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Topic: Sad musings

  1. Peppermintbach
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    9 June 2019

    Hi wonderful DB (and a wave to all),

    Thank you for giving me a chuckle with your post. So heart warming & caring. Thank you so very much...

    I agree that crying is a good release. Flushing out some emotions was needed. Of course we are still friends...nothing “warped” or “uncaring” about what you said at all. Don’t even worry about it ;)

    I know you, & many other lovelies, benefit greatly from positive thinking. I think that’s fantastic, & I’m so happy that it helps a lot of people.

    I like Peppily. You’re the best at coming up with nicknames for people. I know you’ve gifted birdy with Tweets/Tweety & Grandy also has a few... You show your affection & sense of fun this way....I love it

    346 bars for a VIP class...that I didn’t sign up for? Lol. Come on, can’t you give a friend a freebie! Yes, I drive a hard bargain...

    Your well wishes & love are felt & cherished by me. Supersoul hugs & much love xoxo

    Dear friend/beautiful birdy: I feel sad for mrs b & her mum. That must be hard on her (& you too). It’s very scary & overwhelming that her mum’s final days are near. Also, because of problematic relationships, that’s an extra layer of emotions...

    I’m glad she at least has your beautiful love to to lean into. Let us know how today goes but only if you feel like talking about it...I understand you may or may not wish to discuss it. But just know if you want to chat (or need a distraction), we are here, my friend.

    team tweets makes a great gardening duo! Complementary. Instant gratification versus delayed results. It must be very satisfying to see the results...

    I agree that dance is special. Have you ever felt pure elation when watching a live performance/on a screen that just takes your breath away or alternatively, been moved to tears by a sad dance? Stories via movement.

    I smiled about how you both love to dance. I looked up Ceroc, & apparently it’s a mix of swing, ballroom and jive? That sounds epic!

    I want to start looking into dance studios that teach salsa. By nature, I’m passionate/ intense but exercise self restraint because it’s not a very welcome quality. Dance, art, etc helps me to process my emotions, & tell a story that would otherwise be untold.

    Thank you, as always, for your gorgeous love & support. For never making me feel like I need to change the core parts of myself. For your friendship. Thanks for being the beautiful soul you are.

    Love you too & sending my love to mrs b as well. Thinking of both of you today xoxox

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  2. demonblaster
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    9 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Our gentle lovely Peppstar Tweety and readers hiyaz ☺

    😆 loven the VIP status my love thing is sweety in this world the only way to reach the top is to challenge yourself 😄 hence because you're such a good friend how bout I knock one 🍫 more off yes you do drive a hard bargain but must say an admirable quality in that you won't be pushed around.

    I may not have used an emoji. The still friends are we very 😜 all the same great hearing we are 🤗

    Forgot to reply darl yes agratitudes daily are fabulous and I'd think they're a form of positives too. Maybe along the lines of grounding ourselves.

    By all means Peppily 👍let me know if I'm on the wrong track. I know how deeply and compassionate you are towards the cruelties and abhorrent treatment of people and animals in our world. I wonder if that is the or a reason you find positives difficult. Trust me darlin I really am not trying to nag or lecture promise just would love maybe something could help. I understand how you feel about the above it breaks my heart too, both (no not two hearts 😆) It's taking me a long time to not let this affect me which it does. I avoid news for the most and you hear about things, not at all saying others should its just what I do and my belief that 75% of people are inherently good of course with faults. I try to remember the goods in the world which can be very hard when so many people needlessly suffer.

    Enjoying you and Tweets convo 9n dancing it's certainly a great release and must be a buzz doing that type. Think my friend does Salsa and others. Was interesting hearing about a different to me interest. She's in NZ we social media at times. Cemented friendship for many yrs. Shes the one that hopes to come over next yr.

    I care and love you Peps very much. Please forgive me and do say if I'm being too pushy not intentionally.

    Often think about you darlz. Thank you too for chuckles it breaks it up doesnt it.

    Look after yourself dear friend ☘🌿🤗☺

    Tweety love how very sad and such mixed emotions. This is such a very hard time to go through. I have comfort in knowing the strong bond and love you have for Mrs Birdy and back which will make this rocky road a little smoother.

    I hope you're travelling at least a little easier beautiful tweets.

    Big love and care to you as well sweet. Please give Mrs Tweety a big comforting hug.

    Good days lovely ones 🤗☺

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  3. Peppermintbach
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    14 June 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi wonderful DB (and a wave to all),

    Thank you so very much for your very insightful and caring suggestions. I love having you here. Thankfully, I can say that world horrors have very little do with how I’m not really into positive thinking. But I can definitely see why you suggested that :)

    It’s just that if I’m struggling, I find trying to generate positive thoughts creates a lot of inner turmoil/conflict. It makes me feel torn between how I truly feel and how I’m trying to make myself feel. The end result is I just feel even more exhausted, sadder and drained than before. For that reason, I don’t tend to engage in that line of thinking...

    That being said, I completely understand positive thinking helps a lot of people (including you), which I think is fantastic. I’m glad it helps so many people :)

    Thanks again for sharing your generous compassion, deep well of caring and clever insights. I’m always happy and honoured for you to share your theories, opinions and personal experiences with us here. They are important and valid. Very grateful for your loving heart and wonderful mind...

