the lens of depression)

Topic: Blue's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day (life viewed through the lens of depression)

  1. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    11398 posts
    17 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hey Bluguru...what does this clown of a neighbor play on his stereo? I read on another post that you use a electron microscope to analyze any anxious thought that you have. I still do that to a point. Its just taken Claire Weekes (self help for your nerves) to adjust my thinking so I can pay as little attention as I can to an anxious thought. She calls this floating....or 'accepting'. It didnt make any sense to me in 1983 when I bought her basic paperback in how to dispel any bad thoughts...Its just taken me about 15 years to understand that she was only trying to let sufferers of anxiety/depression know that these symptoms/thoughts are only 'feelings'.

    Dr Claire Weekes was a psychiatrist that suffered from anxiety disorder.....an unusual combination....After wearing the little paperback out I eventually understood that accepting these thoughts/symptoms was a key that unlocked the door to 'some' peace of mind. The title of the book is daggy but it was written when doctors prescribed anxiety sufferers with an old fashioned calmative to help them with their 'nerves' (it is used now for chronic back pain)

    Thanks for asking how I am...My German Shep/Chow Chow is still learning English :-)...My dad has lost the ability to use his cell phone in the last few days. He just cant 'read' the right number anymore. I delivered him some Beef Casserole today so he can get some iron. He looked as white as a sheet. I have invited him to loiter around here (so I can care for him) for a few days but he isnt interested. There really isnt much more I can do.

    Mr Woof! xx......thankyou for being there Bluguru

  2. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    18 July 2016 in reply to blondguy

    Hey Paul, said clown is always playing doof doof, which I can't stand. All I hear is that damn bass. Can't sleep or relax or focus on anything with that crap going on.

    I get what you're saying about bad thoughts. For me, the close scrutiny of them includes recognising what is misinformation or an irrational emotional response and chucking it out the window, so to speak. I don't mean dwelling on each thing to the point of letting it consume me, if you were concerned about that. I'm glad the book has given you some help in that department.

    I'm sorry to hear things are going backwards for your dad, and that he's resisting your help. You're doing what you can, and having seen in another thread that he's caused you some significant hurts in the past, I can only commend you for being there and as steadfast as you have been for him. You're a great son.

    I've been doing okay recently. I think my meds are helping and the sun's come out the last few days and helped me feel a bit better. I've been getting a few things done around the house, which is good, and spending time with my man and my birds, which is also good. Mr Feisty is on my head, as usual. :) Hope Prince is doing well - I brought him and the other pups some treats in the Café the other day, it's still there for when next you bring him in. Give him a pat for me.

    Blue.

  3. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    19 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Today has been a long day. Not a bad one really, though first root canal appointment was this afternoon. My mouth is still numb and doesn't quite work properly yet, which is annoying because I'm starting to get hungry. Also my back was starting to get better, but now I seem to have pinched a nerve or something, and it's worse again. Fighting off a cold that's been trying to get its hooks into me for a while too, so just generally very run-down and sore, physically. Have kept one eye on the threads but they have been very active and I'm just too tired to keep up, at the moment. Haven't forgotten you guys, though.

    Blue.

  4. Missing user
    Missing user avatar
    19 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hi Blue. Pleased to hear that the first (worst part) part of the root canal on your tooth has been done today.

    Not so good about the cold which is trying to take a hold on you nor the crook back which is threatening to derail you. Its all that much harder when we are trying to ward off the physical issues on top of the emotional and mental ones.

    I hope that the reduced meds are still doing as they are meant to - making your life that little bit easier.

    I havent been on here so much either the past few days, but like you, I havent forgotten you either. (-:

    Some capsicum treats for Mr Feisty and Sir Pecksalot ........ and a hug for you.

    Sherie xx

  5. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    19 July 2016 in reply to Missing user

    Thanks, Sherie. I go back to the dentist again next week. This damn anaesthetic is really giving me an appreciation for the struggles of recovering stroke sufferers, I can tell you. I got too hungry to wait for it to wear off (it's been some hours now), and eating has been quite the challenge!

    The physical stuff is a nuisance, but I'm holding up pretty well, mentally. Must be doing something right. Other than the meds, the bit of sunshine over the last few days has done wonders for my mood and motivation to do things, even if my body is struggling a bit to keep up with all my bright ideas.

    My wee birdies are enjoying the capsicum - cheers. There are treats again in the Café, including one for Holly. I think I read that you've been getting some sunshine where you are, too. Hope you're making the most of that. :)

    Blue.

