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Forums / Long term support over the journey / I always do things ass about

Topic: I always do things ass about

  1. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    28 May 2018 in reply to quirkywords

    For the most part yes. But the abuser is alienating, poisoning kids and destroying relationships between the kids and other family members through wilful actions.

    I have busy stuff at work. My boss is putting things onto me that are a little above my head, however, I am up for the challenge. :D

    I am sleeping well for a change HAHHA.

    V.

    1 person found this helpful
  2. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    30 May 2018 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Want to share a story about ghosting... or vanishing... I will keep it short.

    Early January 2016 I met and fell in love with someone who I thought was it. He said likewise. Built me up so high. Our relationship lasted 2 months or there abouts. He kept standing me up and breaking plans etc.

    February 15th was our valentines night as he had flown home from an unexpected FIFO trip.

    He gets a phone call while at my house and had to take off FAST as his niece and nephew were in a serious car accident and he rushed to the hospital to rally with family.

    From then on, he pretty much stopped talking to me, and also told me his ex wife took off to another state taking their son. He also has that going on. Lawyers etc etc. Chaos. Visits to that state. All that jazz.

    NOT TRUE! I have since found out the truth. I was the other woman. His partner HAD A BABY on Feb 15th and that's where he rushed off to. I was cut off, as obviously I had served my purpose. That relationship since ended as well and he has a new partner, and her child - looks like him too.

    I believe everything he told me was a lie. They are out there willing to lie, cheat and mislead.

    I was an unbelievable mess for 6 months after that wondering what the heck had happened. Eventually I found out. And I hope I never see his lying ugly ass again.

    V.

  3. quirkywords
    Community Champion
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    quirkywords avatar
    12428 posts
    31 May 2018 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Velvetfaerie,

    Your story was sad but only too familiar. Why do people lie and hurt others. Both men and women do this

    and do not seem to worry one iota about who they hurt and how many lies they tell.

    There is even a sitcom called Bliss about a man who has two families in two different towns who have no idea about each other. I have not watched it but seen the promos for it.

    I have no idea why anyone would make a show about that.

    I knew a woman who told a sweet male friend of mine that her husband was horrible to her, and that she was frightened of her husband. She told so many lies to my friend and he would not see what everyone else saw until she conned him out of loads of money and broke his heart.

    It was so sad.

    Quirky

  4. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    1 June 2018 in reply to quirkywords

    Some people are just nasty. I could never play games like that. It is not fair.

    Ah its friday. This is a good thing.

    V.

  5. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    4 June 2018 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Kids are intense. How can anyone be a parent? HAHA.

    Seems I have made a new friend - approx 4ft ft tall and 10 years old.

    URGH.

    1 person found this helpful
  6. quirkywords
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    quirkywords avatar
    12428 posts
    5 June 2018 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Velvet,

    10 year olds rock. They are fun and serious are not as cheeky as teens . The love learning new things and they still think adults know something!!

    Quirky

  7. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    5 June 2018 in reply to quirkywords

    She is a nice kid. There is a bit of cheek in there but it is in good humour.... for now.

    Was thinking of borrowing a microscope from work to show her some cool stuff.

    V.

  8. CMF
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    CMF avatar
    8660 posts
    6 June 2018 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Great stuff V. New little buddy. The microscope ounds like a cool idea.

    Glad to hear it's going well.

    CMF x

  9. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    6 June 2018 in reply to CMF

    Some of things that kid has said has made me LAUGH.

    V.

    1 person found this helpful
  10. CMF
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    CMF avatar
    8660 posts
    4 November 2019 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hey V,

    How's things my friend?

    cmf x

  11. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    4 November 2019 in reply to CMF

    Oh busy as usual. Tired. Lots going on and they’re good.

    Life is progressing pretty well... and it’s scary!

    1 person found this helpful
  12. CMF
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    CMF avatar
    8660 posts
    5 November 2019 in reply to velvetfaerie
    Still with the man? Last we spoke you met the kids and were getting along pretty well.
  13. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    5 November 2019 in reply to CMF

    Still with man. Divorce final.

    Settlement sorted.

    met only the youngest kid - who’s cool. The other one has been poisoned and his eldest son who rocked up out of the blue (different mum), also has been poisoned... the ex has been manipulating the kids to suit her agenda. I believe the youngest will also turn.

    The ex also decided to move man things older estranged son into her home for more gang ups on Man thing. She is a very toxic game playing person.

    I gave the boy the benefit of the doubt until unsolicited abusive messaged were left by him on mans phone.

    Ex has got the house and is getting it mortgages to her and her only. Love to know how she will manage that. New 30 year mortgage on about 400k and she is alone with two dependants. Probably why she moved the boy in - board and money!!

    Man thing and I can move forward now. He’s free of her and the house and that’s what he wanted. He signs the mortgage release and settlement paperwork this week. Aim is to live together from March.

    we have our moments - but I’m sure I’ve entered peri menopause and I’m taking herbal things to help. And so far so good. Should help my moods.

    we have been through so much in the last 3.25 years and we still together. He took a punt on me so it’s time I do the same and commit to living together.

     

     

    V.

     

    1 person found this helpful
  14. CMF
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    CMF avatar
    8660 posts
    6 November 2019 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Wow, alot has happened and all good. The ex will never change, hopefully he will move on and go away.

    So big move for you next year, that's exciting and something to look forward to.

    cmf x

  15. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3712 posts
    6 November 2019 in reply to CMF

    Yes. And man thing has been standing up to her and her interfering mother. It has been beautiful to watch.

    1 person found this helpful

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