    I think it’s great that your friend has been learning the salsa. I would like to do that too. It‘s such a high energy dance with attitude, which I love about it! Hopefully she’ll visit next year. Wouldn’t that be lovely? You would have so much to catch up on...

    This is unrelated and I can’t remember who said it here. But recently someone on the forums here mentioned that one of his/her life purposes is the pursuit of knowledge. That’s a good one. It made me smile and I wanted to share it with you :)

    Supersoul hugs, free choccy bars as I’m feeling generous (better grab them before I change my mind) and much love xoxo


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  4. demonblaster
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    14 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Peppystar 🤗 hi everyone 👋

    One of the many things I appreciate and love about you is your excellent communication skills, not only how you express yourself so beautifully and clearly, the fact you talk things out.

    Thanks explaining why it doesn't help you. That's a shame. I'm a believer in if we can't do it one way to look for other options. Not hassling hun I realky do believe there's ways for a good proportion of us to gain inner peace and you without a doubt have high intelligence and ability to learn how I think that we all have intelligence and thats our power.

    I feel sorry knowing you have such deep pain. I wish I could do something to help.

    Something that's taken pretty much a lifetime for me is and I heard you lovey that it's not what I thought it could be and thank you for being so graceful you really are a lovely person. So this could apply to anything and no idea if it'll help but I'll say it anyway cause someone reading could get something. It's actually a saying I think. There's a few things I have/do feel passionately about and you know me pretty well I get really stirred up about some things. If I absolutely don't have a hope of changing it and often I'll exhaust many possibilities. I've learnt to try not to let it eat at me because it eats away if not.

    I think I've seen Salsa on dancing comps, mil loves them and it does seem a very intense full throttle dance. Good hearing you have an interest in dancing. It'd keep people fit too and like many of the arts I'd imagine a great release letting go and letting rip.

    Ok my dear generous loving Peppy I'll just borrow Grandys 🚜 from her famous 💼 and be there before you can blink actually, would be devo if you changed your mind. Thankyee oh great Peppy choccy stasher always loved you 😆🤗☺

    Go easy darls 🕊🐧

    Hey Tweety how are you going lovey been thinking about you too.

    Love to you both and of course Grandy Floss 👩‍❤️‍👩 she does have a few names but I don't think anyone has as many as you Peps 😆

    👩‍❤️‍👩☘🐥💗💜💟👀🤝

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  5. Peppermintbach
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    16 June 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi wonderful DB (and a wave to all),

    Thank you so very much for the very encouraging and thoughtful reply. You responded to my comments so beautifully and graciously. That means a lot, lovely :)

    Sorry, is it okay if I please ask what do you mean by “inner peace”? If by inner peace, you mean calm and stable, I understand that that is a wonderful emotional state to be in/goal for many people. That’s great and completely understandable, and fantastic if it suits the person. However, that’s not necessarily the type of inner peace that I’m looking for personally...

    I think that I have mentioned before that I am ,by nature (my disposition), on the more volatile/intense/passionate end of the emotional spectrum. It’s a side of me, which is ironically also a core part of me, that is suppressed most of the time.

    I dial it down several notches most of the time, for the sake of most people...I don’t believe that this intensity (or call it what you like) is a very welcome trait of mine...if given free reign, I would emotionally and intellectually drain most people around me. An ex used to complain that I was “on” all the time...apparently I did his head in...

    But the thing is I feel most “at peace” when that intensity has freedom of expression. It may not be “peace” as most know it, but it’s my own version of it. A more electric experience...

    When I try a calmer version of peace, I feel as though I’m fighting myself because I’m fighting my nature/disposition. So I’m fighting me...

    I’m fortunate and blessed to have wonderful friends like you who want the best for me. People like you who care and offer me love and ideas. Again, thank you...

    I love how you’re sharing quotes and inspiration with me. That’s very special :) Sorry, I’m not sure which part of that 4th paragraph was the quote.

    So can I ask a big favour for you to please help me out and clarify which part was the quote? I suspect it’s the last 2-4 sentences of that paragraph but I’m not sure if I’ve misunderstood/misinterpreted...

    You made me smile with how you’re collecting the free choccies with Grandy’s truck. Lol. You’re in luck, I haven’t changed my mind about the freebies so you were smart to act quickly ;)

    Super soul hugs and much love xoxo

    P.S. beautiful birdy/dear friend...sending you and your equally beautiful mrs b my love and some warm hugs. If you see rain and/or a thunderstorm, think of it as me saying hello and sending my blessings (to both of you) in my messy, warped way xoxox


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  6. Birdy77
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    16 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Hello Friend ❤

    It is really, really raining!! - thank you for your cosy company 😊.

    Thank you so much for your loving thoughts, you too Aunty Deebsta. I've passed on both of your care and love to mrs b /mrs t ❤.

    Things are very challenging at the moment, and no doubt will become more so over the next weeks.

    We are in separate locations, I'm at home and she is staying at her family home. So many ugly things happening with golden boy etc, and hard when we're apart, but it's all part of the difficulties of life. The inevitable end is still to come.

    I was reading some stuff on a website recently called eggshelltherapy.com I thought of you at the time, and now here you are chatting with Deebs about emotional intensity - you might find it interesting to have a look at if you haven't already come across it. I think you'll like it.

