Hey there dear Doolsy 🤗 and all 👋

Just popping in to say hi and see how you're getting on hun ☺

I bought a gluten free, you guessed it choccy 🍫 cake and am putting the kettle on. If you're not up to talking that's ok your many friends and I can just hold your 🤝 hands hug you and look after you. We can chat amongst ourselves and you'll be amongst friends. You might even feel some of our energy.

I really hope you're at least feeling a little brighter and getting sound sleep.

You're in my thoughts and worried about you Mrs Doolsy

You'd no doubt know this too, it takes time pulling back up and seems an endless battle but it's one we can win. You have so often before and can again.

A worthwhile one though because after where you are/have been it's so so good feeling in control more and less pain.

I very much hope you're safe and getting as much help and rest that you can

You're never alone here Doolsy and always cared about and loved.

Keep going hun no matter how hard please don't give up because there really is better than this.

⚘💗

Hi Mrs D ❤

Just wanted to pop in and ask how you are holding up today? It's ok if you're not up to replying, goodness knows I understand that feeling. You know we care about you but it's nice to be reminded sometimes.

Is it gardening weather for you? I was wondering if you've ever tried making planters out of old tyres? Our local mechanic gives tyres away (they have to pay to get rid of them) and I'm enjoying painting them then planting flowers. Saw a photo of a wishing well planter which is on my "to try" list.

I'm waffling but hopefull that you have found a few projects that distract you when it all feels too much.

Looking forward to July. Big hug from me.

Love Nat

Mrs Dools

I feel like I am in a comforting queue that is full of understanding for you. Nat and DB, have said what I am thinking too.

You are held in high esteem here.

I am glad you are taking time away from the forum and I hope that helps you.

Quirky

Dearest Mrs Dools...

So many people here love and care for you heaps..That’s testament to what a beautiful caring lovely inspirational person you are...Please don’t let beasty tell you any different....

Where all sitting with you holding your hands in our hearts precious lady....

I can’t add any more to the amazingly caring posts from your friends here..but I would like to give you my love and prayers for your journey out of this downer and into a more lighter place...

Sending you some love, care and some gentle caring hugs..

Grandy..

Dear Deebi, Grandy, Quirky and Nat,

Thank you so much for all your kind comments.

My mind feels really overwhelmed and my soul tortured at the moment.

I'm trying to move on. At times it is so darn hard.

I have been out in the garden now and then. It is a good thing I can't get the chainsaw started as I don't think we would have any trees or bushes left! The hand saw is hard work!

We have had some rain, but the soil is still like powder here. Hasn't stopped the weeds from growing though.

I'm trying to keep up with my volunteer work and the groups I attend. Didn't do much last week though. Guess that is okay now and then.

I see my Dr tomorrow after waiting over a month for an appointment.

Still trying to make an appointment for a gastro specialist! Has taken 3 Drs appointments and many phone calls!Maybe my phone call today will be successful and I will at least be able to make an appointment to see the specialist!

Stupid thing is I could have booked in a colonoscopy for next month without having even seen the specialist!

Anyone got nothing to do next month, I know where you can have a colonoscopy done just for the fun of it!

Good to see you Doolsy 🤗 hi everyone ☺

A gorgeous little elderly lady one day who I was nursing. I'm not sure who made the joke and we laughed. Her words of wisdom I'll never forget.

"Never lose your sense of humour"

Amazing lady amidst how you're feeling you still can see the funny side of life. I laughed at the image of the trees 😂 can just see the sticks that once were. They'd turn into Weeping Willows 😅

Hun your lights dull at the moment but the fires 🔥 still burning. Hold onto it darl.

I've been racking my brain how in the last few mths I've pulled up enough to get through from where you are. The more I think I think it was firm no nonsense self talk. " I don't want to feel this way, it'll pass, I CAN and will get out of this".

Doolsy I had lunch with a besty yesterday, had as always a really good day. I've been thinking to go a tiny radical with a hair style, she cut my hair looks good. Are you in a position you could get your hair done, it's uplifting.

