I wrote a long reply and then the site crashed when I clicked post, so not sure if it worked. Attempt 2
Dont worry mate. We all get mental blocks. One day you can write an epic battle in an 1 hour, the next you take 3 weeks to figure out how to get a character to walk across a room. If you do not get it finished straight away, thats fine. Take your time. Just keep working on it. That is the main thing. Do not give up on it. We all get writers block, especially me.
I've always believe that you should do what makes you happy, not what pays the most. I believe you should continue to work towards the career that makes you happiest the most. Money will never be able to buy that. Finding jobs is really hard. I too am struggling. I get put off to apply though because of the constant rejection and the arduous hours and effort you need to put in to applying for a job that gives you no happiness. Some of the recruitment processes are longer than a university course.
Sorry if i dont go into detail about the addictions. I feel like i have come along way with it and if i focus on them, I can fall back in to it. I fell in with a bad crowd and fell the wrong way with some decisions. Used to be quite the sportsman back in the day too. Still have the traits, but the moment is gone.
Definitely lots of compounding. It's not weird. When I broke up with my ex I thought I was the only one in the world. Everyone told me to get over her and move on. I felt so alone like no one else existed. Then you said your story and I realised I was not. Other people are going through the same thing and finally I had someone i could not just relate to, but feel comfortable. I felt like I could fight through this and overcome this.
I feel like I have come some way, but that it is only about 5% of the way, which is not much at all. I would like to think that one day I will, but despite their being a flicker in the light now, I still often dont really see the light. Hopefully you are right though. Heartbreak hurts way too much.
I am excited for it. Looking forward to it. Just want to escape from work and the stress. Hope it will do me some good. Kind of worried that I will come back and just fall in to this pain.
I'm going to try and use this break to refresh, so not taking my laptop and such. Kind of disconnecting a bit, so if I do not respond to you and spd, i am so sorry. I already am looking forward to talking to you guys when I get back, but thought id give a heads up.