    Oh ceroc is the absolute bomb my friend! If you ever see classes advertised, I would highly recommend it. Once you step on to the floor, you absolutely cannot stop smiling!! It is wonderful! I wish there was a class near me now I would 100% go.

    Oh Pepper, I totally know what you mean about being emotionally caught up in the dance you're watching! I was laughing and crying at the same time simply watching a flashmob the other day, and even watching some ceroc youtubes after I mentioned it last week. Tears and giggles all at once!! Dance really is a powerful expression of emotion.

    I truly love that you have your dance and other art forms to tell your "story that would otherwise go untold" (love the way you said that).

    Sorry I haven't addressed everything, I'll get back to you. Just felt like popping in and saying hi and love ❤

    🌻birdy xoxo
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  7. Peppermintbach
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    16 June 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Dear friend/beautiful birdy (and a wave to all),

    I’m happy to keep you company :) Funny how I mentioned rain and it was actually raining...things sound really, really tough, & as you said, the physical distance must be hard. I also think it’s painful to see loved ones hurting...

    Sigh, golden boy seems like he is at the centre of a lot of drama and issues...that must make things a thousand times worse than it needs to be. Things are rough enough as it is without the ugly things he is implicated with...

    It made me smile when you wrote about dance. I felt a lift in tone when you wrote about ceroc. I think it’s a shame that there aren’t any nearby classes. But perhaps you can still practice your moves at home and/or watch instructive videos to learn more :) Obviously dancing at home has an entirely different atmosphere, but it’s still beautiful in its own right...

    I agree that dance is a powerful expression of emotion. As you once wisely said, “if you can move, you can dance.” I’m going to be quoting you forever so thanks for that pearl ;)

    I looked up what you mentioned, and felt that it described me to a T. The intense emotions, sensory overload, quick thinking, restlessness, etc, etc. Then when life problems are added to an already volatile core, it’s a lot. I’m a lot. Thank you so very much for sharing that with me, my friend.

    I’m not sure what to do with myself, but it’s all a gradual unfolding...one day maybe I’ll find where I need to be, who I need to be around and what I want to be doing...one day...

    Thank you so much for thinking of me & making time for me. I’m truly blessed. You can write here any time...about anything. Ceroc, mrs b, mrs t, golden boy, your animal friends, your garden, your troubles, your joy, your fears, your hopes, be silly, be serious...free reign, my friend.

    That is my gift to you ;) No obligation or pressure but that gift is always there...

    I know that I say this a lot, but I truly think you are a very special person, and anyone who’s lucky to cross paths with you is incredibly blessed. I am a lot of work (a lot!), yet you so patiently & lovingly stay as a friend means more than I can ever convey.

    I feel there’s no need to apologise to me about not “addressing anything”...just when & if you feel up to it. You have a lot going on as it is...you’re beautiful and sensitive to apologise but there’s really no need...

    My love to you, mrs b and mrs t. Any time you see rain or a storm, think of it as me sending my love xoxox

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  8. Birdy77
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    26 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Hello darling friend ❤

    What a beautiful message you wrote me. I've read it multiple times since you wrote it - I feel comforted and uplifted and I thank you from the bottom of my heart xoxo

    You are such a special gem, inviting me to use your space here to talk about whatevs. I feel like you are a true friend in my heart, and I'm so happy that we've connected through this space. It's weird, and it's very nice ❤

    You will definitely find your direction ... I think sometimes when we feel most directionless is when we are suddenly set on the right path somehow. The universe steps in. We just have to put the question out there. It's happened to me in the past, and I'm putting my trust in the universe that it will happen again. Directionless is a hard place to be (hi Aunty Deebs, Aunty (?😁) Grandy).

    I loved your suggestion of practicing some ceroc moves and watching vids ... I just might do that in my kitchen any day now. I had a little dance off with one of the fur boys today, and then the other one came in and it was rumble time 🙄


    How are things in your world lovely friend?

    I am a bit lonesome.

    Love ya xoxoxo

    🌻birdy xo
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  9. Peppermintbach
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    26 June 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Our darling friend birdy (& a wave to all),

    Isn’t that what true friendship about? Giving people the freedom and space to be who and what they need to be ;)

    To self express as they want/need and to feel what they want to feel. Genuine acceptance and freedom. That’s a key part of friendship (or any type of meaningful relationship/dynamic in general) or at least in my opinion :)

    My dear friend, I am gently holding out my hand to you to offer comfort, love and reassurance. I feel sad for your loneliness. I wonder what it stems from...

    I can speculate why but maybe it’s better if I just hold that space for you to feel whatever it is you need or want to feel. If you want to talk about it (or about anything else), you know that you have a friend in me....

    I too am immensely grateful for our friendship/connection here. I say this often but you are a truly special soul. You’re a rare person who gives me space to be me; someone who doesn’t seem to be bothered or intimidated by my edges. In fact, if anything else, you actively encourage me to let the edges show through...

    The dance off with one of your boys sounds absolutely magical. I feel dance can be healing as can friendship with non-human animals :) Feel free to let me know how ceroc goes. I would love to hear about your home dance comps!

    I have been teary. Emotional. Angry. Frustrated. Irritated. Tired. Weary. Hurt. Sad.( Feel)misunderstood. I’m still trying to find my place and my people, but I typically end up with both hands empty...