Mind you I've got a shocker of a bed head atm 😨 looking in parts like my hairs been electrocuted at every angle. She told me about a make shift gel, water and sugar to make a sticky substance. If I'm walking around with an ant 🐜 nest in my head I'll know why.

Oh thanks for the colonoscopy offer but might pass this time 😄

Darl are you up to ringing here or lifeline. Alternatively do you think it could help to write down how you feel, difficult very in this headspace but not impossible to think about why you feel so bad without feeling it. I'm in nappies with this but had some success by as soon as I feel sadness rise to a thought I say ..

no.. then some deep breaths only focusing on that..then same only focus objectively on the task at hand.

Everytime we acknowledge how we feel which that parts ok but not when it makes us feel emotional and depressed. What can we do about it.

You're an incredible lady Mrs Doolsy I truly am so sorry you're hurting so much and have so much frustration to deal with.

I'm looking at your GP appt as a new leaf being turned. Tell them everything Doolsy lovey, at this stage you need as much help as you can get.

You always will have strong support love and care in this community dear friend. We and many people in real life need you.

Thanks for being in touch.

🤗⚘🌱

Hi Deebi,

I tried to leave a message here this morning and the computer froze!

Thanks for all your positivity and help, you and so many others have certainly helped me through this "interesting time".

I have been telling myself I don't want to feel this way. I have been doing a lot of writing in my journal and that has helped to get some of the muck out of my head.

I am trying to realise there are some battles I just can't fight. I have to leave some things alone and do my best.

Tomorrow I will be home all day, might do some gardening if it is not raining. I will work on some positive pages in my journal.

We are also having people here for lunch on Saturday so I will do some preparation for that.

Some of the horridness has dissipated thankfully, now I just feel exhausted. That is a lot better than drowning!

We had a few laughs in the Op Shop today so that was lovely.

Cheers to you Deebi and to all reading, from Dools

Heya Doolsy lovely and everyone ☺

You're very welcome dear lady ☺

That's incredibly good hearing you're starting to pull through. It takes time and yes the exhaustion's a huge part of our difficulty in these times.

Good on you going to the op shop awesome a few laughs helps no end. And Saturday sounds good too.

Well done writing in your journal I'm so pleased it helped get some muck out. It gets overwhelming doesn't it. Also what keeps me going is I know it'll pass of course at the time it doesn't possibly seem it can.

Hope the weather allowed you some time in the garden. I'm growing on the window sill a miniature pig face, just a weed but so pretty the little vibrant Pink flowers it's going fine in water. No idea where I'll put it 😆

You've been in my thoughts often lady 😊

Keep on keeping on darl. I've been researching more about BPD which I think I also have and did you know there's ways of working through it which is good to hear. Nothings an overnight but is encouraging.

Ok lovely lady sending love care and a scrumptious no calorie Gluten free Marble Madera cake with icing of course. Not sure what flavour to put on it.

Be very gentle with yourself dear lady.

🤗⚘🌱 new beginnings 🕊

Hopefully your poor body will let you rest properly now, it's phenomenal how long we can go without near enough sleep until the bod finally says ok.

Hi Deebi,

Thanks again for your kindness and sharing here.

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) can be quite complex! Usually I have it under control. I have a Dialectical Behaviour Therapy Skills Book (DBT) that I need to actually read and work through instead of moving it from one room to another!

I will try and read some of it today and re-start some of the exercises in it.

I'm reminding myself I have no control over what other people do either. The employment lady said she organised to chat to my Dr. I saw my Dr and he said he had never heard of her. I contacted her and she said she has a phone appointment booked for Tuesday with the Dr. Had one booked this week and it was cancelled.

With all the modern technology these days why is it still so hard for professionals to connect with each other?

I'm going to try and find a balance today of doing jobs that need to be done, working on improving my mental health and enjoyment.

Getting out into the garden is something I hope to do as well. With 5 acres there is a lot to look at! I just need to remind myself I can only manage what I can out there with the limited resources I have.

The larger variety of pig face grew in the region where I was a child. It always amazed me how hardy it was, growing in sandy soil right on the coast. The flowers are so bright and cheerful. Hope you continue to enjoy your plant Deebi!