  6. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    11398 posts
    20 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hi Bluguru

    Thanks for being there. Its means a lot to me. Thanks for the treats for Prince too.

    I cant stand doof doof...grr...You have more patience than I do Blue. I would like to put his stereo in a hydraulic press and make it 1mm tall :-)

    You mentioned that you have been fighting off a cold....I thought I was alone there...I mean the run down feeling....except you have had a dentist and root canal too.....ewwww

    My Best & Hugs. Paulx

    1 person found this helpful
  7. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    20 July 2016 in reply to blondguy

    I have precisely no patience at all, Paul, and would dearly love to do exactly what you suggested. What I do have, however, is the wisdom to know acting on that wouldn't work in my favour, legally speaking. I called the cops again today and he got another talking to. I could hear him yelling at them. Idiot. Cops are limited in their patience, themselves, and I'm pretty sure he's quickly heading for a fine or worse with the way things are going.

    Still feeling run down and arguing with back pain today. And the temporary filling on my bad tooth tastes horrid. I'll be having words with my dentist about that. Sorry to hear you're feeling run down, too. At least you're in good company.

    Hope Prince enjoyed his treat, and that you and he are doing as well as you can be with everything going on.

    Blue.

  8. Missing user
    Missing user avatar
    20 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hi Blue, I've been feeling a bit low and very jittery today, so apologies for not posting to your thread until now.

    I see that the neighbour has been back to his usual tricks. Hopefully sooner, rather than later, the cops will lose patience with this guy!

    Sorry that your back is still quite painful. What usually helps settle it, when it gets bad? For example - lying down with knees up, stretches, certain exercises, bed rest, lying flat on a hard surface? I recall you mentioned before that you had some exercises to do, but that you didnt often do them. I am guessing they are preventative exercises as opposed to relieving exercises.

    Pleased to hear that at least mentally you are holding up pretty well. Are you still getting good weather? We had two gorgeous days on Mon/Tues, but today its been drizzly showers most of the day. Still very warm though, so its not at all unpleasant. Just wet! And not sunny! (-:

    Hope your little feathered friends are behaving themselves and keeping you entertained. Talk again soon.

    Sherie xx

    1 person found this helpful
  9. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    11398 posts
    20 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hey Bluguru, thankyou for the reference to the other thread. You memory is dynamite. He has lost all of that and is like a lamb now. He is frightened and scared. I live about 20 minutes away but I am doing the best I can.

    I noticed that you are well read about back pain and asked about if my experience had any effect on another thread. Where is your back pain Blue? I am not an expert but experience may help :-)

    Paulx

    1 person found this helpful
  10. lookingforme
    lookingforme avatar
    666 posts
    20 July 2016 in reply to blondguy

    Hey Paul,

    From what I have been gathering, you've been going through quite a rough time. I'm sorry I haven't been around to show support like you have done for me on here. I was wondering which thread you describe all the events so I can catch up (if you don't mind me asking). I hope you're coping if not okay. The best we can hope for is coping.

    2 people found this helpful
  11. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    20 July 2016 in reply to lookingforme

    Morning all,

    Not at my best, this morning. Run-in with problem neighbour last night. He wasn't too happy about his visit from the cops, came out onto the road with his wheelie bin trying to block my exit and yelling at me when I was leaving. Things are escalating much as I thought they might, and I can't say I'm feeling especially safe right now. But I can't be intimidated into putting up with his crap, either. Can't stand all this drama, I need it to be over, to have peace in my own home. This is so damn ridiculous and I'm utterly furious.

    Sorry, will reply properly to everyone when I'm in a better frame of mind.

    Blue.

  12. Missing user
    Missing user avatar
    20 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Sorry to hear that Blue. Must be really hard with all that intimidating behaviour from the neighbour. What would happen if you took out an AVO against him? Can that even be done when he is an immediate neighbour? I hope you reported it to the police, just so they are aware of what a total idiot he is. And if it escalates further, then they will be on top of it all the way through.

    No wonder you are feeling unsafe and furious. I would be too. What a horrible situation to be forced into.

    Keep safe and let us know how today has been by the end of the day.

    Thinking of you.

    Sherie xx

    1 person found this helpful
  13. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    21 July 2016 in reply to Missing user

    So sorry to hear this Blue. Thinking of you xx

    1 person found this helpful
  14. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    21 July 2016 in reply to Lost Girl

    Thanks guys. Safe so far today. Yes, I reported the incident to the police. Nothing much they could do, though I'm given to understand restraining orders can be taken out on neighbours if things keep happening. It's a matter of keeping a record of his behaviour and calling immediately if anything more serious happens. I will keep calling police if he keeps up his racket, though he gets more irrational and problematic each time. I won't be forced to live with that. It's either put up with no sleep or deal with these tantrums. It's a no win until he pushes his luck too far with the police. This is so out of hand.