    Wanting to be understood but feel that is very, very hard to come by. Sigh, I think most people can only meet you where they themselves are at...and unfortunately my needs are vast. Maybe it’s not that my needs are vast, perhaps I’m just seeking out the wrong type of people...people can’t give what they don’t have...

    I did find a dance studio that is offering heavily discounted introductory salsa dance classes for a term. The drawback is it’s a little out of my way, so I’m deciding whether to enrol there or to find another studio (I would have to pay more).

    How have you been?

    Thank you as always for your beautiful presence, my more than enough friend. We love you just as you are. But if you ever want to change (because your own heart/mind desires it), we will support that too. Whatever you need.

    As I said, I believe that true friendship is about creating space for our friends to be whoever they need/want to be.

    Love you too, my friend and my love to mrs b too xoxox

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  10. Birdy77
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    26 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    My Friend,

    You are absolutely right, that is what true friendship is about, allowing each to be exactly who they are, and holding the space for them to do just that. Thank you ❤

    I feel really sad to know how you've been feeling. I long for the day when you feel understood and embraced for who you are in all your awesome complexity.

    I think much of your angst is maybe because you haven't quite found your people and your tribe. Those who will celebrate and cheer all your edges and angles alongside your gentle soft spots and all the other pieces in between.

    In some of the articles on the eggshell site I mentioned, I liked the way she mentioned that being asked to conform, or reduce yourself down to fit in with other's ideas is the exact way to make freakin supernova feel misunderstood and out of whack.

    That inner-peace that Aunty Deebs mentioned I think doesn't need to be always described like a calm, blissed out, glassy quietude - maybe it can be achieved by being truly accepted and understood and embraced, in all your crazy, kookoo, electric awesomeness. And to accept yourself as well. That sounds like inner peace to me.

    I reckon it might be fun to change it up a bit and go out of your way to try the intro salsa ... our of your usual area, might meet some different people ... ??

    I will let you know how I go with the home ceroc comps , sometimes with two boys in the mix it can turn to mayhem! I might have to lock them on the deck while I have a YouTube session in the kitchen!

    I just feel a bit lonesome with mrs b away I guess ... I think that's it. Lots of crap going down with golden boy et al ... (true headache material).

    ❤❤❤❤

    xoxo

    🌻birdy xo
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  11. Peppermintbach
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    27 June 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Dear friend/beautiful birdy (and a wave to all),

    Gentle hugs from me, my friend...I had thought that maybe your lonesome feelings had something to do with missing mrs b. I just didn’t want to push/pry, so left you with the decision to mention her absence or not...

    I think it will be very special when you reunite, but for now, I understand the physical distance must be hard. You’re so used to her loving presence and company each night...

    Sigh, of course golden boy plays a starring role in every family drama :/ I can’t say I’m surprised based on what I’ve heard. Considering the circumstances, you would think he would act differently but clearly not...he must add needless frustration and difficulties (and things are rough enough as it is too).

    To be understood and accepted would be lovely :) A place where my too muchness won’t be too much...if only, right?

    A sincere and heartfelt thank you for your genuine acceptance of me. It means more than you know, dear friend...thank you so much for being someone who has never made me feel as though I’m too much.

    I have been reading eggshell snippets here and there and it has helped me feel less alone...I have been wondering if there was a particular reason you were reading about emotional intensity (or call it what you like). I have been wondering do you identify with some of the associated traits? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to of course. I’m just thinking out loud...

    I agree that inner peace doesn’t necessarily have to be the more traditional interpretation of a calm and quiet life. I think it can mean different things to different people :)

    Time-out might be best for your boys if you want to make progress with your ceroc ;) I look forward to hearing all about your wonderful new dance moves. Feel free to chat any time. As I said, free rein, my friend...talk about whatever you like...

    Keep being the beautiful person you are...keep shining :)

    With my love to you, your beautiful mrs b and your gorgeous boys xoxox

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  12. quirkywords
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    28 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Pepper,

    I am popping in to say hello and reading some of the posts. You have a real talent with writing and in creating a mood by your use of words. Also you are always compassionate wen responding to other posters and even if I didn't see your name, you have a distinctive style I would always recognise.

    How are you?

    Quirky

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  13. Birdy77
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    28 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Hello my friend ❤

    To find that space with others where your too-muchness is just right - it is out there, and you will find it. In the meantime, I'm so happy to think that at least you accept your own awesomeness and at the very least, my precious friend: you have here. You will never be too much - you are just right as you are ❤

    I can't remember how I came across the eggshell site, I'm always finding stuff here and there and usually have about 37 tabs open at once. Sometimes if mrs b goes to use my phone for something, she says are you sure you need all these pages open? And I'm like yes! I'm using all of those, I need every one of them open!

    Yes I do relate to some of the attributes she writes about. The high sensitivity/misfit traits for sure, and some others. When I was reading a lot of the stuff about emotional intensity and some other bits under misfitism I thought of you and wondered if it might speak to your experiences and feelings somewhat. I'm glad you're exploring her writings here and there and that it might be helping you even just to feel a little bit less alone.

    Oh I wanted to say that when I read your thoughts about feeling misunderstood and coming away from people "with both hands empty", I imagined those heartfelt words and that searching, searching feeling as a dance. It would make a powerful piece.

    mrs b and i were planning to go to a music event tomorrow night at a favourite little venue of ours ... I am wondering whether I should go on my own or just leave it. We did invite our neighbour a while ago to come with is if she wanted to, but we hadn't organised it yet so I could ask her if she wanted to come with me. I will probably end up putting on pyjarmies at 6pm and snuggling in front of a movie with the boys. Do you have any plans?