Hope you have a lovely day Deebi!

Cheers to you and to all, from Dools

Dearest Lovely Mrs Dools 🌷..

Im just calling in today to say hello and wish you a beautiful sunny/rainy day today...I’m not sure what the weather is doing where you live...

How are you feeling precious lady?

The week ends come around so quickly don’t they..although everyday except Tuesday is a day at home for me...

I have tried to grow pig faces a few times and failed at doing so....I might try what our beautiful Deebi has done an put them first....I like so much the deep brilliant maroon coloured one the best.....a few people have them growing here..my thumb is any other colour then green....😂...

I have so many self help books under my coffee table on a little ledge that I read occasionally...I start to read then after a few minutes ..poof my concentration disappears...I will have to try harder....I think it is a great help the books explaining about our mh and the best ways to manage them....I hope you manage to read some of your book on BPD...and find something in the pages to help you....

5 acres is a lot of yard...I had 8 acres and had a goat as my lawn mower...and he (Billy) kept the grass down so well..unfortunately billy was an escape artist and would get out and go running down through the town looking for his friend a donkey..in the end I gave Billy to donkeys owner...and they are living happily ever after...😂..

I hope today you are feeling better then yesterday lovely friend...and you have some light in you and today...

Keep choosing beasty off like we do the annoying flys....eventually it will get sick of trying...and run away....Wishing thinking I know...but...if we give up trying beasty wins...

Love and warm caring hugs dear Mrs Dools....

Grandy

Hi Grandy,

Thanks for dropping in! We had some much needed rain yesterday and it might rain again later today. The dirt has turned to mud in the gutters! We have not made the time or effort to clean them out.

I'd like to have a pet goat, preferably one with three legs so it can't escape! Ha. Ha. There is no feed here in the summer though so it could become expensive. Good to know your goat has a friend, sorry you had to give your goat up though!

I think it would be good if the town had a goat! It could be tethered to various places for a couple of hours each day, then allowed to run free in someone's yard until the next day.

I've been struggling a little and find the least little thing tips me over at present. Trying to find ways to rest and build up my resilience again.

Trying to remember to look for the good in life!

I've not read much of that book so want to make time to do that. I sometimes jot down some of the good points and put them in my journal and underline them in bright colours.

Hope you are doing okay Grandy! All the best with every aspect of your health.

Cheers to you all from Dools

Dearest Mrs Dools...

I like your idea of jotting down good helpful parts of your book...I find it hard to read..I have no concentration read..my mind wanders away from my book....I have discovered audio books and I find I can listen to someone else telling me a story....

I can relate so much to little things tipping you over...I have been researching self talk..(our beautiful Deebi does that)..Apparently it’s one of our strongest coping tools...and supposed to work really good....maybe when you start hearing those niggles of depression coming on tell it no go away..or no I’m not listening..and find something to do to occupy your mind that you like doing...I start doing colour by numbers on my iPad..I didn’t like it at first, but I preserved and now enjoy it enough to loose my negative thoughts in it..maybe that’s something you could try?...idk just thought...

Im pleased you got rain...we had a few drops the other day and within 10 minutes the rain dried up and the wet dirt is nothing but dust again....

I hope today bring you some light precious lady...and your mind finds some peace....

Sending you some love and hugs precious lady....💜🤗..and a rainbow..because they are so pretty and to me full of hope..🌈..

Take care of you beautiful friend...

Grandy..

Mrs Dools and everyone reading,

I like your idea of copying out words from a book that have meaning for you. I have done that but not used colour, that sounds like a good idea.

Like, Grandy, I too can relate to that feeling of the least little thing thing tippingnobe over yet at other times we can cope with bug things in our stride. That is strange but depends on our mood.

Grandy , I don’t do self talk as I have my inner critic so there can be lots of noise but I do write letters or even emails to myself so I can try to make sense of my thoughts and actions.

I am sitting in the morning sun in bed when I should have been up ages ago, guess my shop will have a late opening today, My idea of self care!

kind thoughts to all ,

Quirky

Hi Grandy, Quirky and All,

Thanks for your comments here ladies, always appreciated.

