Hi HamSolo01 (and you too Jay),
How are you doing today? Are the positive feelings from yesterday still going strong? I like the recent posts from both of you.
Jay is right your Mum makes a lot of sense. Smart woman. I'm not sure why I didn't pick up on that you lived at home ... I'm sorry.
Leaving home is an important step of being an adult. Part of accepting you are free to feel how you want to and are truly independent and have the right to do what you want and to learn who you are for yourself.
My sister told me once it is really difficult to feel comfortable putting yourself out there in a relationship if it's under the eyes of your family.
And then there is the part about judgement. As a woman... meeting a man who lives at home is a concern. When I met my husband he had moved back home while he sorted out buying a home of his own. Once this was explained to me I understood but my initial response when he said he lived at home was to back off.
Maybe it's just me but I would find that more of a concern than lack of sexual experience. You are 23 so it's not a big deal but that said I think your Mum is right. You need to be independent. Learn to have to cope with life on your own. It sounds harsh but living on your own and paying your own bills and making your own way in the world is a vital step because it is hard work. But it also teaches you that you're a lot stronger than you thought you were.
The biggest thing I learnt when I left the ex, finished uni and moved out by myself is that I am not my parents. I am not my partner. I have likes and dislikes and strengths and weaknesses and choices and responses that are all mine and noone elses.
It was scary but liberating to realise I am an unique human being and that I can make my own decisions just for me. I think this will be a really good thing for you too.
What do you think about this? I don't even think overseas is necessary just renting your own place is a massive achievement and shows you respect yourself as an adult independent of your parents. Paying your own bills and budgeting is a good feeling too.