    ❤❤❤❤❤

    🌻birdy xoxoxo
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  14. Peppermintbach
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    29 June 2019

    Hi lovely Quirky (and a wave to all),

    Thanks so much for your words of encouragement and support :) What a special & unexpected treat.

    I think we all have our own voice in writing, including you. I feel you have your own style, direct & marked by a crisp cadence. It’s your signature :)

    I recall reading somewhere that you want to enrol in a writing course. I hope you don’t mind me asking here how is that going?

    I’m currently a little hungover & waging the usual war with myself, because I’m never at peace with myself. I saw my psych this week who wants to address certain issues. I do not.

    Thanks again for being the wonderfully caring person you are. Quirky and interesting (& interested in others), just as your name suggests :) xoxo

    dear friend/beautiful birdy: You’re lovely, kind, supportive & reassuring. I’m truly grateful. Anyone who gets to call you Friend is very lucky.

    I know that I repeat this, but I feel it’s important to tell friends how much we appreciate them. Also, it reminds me not to take anyone for granted.

    When I read the eggshell points, I felt as though I was ticking off all the key points (& most of the sub-points too). This attribute (check). That attribute (check). Check, check, check. Thanks so much for thinking of me when you were reading :)

    I think it’s great that you’re interested in a diverse range of topics. Your sensitivity is beautiful by the way. It’s such a gorgeous quality of yours & I‘m thankful that we get to see some of that here...as for the misfit traits, I’m not sure which specific ones you mean, but I think you’re great.

    In so many ways, I truly believe you are what this world needs. We need more birdies in this world :)

    Both hands empty is a common theme in my life. I think of it as a piercing scream. In dance form? Many, many interpretations. Sometimes showing is an alternative to telling ;)

    That music event sounds lovely. It’s a shame that mrs b can’t go. While I understand home might be tempting, maybe it might be nice to get out of the house tonight & let loose for a bit?

    That being said, of course it’s your decision, & as your friend, I’ll support you either way. So either a doona & movie night with your boys or live music with your neighbour is good. Whatever you prefer.

    I’d love to hear how tonight night goes, whatever you end up doing, if you’re happy to share :)

    I went out last night with friends & had too many cocktails so will be taking it easy tonight. Feeling dehydrated now. Love you xoxox

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  15. Ggrand
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    29 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hello Gentle Peppy🍀, Sweet Birdy🌻 and all.

    I have been listening along to your conversation and find it so beautiful watching your lovely friendship bloom...It really is heart warming...

    Peppy, I’m pleased you enjoyed yourself last night with your friends....Hearing you been dehydrated is not really good and is a good recipe for a headache 🤕...Please sip on water throughout today and night...I have a hamper here for you I made up especially to rehydrate you....Theirs some electrolyte drink..some pure sparkling spring water..some strawberries and of course the chocolate dipping sauce...umm they are your chocolates my choccy magnet found in your pocket..it’s okay though because I made it into a choccy sauce and I’m giving them back to you😁...

    Hello Birdy...I hope what ever you choose to do tonight is enjoyable...I’m sorry sweety your missing Mrs B...I’m certain that she is also missing you so much as well....won’t be long and she will be back home...Then a lovely homecoming celebration will be on the cards for you both...I also made a hamper for you sweety Birdy..it has some strawberries with Peppy’s choccy...some warm pumpkin soup..(Deebi’s recipe)..with croutons, some spring water and some soy chips....

    I hope so much that you both are being kind to yourselves...and have some light in your days...I enjoy ear dropping on your conversation...if that’s okay...

    I wish I could help support you both, for some reason my mind gets all tangled up when I listen to you both..I’m not sure why because both of your posts are always so heart warming, caring and beautiful...like the both of you🤗💜..

    I hope regardless of what you do over the week end gives you some enjoyment and a break away from negativity...

    Sending you both warm caring hugs..my love and warm wishes...💜💜🤗🤗🍀🌻..

    Grandy...

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  16. Birdy77
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    30 June 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Hello my friend,

    Are you feeling better? I'm hoping you took Grandy's advice and kept sipping on water .... im6also hoping that you've stocked up on the good old berocca as well, it's so good for times like yesterday.

    It was so good to hear you had gone out with friends and let loose a bit. Cocktails are very easy to go overboard with, and I was reading (on one of my 37 open tabs) the other day that the sugar in them adds to the hangover effect, which is rather sneaky of it. Seeming all sweetness and light and coming up with a bit of nastiness afterwards.

    Did you go dancing?

    I had too much red wine last night, so I empathise completely 🙄

    My neighbour couldn't come with to the Thing last night, and it was cold and I just wasn't in the mood, so I stayed home and cooked a yummy dinner and rearranged the furniture, it looks so cosy ... I like doing it from time to time, changing things up. Tried having a dance off but it went to mayhem.

    Grandy, you're so lovely - you do support us!! Do not worry if you don't write often to me, I absolutely know you care - and I don't write often on yours or your BBC's either, but I hope you both know I care very much for you and send love. I always read both of your threads, and actually am going to pop over to yours in a mo to encourage you about something. (Ooooh, the mystery!!!).

