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Forums / Long term support over the journey / I always do things ass about

Topic: I always do things ass about

  1. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    13 September 2017

    My first introduction thread after being here FOREVER..... because I always do things backwards...

    Velvz. Bipolar.... type? Not sure. I walked out of the psychiatrists office the day he tried putting me on more meds. That was a decade ago.

    Anxiety issues. OCD issues. Occasional SH concerns. Checkered history of substance abuse.

    I manage for the most part by exercising, good healthy food and good sleep practices. Substances these days are 3 drinks maximum and I'm rat assed.

    I work full time. Study part time. Bought my own house years ago. On my own. Ok the bank helped lol!!! Most days for me are 10-14 hours depending. That's work and study and house things and exercise.

    At the moment I'm struggling because I believe I've burnt myself out and pushed myself into hypomania. I'm all over the shop. Been here before but no psychosis stuff. Woo.

    Oh man I don't know what else to say. No kids. Love kids. But conscious decision not to have my own. Love men. But sadly I'm intolerant to relationships after a while. Moody 😁😁

    Animals and music are my passions.

    Yeh so..... **** awkward silence***

    velvz.

    4 people found this helpful
  2. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    13 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Now I can find you.

    💓💗💖💘💕💞💓💗❤️💞💖💗💓

    1 person found this helpful
  3. Peppermintbach
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    Peppermintbach avatar
    4566 posts
    13 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hi Velv,

    I have seen you around the forums. She of the wonderful sense of humour with a bold, independent, spirited streak that comes across in your posts.

    Just say what you want to say and pause when/if you feel like it too; it's your thread ;)

    I totally hear you on music and animals being your life's passions. With you 100% on both counts!

    Pepper xo

  4. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    13 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    Oh, enjoy all your friends that are about to come to you.

    I could squeeze you to pieces.

  5. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    13 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    Aweeee pepper and Dory thank you.

    **blush**

    yeh I read your hint in class this am Dory and chuckled... took all day to do this because of feeling so yukky.

    I did very little in class too lol.... way too Blaryhhhh feeling.

    your squishes are appreciated and returned squishy like

    hshahaahhaa

    1 person found this helpful
  6. Guest_3712
    Guest_3712 avatar
    2003 posts
    13 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hey Velvet my friend

    Wow your own thread ! So Dory finally wore you down - she's a persuasive little 🐟

    Nice to know a bit more about you - but already knew all I needed to- kind , compassionate, funny, animal lover ✅✅✅✅

    ❤️💛💚💙💜

    1 person found this helpful
  7. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    13 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    It's so good to know you are a nuta(ok fishing spelling)

    like us 🤣😂🤗🤣😂

    ok I will try and be fishing normal 🐸

    You are not a yucca plant ,

    This old fart is going to bed.

    You have made my week.

  8. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    13 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    Thank you Dory for believing in me.

    Im having a rant. I'm sick to F..... of being a "good friend" (direct quote from last night) to people when no one is there for me.

    I listened and helped a friend last night for 2 hours on the phone. While earlier this week she ignored my little reach out.

    i mean SERIOUSLY.... next time "who cares" will come out of my mouth. No one knows or cares to F ing know what I'm going through this week. Bad meds - ditched today. A virus. Plus life stuff. Plus my bf hurt me and angered me beyond belief.

    F today!!!

    v.

  9. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    14 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    You make me smile Dory because we seem similar.

    I had a rant here this am. No sign of it. Must've been too non PC.

    Meh.

    V.

  10. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    14 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Well fry me too,

    I just wrote an epic and deleted it💩

    Gotta cook tea for all my mongo family,

    I be back

  11. Guest_3712
    Guest_3712 avatar
    2003 posts
    14 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    Love u guys

    See u in the Circle Later for RU OK posts

    Stressless or as Dory says

    Stress and Less😂

  12. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    14 September 2017 in reply to Guest_3712

    Mongo family?

    LOL DORY LOL!!

    ok crawling over.....

  13. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    14 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    And Thankyou for believing in me.😊

    Have I ever said that I can not stand me me me me me me me people! They are the biggest tools on earth,and have no flying idea about life! They are usually the others.

    What's doing with the bad meds and ditching????????

    What your computer has a virus???????

    Ass bf did what????????

    Life stuff, give it to me baby??????

    Dory

  14. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    14 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    I read that one of yours and smiled. I'm naturally a nurturer, carer, helper. Misplaced maternal instinct lol!!! I help tools thinking , ah they not like this all the time. WRONG. 😂

    i have a virus. Bastard thing.

    Meds were counter productive.

    Bf - pfffffttt he's got depression and sadly is yet to help himself. I want to help him when he is ready.

    life stuff - busy busy work tafe exams ARGGHG LOL... helped with some work today subject to quarantine. Was interesting stuff.

    I collect macabre things... found another bird skull for my collection today. Yes. I'm strange.

    V.

  15. Quercus
    Champion Alumni
    • Community champion volunteers who are not currently active on the forums.
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Quercus avatar
    3544 posts
    14 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hi Velvet 😊

    Just had to throw in a hello so that I can find you easier once I get back from my road trip tomorrow.

    I'm so glad you have your own thread. Now I can watch you and Dory crack everyone up. You've made my day.

