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Forums / Long term support over the journey / In so much pain because of mood swings (Schizoaffective).

Topic: In so much pain because of mood swings (Schizoaffective).

  1. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    21 December 2018 in reply to monkey_magic

    Hello Monkey and thanks for thinking of me. I hope I didn't worry you too much. I'm doing a okay. Been away healing. As you already read on your thread I'm currently on Xmas leave then it's back to the psych ward.

    I can't wait until I'm home for good.

    This latest stint back in hospital is because I flipped out and rang my partner crying telling him I'm going to do myself in. Well he dropped everything at work and came home. Don't know why I wanted to do myself in but the urge was fierce. Look I better not be at home I said to him. Best I go back the MHU . So I self admitted but that soon changed when they seen the extent of my unwellness. They took away my freedom. They took me off my medication and introduced new ones. They made me sign my life away. That was ridiculous - asking me for my signature before starting me on a new medication. Heck what do I know. I'm mentally ill.

    This new drug they had me on was hardcore. I got sick from it. My heart. At one stage I asked doc if I'm going to die from it. They pulled me off it really swiftly and o boy I was a mess. I couldn't talk properly and I was drooling from excessive salivation. Had the shakes really badly too but they were more worried about my heart and certain numbers being too high.

    1 person found this helpful
  2. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    21 December 2018 in reply to Simona

    The latest: they finally found an antipsychotic which in the grand scheme of things is like a wholesome glass of milk. I didn't have to sign my life away. I tolerate it well and so far no side effects. This is given as a depot once a month in the arm.

    1 person found this helpful
  3. monkey_magic
    Valued Contributor
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    monkey_magic avatar
    3934 posts
    21 December 2018 in reply to Simona

    Geez they have put you through the ringer. How scary. I myself find it hard to trust them and their drugs.

    I tried doing myself in which is why I am here- still colouring in lol.

    It makes me so proud and happy to know u had the strength to overcome your anorexia that is massive so a huge congrats 4 that.

    U r also being proactive in your recovery so another great achievement.

    Welcome back chicka ;-)

    1 person found this helpful
  4. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    22 December 2018 in reply to monkey_magic

    Thank you Monkey : ) Yeah I'm actually healthy as my blood tests show.

    In hospital I have asked to please don't let me see my current weight. So the nurses help and I avert my gaze to the wall - anywhere but the scale.

  5. Wilma1
    Wilma1 avatar
    1630 posts
    22 December 2018 in reply to Simona
    Hi Simona, good to see you making progress after such a hard time. Hospital isn't easy. I've been in and out a few times over the past few months. I hope the new medication works for you, it's really hard finding the right one. I hope your Christmas goes as well as can be expected. Thinking of you. 💗💕
  6. monkey_magic
    Valued Contributor
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    monkey_magic avatar
    3934 posts
    22 December 2018 in reply to Simona

    Anywhere but the scales lol. I felt the same as I'm gaining weight in here. Hey, there's a downstairs cafe and I had a dirty chai. I've never tried it before but rem u talking about it so I gave it a try. Still prefer my Gloria Jeans though.

    Hi Wilma. Hope ur OK after all those hospital stays. It ain't a walk in the park....I'm currently in one, almost 2 mnths- let me out already. Night ladies,

    MMx

    1 person found this helpful
  7. Wilma1
    Wilma1 avatar
    1630 posts
    22 December 2018 in reply to monkey_magic
    Monkey-Magic, sorry to hear you are currently in hospital. The dirty chai sounds good. I tried one also, back to cappuccinos though. Take care of yourself. 💜💕💜💕💗💗
    1 person found this helpful
  8. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    23 December 2018 in reply to Wilma1

    Hello Wilma : wow I haven't seen you in ages! Now I'm thinking of your little dog on your lap : ) Sorry to hear you too have been in and out of hospital. I call it the revolving door. I hope you're feeling somewhat settled now and I wish you a peaceful Merry Xmas. I'm not doing much. On Monday I have to go and get my depot. Then I go back to hospital on Boxing Day.

    2 people found this helpful
  9. Wilma1
    Wilma1 avatar
    1630 posts
    23 December 2018 in reply to Simona

    Yes Simona, a revolving door is such a good discription of our hospital stays.

    My little dog is as faithful as ever, and on my knee. Lol. How are your furry family and the kids???

    I hope your Christmas goes as good as it can. Sorry you have to go back to hospital, but sometimes, it's the only way to stay alive. Lots of these for you. 💛💕💜💗💕💛🐾🐾🐾

    1 person found this helpful
  10. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    23 December 2018 in reply to Wilma1

    Speedy and Cupcake are no longer kittens. Speedy loves sitting on partner's lap because he adores the pats but he doesn't do that with me. Cupcake isn't fond of pats or scratches. She sits outside my daughter's bedroom door and she will sing and sing until she's let in. Then she will jump on the bed and make a nest of sorts.

    Our little dog is well and happy. She's the centre of attention again now that the in-laws are home again.

    The children are well. Miss 11 and Master 13 just want money for Xmas. Master 19 is travelling up from the city because he's spending a few days with his dad (my ex husband). I hope to catch up with him because I have only seen him once this year. He just doesn't visit so his bedroom has now become a storage room. Boxes of toys the children no longer want etc. We should have a garage sale though I'm just not good with meeting/greeting new people. I get paranoid .