    My brain's a bit mooshy tonight .... talk again soon my friend, love you.

    xoxo

    🌻birdy

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  17. Peppermintbach
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    1 July 2019

    Hi lovely Grandy (and a wave to all),

    Thank you for the very thoughtful & generous hamper. So many treats! The sourness of the strawberries complements the sweet chocolate perfectly. Okay, okay...seeing as you are giving me a hamper, I’ll let you off with the whole choccy magnet situation this time. Just don’t make a habit of it ;)

    Of course you’re most welcome here any time. Writing, reading along, etc; just whatever you feel most comfortable doing is great.

    Lovely one, I know you care very much. Your presence on these forums is support enough to me. Please don’t get upset or worry too much about posting. It’s okay. You most certainly do support me :)

    Thank you for the precious caring hugs and I’m offering some to you too xoxo

    Darling friend/beautiful birdy:

    Thank you so much for checking in. I’m feeling much better. Water definitely helped and I really appreciate the tip :)

    Perhaps it was for the best that your neighbour had something else on. It sounds like a night in was probably what you needed at the time.

    I know it can be particularly cosy on a cold night to be home. Your meal sounds delicious! I know you enjoy cooking and experimenting with different recipes. What did you end up making?

    I understand about the wine. I hope you’ve been extra gentle with your lovely self, dear friend. How are you feeling today & what are you up to?

    Thanks for sharing the info about cocktails. Your 37 tabs definitely comes in handy ;)

    I RSVP’d to an art thing this weekend. I’m excited but also slightly nervous as I won’t know anyone there. In the past, I’ve always known people or convinced friends or (now) exes to come.

    I did consider asking a friend, but I know that I would end up talking to them, & not really mingle with the unfamiliar faces. So I took a deep breath and selected “no” in the plus-1 option. Not knowing anyone there would force me to mingle.

    I know the reality is that the people currently in my offline world can’t meet my needs. It’s not their fault and it’s not mine either.

    People can’t give what they don’t have...

    But maybe if I start looking further afield, there’s a tiny chance that I might find the genuine understanding that I crave? Maybe?

    Thank you for being you. I’m truly grateful for your friendship and for you, as a person. I always look to you as an example of deep caring, understanding and compassion.

    As always, if you ever want to talk about anything any time: free rein ;) Good and bad, I’m here for you. Much love xoxox

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  18. Birdy77
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    1 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Dear precious friend 😊

    I am so happy to hear of your braveness: clicking the zero plus-one for this weekend's upcoming Thing!! That's awesome, and even if you don't end up chatting to anyone in particular, it's excellent that you've selected the courageous option outside the good old comfort zone. Proud of ya ❤

    The recurring theme of Both Hands Empty is a powerful one, and you listening to that theme and responding is warrior material. xo

    Speaking of being Super Brave and Going Out To Events All By Oneself: I had a great time rearranging the furniture at home with the boys on Saturday night!! I made a delicious satay and whipped up some yummy roti to go with it, but I made the roti with a mixture of plain flour, besan (chickpea flour) and hemp flour, just to make them brilliant.

    Did you have a good Monday?

    Oh, before I forget, sorry to Aunty Deebs and Grandy, autocorrect changed "bbffs" to BBC's in my last post. Love to you both.

    Just a quick little message tonight.

    Love you my friend.

    🌻birdy xo
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  19. Peppermintbach
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    3 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Darling friend/beautiful birdy (and a wave to all)

    Thank you so very much for your encouragement. That means a lot, dear friend. This will be an interesting experience (or awkward and uncomfortable). We will see ;)

    I figured if I continued as I am now, where would that lead me? I think we both know the answer to that one...

    I went to work on Monday, which went reasonably quickly. Then I spent some time thinking/reflecting in the evening about certain things. I also planned my outfit for the upcoming art thing. My mood plummeted later in the evening though. Been feeling a little down, but I suppose a lot of people are; I feel that’s just life sometimes.

    What a delicious meal you made! I love roti, especially when it is served fresh. I’ve never made it but I’ve ordered it at Malaysian restaurants in the past. But I don’t think their recipe is fully plant based (please don’t quote me as I might be wrong), so it’s great that you have a vegan version. I take it was your famous satay that you made. Scrumptious!

    I’m very happy to hear that you enjoyed your Saturday night. Your boys are always such great company and I bet your house is looking fabulous :)

    Thank you so much again for being here for me. I always love your visits, enjoy talking to you and wholeheartedly appreciate you.

    How is your week going, dear friend?

    Much love to you too xoxox
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  20. Birdy77
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    4 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Hello my friend ❤

    I would love to hear what outfit you have planned for this weekend's Thing! I enjoy getting ready for events and such, planning outfits, hair, face etc. It's fun.

    Hey, if you have an awkward time, not to worry, you can tell me about it and we can have a laugh. If you end up finding some people to chat to, all the better, but it's not necessary.

    It's a stepping stone to new, different horizons.

    I felt sad hearing of your mood plummeting, but I wasn 't surprised. I see you as a very reflective, introspective, thinking soul, and I think it's inevitable that often this will lead to sadness, pain, hurt, especially when you get into the reflective zone. It's a beautifully painful quality. If only more people were like you.

    When I was making my satay I thought "you should write this down so Pepper can make it: I promise I will one day soon 😊

    I found something in a book today that I wanted to share with you I should have marked it, but I didn't so I have to go through the book again to find it.