    Blue.

  15. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
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    blondguy avatar
    11398 posts
    22 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hi Bluguru...This guy really is a neanderthal. Does he annoy any other neighbors?

    You dont this crap Blue...Paulx

  16. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    22 July 2016 in reply to blondguy
    To be honest I don't know what the other neighbours think. Either way, I'm not putting up with it. If he keeps up as he has been he'll be seeing a lot more of the police.
  17. Missing user
    Missing user avatar
    23 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hi blue, just thought I'd quickly check in with you this evening. I see you've been pretty busy on your personality thread, with a few new converts. Good to see.

    Have you had any more nasty incidents with your neighbour since two days ago when he tried to block your path with a wheelie bin? What a jerk! I cant believe some people can be, firstly so inconsiderate, and secondly have such arrogance as to do what he did. I dont suppose I have to warn you to be really careful during this feud. He could try to poison animals, or do any nasty horrible thing if he's this weird. I hope he is not able to get anywhere near your little bird buddies?

    Anyway I hope you've been okay and work has been alright for you. Is the temporary tooth still bothering you with the bad taste? That must be disconcerting. I think your next dentist appointment is early next week?

    I do love your new profile picture. Willy wagtails are such lovely little birds. Always so busy and full of character.

    Okay, really only dropped in to say goodnight. Sooo ... goodnight, sleep tight. Catch you tomorrow.

    Sherie xx

    1 person found this helpful
  18. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    23 July 2016 in reply to Missing user

    Hey Sherie,

    No more incidents at this stage. Just a matter of time I expect. He's a real piece of work. I think he's acting on immediate impulses against me rather than anything thought out. No property damage or anything (at this point). He'd have to work at it and really draw a lot of attention to himself to get anywhere near the birds, though I do worry about them. He's getting a bit of a reputation with the cops as this goes on, and I can only hope they're going to get sick of it and sort him out properly.

    I'm in the bad stretch at work, and a rostering problem has come up with one of my shifts that could end up getting moved anywhere, so more stress there. Frankly, bad tasting filling is the least of my worries. The taste is less strong than it was, at least.

    Thanks for the kind words about my picture. They are pretty cute, and I got to watch those little ones grow up and take to the air. It's a privilege.

    It is nice to see my personality thread so active again. Everyone's enthusiasm has been great, and a bit of a distraction from things, which is good.

    Hope you get a good sleep tonight, Sherie. Good night.

    Blue.

  19. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    23 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hi Blue,

    I'd be livid with the neighbour too. Sorry to hear about the work roster. I hope it resolves in your favour.

    I like your pic too.

    Thanks for the personality thread. It's been a good distraction for ne.

    Carol xx

  20. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    23 July 2016 in reply to Lost Girl

    I don't think the roster will be a major problem, it's more that any stresses are magnified for me with all this crap with the neighbour putting me on edge. The situation really is beyond a joke.

    Glad you like the birdies, and that my personality thread is giving you some distraction. I hope you can pin down which type you are. Bed time for me now, but I'd like to look into it a bit at some point.

    That thread has had most of my attention tonight so haven't got to checking in on how everyone has been, on their personal threads. Hope you're starting to feel a bit better than you have been lately.

    Blue.

  21. Petra
    Petra avatar
    354 posts
    24 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hi Blue

    I see now ...the neighbour from hell. That would unsettle me too for sure. I'm not so close to neighbour's but sound travels, especially the doof doof music (double grrrrr here)! I have personally made ear plugs for such occasions. Went to a fella who sticks wet stuff in your ears, five minutes to set, and before long you have yourself a pair of fabulous anti doof doofs! I take these with me everywhere. Most useful on planes and in hotel rooms too! I understand the neighbour is at fault here though. Do keep record of the behaviours, ring the police on each episode and take extra precautions to care for you and yours during this heightened time.

    Thinking of you.

    Pet 😊 xx

  22. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    24 July 2016 in reply to Petra

    Pet, I've been dealing with this problem literally for years. I have numerous sets of ear plugs and they're just not enough. It's vibration after all, not just noise. Only thing that I've found to block it to a reasonable degree is earphones blasting utterly ridiculous levels of noise into my ears, which is pretty obviously quite bad for my hearing and leaves my ears ringing. Considering he's across the road and not even next door there's no reason I should be hearing his noise at all, let alone for it to be that disruptive. I'm keeping the cops informed and being careful.