I've not listened to a talking book before, sounds like a great way though to keep your mind occupied and distracted. Might give one a try sometime. Grandy, do you prefer listening to a male or female narrator?

I do find it helpful to write down those helpful bits from books.

I have also started up another page for nice little moments, like the kangaroos I saw while out driving recently, the kookaburra that sang in a tree near our kitchen window and the glorious sun set colours.

I'm trying really hard to accept and move on those negative thoughts.

Sometimes it is like the "Feelings" of gloom are there, with out any thoughts having triggered them. Guess I have to work on that as well.

Tomorrow I will be in the home for the elderly, so hopefully I will have some laughs there.

Cheers all from Dools

Dearest Mrs Dools🌷...

Just popping in to wish you a beautiful day today with your volunteer day with the elderly people....I hope you get as much light today as I know you would give your young at heart beautiful elderly....

love and hugs...lovely Mrs Dools....💖🤗.

Grandy....

Dear Grandy,

Thank you as always lovely lady. I had a great day yesterday in the home for the elderly. I helped out with some craft in the morning, that is always a lot of fun. The ladies who organise the craft session are wonderful.

In the afternoon I took some balls and bean bags into an area and had people whacking the balls around. There were so many laughs, it was wonderful.

Yes Grandy, I was having as much fun as the residents were and so enjoyed being able to offer them an opportunity for some pleasure as well.

The sun is supposed to be shining today so I will go for a walk. The birds are chirping, greeting the early morning.

I just need to get my mind to sing for joy like the birds and that will be a great start for every day!

Cheers to you Grandy and to all from Dools

Hello Mrs Dools...

Your post is so very heartwarming hearing that you and the elderly people were laughing...I can safely say for today that.... Mrs Dools 1..beasty a Big 0..Well done lovely lady.🤗..Giving yourself and your time with so much love and care to the beautiful people their is gold...You are making their lives a lot better....

Did you go for a walk today?....I tried but couldn’t...I will again one day soon....

Animals seem to live each minute of their days so mindfully....I’m lucky that I have heaps of birds around my place and can hear them daily greeting their new day with joy....I often sit on my veranda and watch them playing..the funniest thing I see is they sit on a dry dirt patch and wash themselves in it...dust going everywhere...it only takes one then they all join in...maybe it’s to cold to wash in the water bath I have for them.....

Your doing really well dear friend...You’re an inspiration to me to keep on keeping on ....like you do....🤗...Thank you for the lovely person you are...

Good night...I hope you sleep good tonight and dream Peacefully...

Love and comfy hugs💜🤗

Grandy..

Hi Grandy and all reading,

Hope you have managed to get out in the garden or have been for a walk. I have done both recently. Didn't go for a walk today but spent some time weeding and also gathering up more sticks.

When I have appointments in different towns, I like to have a walk around the streets or along a creek if there is one. I was little surprised to see one creek that usually has water was so dry even this time of year! At times that creek has flooded quite high in the past.

I'm thinking of other ideas I can implement with the equipment that is available at the home for the elderly. The ladies were having such a laugh, it was wonderful.

Some days are better than others aren't they Grandy! As the sun has been shining today, I have tried to enjoy being outdoors for a while.

Tomorrow it may be raining so that might be a day to read, work on my journal or be creative some other way.

Hope everyone finds the inner strength they need to keep going!

Cheers all from Dools

Hello Mrs Dools...

Thank you for asking...I did wLk to my friends place on Saturday but she wasn’t home so I continued walking to the highway..then back home...The next day I walked again to hers and stopped in for a pot of tea, cake and some chatting.....

We had a bit of rain last night and a misty sort of day....could have been sleet..,

I wish I could walk around the bigger towns when I go...It’s to daunting for me to do that....I know there’s a beautiful river in the bigger town...I remember the hospital taking a few of us out for a few hours to the river.....Maybe one day..