    I shall return.

    ❤❤❤

    🌻birdy xo
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  21. Peppermintbach
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    5 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Darling friend/beautiful birdy (and a wave to all),

    How lovely to see you here. Always heartfelt gratitude for your friendship, insight and compassion. Thank you, dear friend....

    I also really enjoy getting ready for events too. A famous person once said she actually enjoyed getting ready to go out more than going out itself :)

    A dress and tossing up between stilettos or heeled boots for the art thing. So it’s weighing up a stylistic choice of a little more glamour or a little more “edge.” Figuring out which pair of earrings as well and my makeup too :)

    Thank you for your kindness and gentle reassurance. That means a lot, dear friend. See how the art thing goes... I definitely want to try to mingling though.

    It sounds like you were reading something very interesting yesterday. I’m curious and would love to hear more about it...you seem to do a fair amount of reading, which is great. If there’s anything else you would like to share or discuss from that source (or otherwise), I’m all ears.

    It’s all good. Please take your time with the satay recipe. It sounds delicious and while I would love to learn it, there’s absolutely no rush...just when and if you have the time and feel like writing it down ;)

    Do you have any weekend plans, dear friend?

    I think of you often and send warmth, compassion and love to you. Also, I’m sending some gentle hugs, in case you might need them. You can share those hugs with your boys too if you like :)

    Pepper xoxox

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  22. Birdy77
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    6 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Dear beautiful friend,

    I just wanted to pop in and say I hope you have fun at the Art Thing, and also have fun preparing, pump some music maybe, enjoying dolling-up 😊 your outfit sounds lovely either way - see how the mood strikes you.

    I hope you enjoy the art, and that maybe you get to chat to an interesting person or two. Love to hear how it goes.

    Do I have any plans? Well if this morning's shenanigans are anything to go by, I shall be spending most of today fishing a certain boy out of the chook pen every 5 or so minutes. I've fixed three sections of fence already, he has developed ninja moves which are really, really annoying!! I had to laugh at one point I saw him doing it and he looked just like a monkey. Then i put my stern face back on before he saw me 🤨

    Apart from that thrilling proposition, not much on the cards for me except there's a chance mrs b may come home 😊 but not getting my hopes up. I might dye my hair. The weather is forecast for more of your avatar, so I won't be doing too much outside anyway, but if it holds up for a while I might go for walk at the beach, amongst the dark clouds.

    I haven't found that thing I wanted to share yet, but I will.

    Thanks for the hugs, some back for you too ❤

    🌻birdy xo
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  23. Birdy77
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    6 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Very Yummy Vegan Satay 😊

    1. Heat a tablespoon or so of oil (eg. Coconut Oil, Peanut Oil, Rice Bran Oil etc) in a pan, and add a medium chopped onion.

    2. Add a couple of chopped or minced cloves of garlic and sautee this with the onion for a few minutes.

    3. Grate/shred a block of tofu (eg. 350g) and add this to the pan. Cook this for a few minutes, stirring. If the tofu sticks to the bottom, don't worry because we will be adding liquid which will lift it.

    4. Add to the pan: (these are approximate measures and can be amended);
    1 tbsp soy sauce,
    2 tsp curry powder (or maybe a smidge more),
    3 tbsp peanut butter
    2 tsp vegan Worcestershire sauce,
    3 tsp sugar
    2 chilli / sweet chilli sauce.

    5. Stir to combine.

    6. Add some veg such as frozen corn kernels, chopped baby spinach, chopped broccoli.

    7. Pour in a can of coconut milk. Stir and reduce to a simmer.

    8. It will thicken as you cook it, add some hot water if needed.

    9. Serve with roti and/or jasmine rice, chopped coriander if you like it, and some hemp seeds sprinkled on top if you have them.

    ❤❤❤
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  24. Peppermintbach
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    7 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Darling friend/dear birdy (and a wave to all),

    What an honour to learn the recipe . That means a lot as I know how much you enjoy cooking. birdy’s special satay recipe. I can’t wait to try it one day :) Thank you so very much, dear friend...

    Hopefully beautiful mrs b returns sooner than later, but I also understand that you don’t want to get your hopes up, just in case. I know you have been missing her beautiful company & presence. I would love to know when she returns, whenever that may be. Just so I can rejoice/celebrate with you :)

    How can anyone get cross at your boy’s cheeky ways? Annoying at times, yes, but I bet he knows how adorable & loved he is, so that’s probably why he tests your patience ;) Was your stern face effective?

    Congratulations on fixing 3 sections of fence. That’s a major achievement and I’m very proud of you and happy for you. Impressive work!

    Did you end up going for a walk? I know weather that matches my avatar is probably not the best for outdoors activities. There are probably about 99 awful things related to rain & thunderstorms.

    But if nothing else, I once said if you see rain or a thunderstorm to think of it as me sending special blessings & love to you & your love, mrs b. That still stands :)

    Thank you, you’re very thoughtful & caring to think of me & wish me well. I enjoyed it & I’m glad that I went.

    It has been a bit of a rough week for various reasons, so I wasn’t really in the mood to socialise when time came. I was tempted to cancel but decided to follow through with my initial decision to go.