    Thanks for checking in on me.

    Blue.

    1 person found this helpful
  23. Petra
    Petra avatar
    354 posts
    24 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Bummer (can I say that)?

    Years? Have the Police let this go on for years?

    I feel for you. Ear plugs won't help much then.

    Thinking of you.

    Pet xx

  24. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    24 July 2016 in reply to Petra

    Bummer is an understatement, but not at all inappropriate. No, I didn't involve the police until recently. I had bigger problems to tackle first and was extremely reluctant to do something as dramatic as involving police in domestic matters. Tried talking to him (there were tantrums). Tried talking to his parents (he lives with them, though he's at least 30); minus the swearing, they were close to as bad. So police it is. I suspected things would drag on and escalate, and that's exactly what's happening. All I want is peace in my own home, especially after the huge struggle to keep the house after I split with the ex (selling would have likely left me worse off and with the added stress of moving). Apparently I don't get to have that.

    Blue.

  25. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    25 July 2016

    Hey Blue,

    So sorry you're having to deal with that horrid neighbour and having to involve the police would also be challenging and upsetting. I wish it were easier for you. You are right you deserve some peace.

    I found something that might appeal to your sense of humour. Google "justin's floodlight", it should be the first hit

    Carol

  26. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    25 July 2016 in reply to Lost Girl

    Ha. Doubt that would be worth trying with my neighbour though. The odds of him being able to read aren't great. I'm extra exhausted from work tonight, and have to be back there at 5am, so probably won't be around the threads much, tonight. Will have to check in on them a bit later. Hope you're doing okay (and everyone else who visits here, too).

    Blue.

  27. Missing user
    Missing user avatar
    26 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hi Blue. It sounds like you've had a couple of busy days at work, and I also read that you had no water when you got home from work today. What a bummer!

    Anyway as I hadnt been on here for a few days, I just wanted to drop by and let you know that I have been thinking of you. Even if I havent been on the forums very much the past few days. I have just been feeling really worn out both mentally and physically, and everything seems to be an effort lately. So I dont feel as though I am achieving much lately. I had work today, and just got through the essentials before coming home and crashing out on the lounge. But thats fairly typical of how I've felt the past few days.

    You must have stage 2 of the dental treatment soon? When will you know the results of your new roster changes?

    I'm glad to hear that you are taking every precaution possible against the potential dangers that the neighbour from hell poses. But do please continue to take care, you just never know with these characters!

    Okay must go, although its only 10pm, I think I will head off to bed now. And my apologies if this post is a little 'all over the place', its kind of the way I feel right now. I'm okay, just feeling somewhat 'scatterbrained' I think is an appropriate word.

    Talk soon. Nite ....

    Sherie xx

  28. Blue's Clues
    Blue's Clues avatar
    2299 posts
    26 July 2016 in reply to Missing user

    Hey Sherie,

    Yup, work has been pretty full on. That floating shift got tacked onto my hours in Fruit today, so I got to be in my preferred department and not have my hours spread over any more days. I'm pleased about that, and it means tomorrow's shift is short, then I have a handful of days off (there have been a few changes this week with one guy on leave, and someone else sick). So, tired though I am, it's not a bad thing.

    The water is back on again, and I've had a bubble bath. I feel a bit revived, and am now enjoying Mr Feisty's company. He is in his accustomed position upon my head.

    Next dentist appointment is tomorrow, which is good because the temporary filling seems to be degrading a bit. Not sure how many appointments to go. And thinking of appointments, finally found a psychologist, and will be seeing him in a couple of weeks. About bloody time.

    Don't worry, I'm taking care, and always have my phone close at hand to call the cops if I need them.

    You've had a lot going on lately, so I hope you're not being too hard on yourself about not feeling like you're achieving much. Sometimes you just need to take a breather and not push yourself too hard. As my mum would say, "be a human being, not a human doing". I hope you get a good sleep, and can spend some time just relaxing or maybe even pampering yourself a little. I reckon you deserve it.

    Blue.

    2 people found this helpful
  29. Petra
    Petra avatar
    354 posts
    26 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Blue! I love your mum's saying.....

    So very true, so very apt.

    Pet xx

  30. blondguy
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    11398 posts
    27 July 2016 in reply to Blue's Clues

    Hey Bluguru, I see that you went to the dentist yesterday...I actually had to track your thread as it had disappeared on me. Just sticking my beak into your business and seeing how you have been. Let me know when you need me to destroy your neighbors stereo

    Just a ((Hug)) for you

    Paulxx

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