Our dam out here is so sad...it’s only around 2% full...it’s water capacity is more the Sydney harbour...The experts are saying it will dry up around Christmas if we don’t get some proper rain....Not sure what will happen to this little village if it does.....

I think it’s beautiful you having laughs with the elderly...and trying to find different ways of giving them some fun....What a beautiful caring person you are Mrs Dools....I wish you good luck in finding something fun to do with the equipment you have their at the nursing home.....

Youre so right Mrs Dools..some days are better then other days...I feel that no matter how we are feeling we can only try our best to have the best possible day no matter how the weather is...

I hope your day was good Mrs Dools...and everyone else’s day as well....

Kind thoughts, love and hugs..💜🤗.

Grandy..

Hi Grandy,

Thanks for sharing. We are supposed to be getting a storm here later today so will see what happens. Had to drop my husband off at 6.00 a.m. to pick up the work van and reversed into a fence! Not quite what I needed this morning. Will check the car out for damage later.

I'm trying to deal with this darn depression, some days it is so horrid.

Had an appointment with a new psychologist. He told me I have to help myself. I know that, but when you are so low that is hard to do.

I'm tired Grandy! Maybe I will just stay home and snooze all day.

Cheers from Dools

Mrs Dools, waves to Grandy, and to all reading ,

As I read your post, I am sitting in bed trying to motivate myself to get up in the cold!

A day of snoozing sounds wonderful. I saw a post once on FB about how resting when you are tired is a good way of looking after yourself.

I think seeing a psychologist is helping yourself .

Maybe we should have a national snooze day !

I see that you are always trying to find ways to help yourself and of course some times it is so hard but you keep trying and I admire that in you.

Quirky

Hi Quirky,

To be honest, I have just about had enough! Why keep trying? Wouldn't it be easier to just give up?

I don't want to be doing this same battle all of the time. I am tired Quirky!

I'm trying to keep busy with washing and housework then plan to read for a while and maybe go out in the garden.

Then what? What have I really achieved? Another day of nothing!

Ah sorry Quirky and all. My mind is tired. I am exhausted.

Cheers from Dools

Mrs Dools,

NO need to be sorry, you are fed up and exhausted from trying.

I feel the medical system has let you down. You keep trying but are not getting the help and support you need.

I can feel your frustration and hoped I had an answer.

Take care

Quirky

Hey Quirky,

Thanks.

Hello Mrs Dools 🌷..

Oh Mrs Dools you have achieved a lot .washing , housework gardening..sweetheart that’s a lot..even if you don’t think it is.,.it really is...

Mrs Dools..I wake up daily to an empty house...Sometimes I can accept that and I’m okay..but mostly my thoughts are why am I here..I don’t make any difference...What am I to do with me today...Mostly I go back to bed in tears fighting myself because who cares if I’m here or not...Why am I here....no one really cares....no one really..except for the people here...Whom I’ve grown to love and are now my family....you included dear lady..your important to me...you have pulled me up many many times with your encouragement, strength, kindness, humour, and determination...Thank you so much...Please believe me when I say that you are so much needed by so many people whom you’ve never met that love and care for you so much....That is one reason to keep trying sweetheart..we are also that much better because of your love and care you give of yourself to us..here on these forums...We love you Mrs Dools...

I am learning that...we are here..on this universe to enjoy the beautiful universe god has created for us, first....Please try as hard as you can to take time out of your day to sit outside and do nothing but blend in with the universe around you..I feel being mindful in nature helps to balance out our soul...I believe that god has given this beautiful world for us..so that we can take some time out to watch, see, listen, feel it all to balance our soul..

You give yourself so selfless to the elderly at the nursing home, you give them some laughs and care when you’re their...they are probably looking forward to seeing you each week...You’re giving them some joy in their twilight years...that’s special and your a special person...The op shop, you greet your customers and chat with them, you could be the only person they talk to on that day...you even play with the little children and brighten up their day as well...Mrs Dools..precious lady...you are achieving so much, and giving yourself to a lot of people...and making their day shine because you were a part of it....

Please...be alright dear lady...and be very gentle on you..it is worth it..to keep trying...