    As to the 'friend' if she ignores you and is selfish then she's not much of a friend hey. Time to find some new friends.

    You never fail to remind me of my sister... She is a kick ass woman with a big heart of absolute gold who speaks her mind too. This is a fantastic thing! Stuff the PC celebrate foot in mouth disease 😊😊😊.

    ❤ Nat

  16. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    14 September 2017 in reply to Quercus

    I just woke up. I'm smiley. You guys made my morning.

    Its Friday too 😁😁😁😁

    Bad meds are gone I feel better.

    I have had a virus. Bugs graaarr !!!

    BF - stupid dumb boy who thinks only of his own selfish needs. We are on talking terms again though. Lol... Also he has depression he admits... he's just bee in denial for 2 decades.

    Its brekky time!!!!

    v.

  17. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    15 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Oh Vel I just wet my pants

    Awsome dude, I was about to say whats macawhatever and then saw bones, oh how exciting, Don't know if you know that I go hunting so all weird and wonderful things. We have a few animals around. Crap gold hunting too🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🐡🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

    Tell that lucky bf to wake up or lookout for a blue fish coming.

    Dory

  18. Guest_3712
    Guest_3712 avatar
    2003 posts
    15 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    I so know where to look if I need cheering up- you guys crack me up every time !

    Not really into all the macabre things you guys are, I actually have trouble with live creepy things let alone dead ones, however I appreciate we all have different interests so as long as you look out for me and don't do any scary things - all good !

    Drop by the Circle later, some folk there need some cheering up

    Stressless

    1 person found this helpful
  19. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    15 September 2017 in reply to Guest_3712

    You guys rock my world :D

    HEHEH. Dory he will get my boot is his ass first...

    Going to circle......

    V.

    1 person found this helpful
  20. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    16 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    I think my relationship is broken. I can't sleep. I'm sick of repairing it. I feel taken for granted. I'm sick of arguing and not feeling loved / wanted / valued. He knows this. He knows I'm at end point. He doesn't know what to do either. He says aaaaallll the things - I love you, I want you in my life, I want a future with you.

    Im starting to believe it's all lies. But, it's not like he's getting anything out of me at the moment.

    Must. Sleep.

  21. Guest_3712
    Guest_3712 avatar
    2003 posts
    16 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hey Velvet,

    I'm so sorry. I know the feeling of despair and hopelessness of trying to work at a relationship that doesn't work. I guess you just need to ask yourself is it worth fighting for still ? Has it got a future ? Are you making each other happy ?

    Lots of questions, only you have the answers

    thinking of you my dear friend

    Stressless

  22. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    16 September 2017 in reply to Guest_3712

    Thanks Stressless. I know I'm over thinking things. That Doesn't help.

    v.

  23. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    17 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hey Vel,

    Maybe give him an ultimation(spelling)

    If you love me(you) you would get help to make us BOTH happy. I am willing to help you,but if things don't change for the better,then we will have to go our separate ways.

    Dory😘

  24. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    17 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    Understood

    👍

  25. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    17 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Vel how u doin?

    What did you get up to today?

    Dory

  26. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    17 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    Hey Dory,

    I went to the gym. Then went to friends place on train because I was sad. Mini meltdown on train lots of tears. At friends chilled with tea, the kids and a dart or two (when extremely stressed I'll have a cig).

    Decided ok to go home. Saw a few domestic angry violent things on way home that scared me.

    Got home baked a cake and had a vodka.

    During this chatted to man thing. We finding understanding. Which is nice. I think I have ptsd as well that's not been addressed.

    PHEW LOL!

    how about you?

  27. Guest_128
    Guest_128 avatar
    2143 posts
    17 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hey my friend,

    you have had a massive day, so happy you have a friend to go to.

    You know I Think your awesome .

    when do you see gp or psych whoever is in control of your meds?

    I am also glad that bf is talking, just make sure he isn't talking you down ie MH when he needs to address himself first to fix things/you.

    me,I'm ok

    The serious Dory😘

  28. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    17 September 2017 in reply to Guest_128

    I rarely sit still. The weather was not conducive to staying home as well. Too much sun to waste!!

    prob go back in couple weeks to see gp. I'm happier off the meds.

    He has admitted his things too. He has issues with motivation. My complete opposite.

    thank you I think you are awesome too. In the BB fishbowl of awesomeness!!!

    🙂

    1 person found this helpful
  29. Guest_3712
    Guest_3712 avatar
    2003 posts
    17 September 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    HEy Awesome one's,

    Is there room in that fishbowl for one more- not saying I'm in the same league as you guys but just like hanging out with awesome one's like you, especially when both of you don't realize how incredible you both are

    Stressless

  30. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    18 September 2017 in reply to Guest_3712

    Totally!!! Lol. The more the merrier so long as no carnivorous bigger fish....

    Im gonna whinge.... about female stuff. This cycle has been crippling hormonally and physically!!!

    Aaaand my left tonsil seems to think it needs in on the action too. SERIOUSLY NO TONSIL BAD TONSIL!!!! 😡😡😡

    Man thing picked me up from work yesterday and bought me chippies and a Coke. He's behaving ATM. Ultimatums like telling him to take some responsibility for himself must've helped.

    Coffee and brekky time now... GOOD MORNING ALL!!!!

    v.

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