    Love the hearts and the paws - thank-you : )

    1 person found this helpful
  11. Wilma1
    Wilma1 avatar
    1630 posts
    23 December 2018 in reply to Simona

    I thought your family, fur ones and children, would be growing fast Simona. Time in some ways can go fast, yet in other ways, goes slow.

    I had a garage sale when I moved 3 mths ago. It was very difficult, but rewarding money wise. Not something I want to do again though.

    My fur baby is always on my knee, lol, we are attached at the hip I think. Lol.

    You sound like you have a supportive partner, something worth hanging on to.

    do you do any photography these days ?? I have been painting stones lately. Sounds strange, I know, but there are some lovely things done on stones. Good for pressies.

    Enjoy your time out of hospital, and take care of yourself. Lots of these again.💜💕💜💕🐾🐾🐾💜💕🐾🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶

    2 people found this helpful
  12. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    24 December 2018 in reply to Wilma1

    I have not been into photography for quite some time now. Painting stones sounds interesting. My daughter came home with 3 painted stones this year. She just found them. There are different patterns/colours. One of them has a snail painted on it. The idea being you find the stones then you take a photo and post it to a Facebook page ; Vic Rocks saying where you found them.

    I'm trying to enjoy my time but truth is I have a very sore lower back so I feel hunched over and very stiff like any minute something will go pop and I will be crawling on the floor.

    All the Christmas stuff is done. We are having lunch with partner's parents tomorrow.

    You take care of yourself too : )

    1 person found this helpful
  13. Wilma1
    Wilma1 avatar
    1630 posts
    25 December 2018 in reply to Simona

    Simona, sorry you are having lower back problems. Lunch with your partners parents sounds good. I hope you find a comfortable position and enjoy as much as you can.

    I have been for a walk with Furbaby and heading over for a bbq soon. Hope you have some nice pressies, you, the children and partner. Lots of these for you.💛💛💛😍😍

    Monkey- Magic, I hope you are having an enjoyable Christmas. I'm not sure if you are in hospital atm, if you are, I hope the day is as good as it can be if not, I hope you have some good company to share some of the day with. 🌷🌷🌷💕💕

    1 person found this helpful
  14. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    18 November 2019 in reply to Wilma1

    I have remained stable. Depot injection every month plus antipsychotic medication. I recently just stopped one of them. It was making me put on the weight and now I have 8 kilos to lose. Abit of insomnia but doing ok.

    I struggle with accepting my diagnosis and I miss my 'friends' and the delusions

    2 people found this helpful
  15. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    18 November 2019 in reply to Simona
    And though I'm no longer anorexic I still have the mentality. I prefer myself to be very thin like a size 10. Will try not to get too carried away with losing weight this time.
    3 people found this helpful
  16. quirkywords
    Community Champion
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    quirkywords avatar
    12345 posts
    18 November 2019 in reply to Simona

    Simona,

    thanks for keeping touch and updating us on how you are going.

    Accepting a diagnosis can be difficult . I missed my highs not the chaotic ones but the ones when I felt strong and confident.

    The good thing is you are stable.

    You have an awareness about your weight and that will help you . Is your lower back better now?

    Quirky

    1 person found this helpful
  17. Wilma1
    Wilma1 avatar
    1630 posts
    19 November 2019 in reply to Simona

    Hi Simona, good to hear from you. It sounds like things are going ok ish for you at present. So good to hear that, you have been through some very tough times indeed.

    You will be moving into the heat, if not there already. We had more snow on the mountains just over a week ago, but things are warming up now.

    I moved into a new flat yesterday, so unpacking. All good there.

    Take care of yourself. You are doing great. 💜💜💜💜

  18. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    19 November 2019 in reply to quirkywords
    Hello Quirky : ) yes my back is better thank you. I used to have the very happy highs and the painful lows. I have only been prescribed a mood stabilizer once and I reacted badly to it so they stopped it immediately. That was when i was hospitalized last year. I do appreciate being stable and enjoying my family. They mean the world to me.
    1 person found this helpful
  19. Simona
    Simona avatar
    1043 posts
    19 November 2019 in reply to Wilma1

    Hello Wilma : ) yeah we are already having some hot days so I need to have the air con in the car regassed because driving with the windows down lets in the flies and messes up my hair. My hair is almost shoulder length now and I like to look well groomed. Not sure if you read it in Monkey Magic's thread but my little dog has gone to God. A big brown snake got her about 9 months ago. Miss my little girl very much. She used to pull her bottom in and run around in these crazy tight circles. We have a pup now about 7 months old - Staffy X. His name is Sam. Very muscley built and goes like a rocket. So you have a new home : ) Hows the plants from your last place? did you bring any to your new flat? We have a Chinese Star Jasmine climbing like crazy over our cats outdoor enclosure. I had that plant from when I was living in a flat with a little balcony. Very resilient plant and smells so pretty.

    1 person found this helpful
  20. Wilma1
    Wilma1 avatar
    1630 posts
    19 November 2019 in reply to Simona

    Simona, sorry you lost your baby to a brown snake. Really hard. I can imagine how much you miss her. So good you have a pup now. That will keep you busy.

    Shoulder length hair, well done you. I’m still with a crew cut. 🙃🙃🙃

    You certainly are sounding much better. So good when you find the right meds.

    Yes, just a few pansies from my last place. I think this is another move after the move, since I last wrote to you. It’s my forth in three years. I’m over it, but this is my forever home I hope.

    I still have my baby with me. She’s beautiful.

    Off to unpack some more. Hope car air con is fixed soon, it’s hot up your way. Take care.

    1 person found this helpful

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