You are very much loved and cared for precious lady...by a lot of people....that would be something you could put in your positive journal..because you positively have made a difference in our lives..

Love and hugs precious friend..💖🤗.

Grandy.

Dear Grandy,

Thanks for your kind words and encouragement. It means a lot to me. This forum is a very special place isn't it!

It can be hard to work out how to get through a day, what will help you to move on, what might offer a sense of meaning and purpose to you day.

Like you mentioned, sitting outside and bonding with nature helps. I did most of my bonding with nature from inside yesterday! It was blowing a gale here all day.

My time out in nature was when I was untangling the washing from the clothesline!

Today my mind will hopefully be too busy to be able to think much negative stuff. I have a couple of appointments to attend, will be at the Op Shop for a little while then have to attend some training for the home for the elderly.

The wind is still raging out there. Maybe I will go and stand in the wind for a while and let it refresh me!

Hope you have some plans for today Grandy!

Cheers and hugs to you dear lady from Dools

Hi Everyone,

Yesterday was busy going from here to there. I had a late appointment with my Dr. That guy deserves a gold star. Actually he deserves a million gold stars! He helps me to still be here.

I'm wanting to change my life around. I have had a life time of this depression and other mental health issues. I have tried fighting it, accepting it, ignoring it and trying to work with it.

I know that I have so much to be thankful for, at times I just don't see it or find it hard to recognise.

How can our minds deteriorate so very quickly, sometimes for no know reason? The human brain is amazing! It can also be so darn confusing at times!

Before me is a new day. What will I do with it?

I do have to drive almost an hour to Centrelink to lodge some forms! That process might take me a couple of hours...not the driving but the waiting to lodge the forms! That could be at least 4 hours in total just trying to do that.

Maybe I will take a thermos and a book with me!

Hope you all have some plans for your day!

Cheers from Dools

Hi All,

I just received a message stating an older couple I know have just lost their home, car and everything they own to a fire. All they have is the clothes they are wearing.

My mind is trying to visualise what it is like for them.

I'm trying to put my depression into perspective. My issues are nothing compared to what they face!

How can mental health issues be so consuming when for me there are not huge issues like this to be dealt with, just trying to live each day.

It doesn't make sense.

Cheers all from Dools

Hello Mrs Dools..

Im really sorry to that..Thats so sad....my heart goes out to them....I hope so much that they are both okay🤗..

How are you feeling Mrs Dools?..

Life can be hard..very hard..and I’ll agree with you it’s not fair...and doesn’t make sense...

Just know sweet precious lady that I’m sitting you and hope that you are doing okay....

Mental health is so all consuming to the person struggling with it...

Mrs Dools...you’re strong within your soul...I wish that one day we all can have control of our minds....Living daily in the moment is hard but do able...If we could live only minute by minute in the here and now.eventually we will find peace....Precious lady just keep taking those baby steps dear friend...you’re doing a good job.,,I’m proud of you...

Sending you my love and some warm hugs...to a beautiful lady...💖🤗..

Grandy..

Hi there Grandy,

I went to visit these people the other day. They have temporarily moved in with a son and daughter in law. It is amazing they are safe! It could have a real tragedy if they had perished in the fire.

Guess there is always something to be thankful for.

Today there were a few little issues at the place where I volunteer. I was able to ask myself if it was worth making a big issue out of what was happening or to find a way to let it go. I managed to let most of it go.

My husband came home from grocery shopping. All the meat has gluten in it. I asked if he had checked and he said he forgot. Guess I will be eating Vegetarian this week!

I can pop into the shops and purchase some meat I can eat when I am next in town if I really want some. Another little issue that is easily sorted and not worth making a fuss over.

While thinking about all the jobs that need doing around here, I was feeling a bit frustrated, then I was thinking of my friends who no longer have a house, along with millions of other people around the world and I decided to be thankful I had jobs to do!

Our minds can take us on quite a journey! I am going to try and retrain mine to take the thankfulness path!

On the not so good days, I am going to try more acceptance!

Hope you are doing okay Grandy.

Cheers to you and thanks for dropping by!

Cheers from Dools