    It was an eclectic mix of people. I ended up spending most of my time talking to a small group of people. Met some interesting characters & I was glad that I didn’t cancel. The art was okay; I didn’t love it or hate it. In some ways, neutral is worse.

    My mood wasn’t so great even 30 minutes before the art thing started. I tried to let it just ebb and flow as much as I could. Let it run its natural course, with minimal obstruction or analysis from me. I don’t necessarily do that when I’m at work, dealing with family, other obligations, etc as grit, pushing through, etc applies. But outside those Walls of Duty & Obligation, I try to allow myself that space.

    Thank you again for being here and for sharing your satay recipe. I actually have all the ingredients except for the vegan Worcestershire sauce.

    As always, I’m very grateful for your friendship. How fortunate are those of us who get to call you friend?

    Love you xoxox

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  25. Birdy77
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    7 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Dear gorgeous friend,

    I'm so pleased you went and enjoyed yourself! It can be so tempting, & so easy to cancel these things when we're not in the mood, especially when you were feeling blah 30 minutes prior. It's excellent that you went, even if the art wasn't up to much.

    I'm glad you got to meet & chat to a few interesting folk. Crowds at these things can be very unpredictable can't they? Did you decide to wear the boots or the stilettos in the end?

    I'm sorry to hear you had a rough week darl - is there anything you wanted to get off your chest? I felt bad the other day, I feel like I glossed over when you said your mood plummeted, I meant to ask you if you wanted to talk anything through, but I didn't, I'm really sorry. I am always here for you.

    I'm happy you now have the satay recipe, it's an easy dinner that is made in under half an hour. All the amounts are approximate, I don't use measuring spoons , I just whack it in, so I had to sort of estimate. With the sweet chilli sauce it should be approx 2 tbsp ... I just wrote 2 sweet chilli sauce. Cups full? Buckets full? Let's just keep it at tablespoons for now. Oh!! And!! I left out an important detail, sprinkle with crushed peanuts, even yummier if you can dry fry them in a non stick pan first. Oh!! And!! Make it a hard or extra firm block of tofu (not silken).

    Yes cheeky monkey I think knows he's a bit too cute, so tests the old patience. I won this battle because he didn't get into the girl's pen today. Score One for me. Hope I haven't jinxed myself.

    I had a great day today, I spent it playing all day in my veg patch. One of my compost heaps was ready for it to be forked out & onto the garden. One of my favourite things to do! I love compost, it is such an incredibly cool thing to witness the whole beautiful cycle. It seriously gives me a lot of joy.

    Did you have a nice relaxing Sunday?

    mrs b is hoping to come home tomorrow, it will be lovely to have her home after a month!

    I think I might have blabbed on too long, my character counter no longer works, so it's always a guess for me now!

    Love you xoxo
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  26. Peppermintbach
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    8 July 2019 in reply to Birdy77

    Darling friend/ beautiful birdy (& a wave to all)

    That’s wonderful news! I hope mrs b comes home today too :) That will be a very special reunion.

    What a precious, tender moment it will be. You must have so much to catch up on in person. It will be so comforting to have her by your side again, in person, again. I really hope you see her again today/tonight :)

    I’m glad your stern face was effective. Your boy might get too used to it after a while though. So maybe start practising alternative facial expressions (just in case) ;)

    I’m very happy you had such a lovely Sunday. I know your garden is your sanctuary; a place of peace, healing & nurturing. Witnessing the compost cycle sounds truly magical.

    I feel your ability to nurture is moving; it seems to come so naturally to you. I think that quality in you is lovely.

    Do you have any garden or home projects this week?

    Thanks so much again for sharing your recipe. I’m moved that you made time & put in effort to write it for me. I prefer rough estimates over precise measurements in cooking ;) The fried peanuts with the satay sounds delicious!

    Lovely friend, please don’t apologise as I feel there’s seriously no need. I know it comes from a place of caring because you’re a very thoughtful & compassionate person. But it’s okay, you have nothing to be sorry for.

    I ended up opting for the stilettos for the art thing :) Sunday was rough. Went out for dinner with friends and had a few drinks. That helped dull the ache for a bit & when the alcohol wore off, I had a little cry.

    I think it’s a range of things getting to me. But I also feel there’s not much that I can do other than let it run its course (or at least when I can). I don’t say this as a defeatist, but because I have a certain awareness of how my own emotions work.

    So I just let my mood ebb & flow when I can & as much as I feel able to at any given point in time. Try to let it wash over me when I’m not fulfilling a duty/obligation.

    Outside of obligation/duty, if I feel down, I feel down & if I feel joy, I feel joy. The same concept applies to other emotions. I just try to let it all run its natural course.

    Thanks again for your gorgeous company here. As always, if you ever want/need to talk about anything, ups & downs (full breadth of human emotions & experiences), you have a friend in me. Free rein ;)

    My love to your beautiful self and your beautiful mrs b. I hope you have a wonderful reunion. Love you xoxox

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  27. Ggrand
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    8 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hello Gentle Peppy, and sweet Birdy..,

    If it’s okay I would also like to say how happy I am for you that Mrs b will hopefully be home tonight, a lovely warm celebration for her home coming lovely lady....🎊🎉🎀..Oh Birdy I’ll just drop these at yours 🥁🎹🎷🎺🎸🎼🎤🎧..The grandees (Deebi band) will do a gig free of charge for you tonight...we’ve been practicing..We’re quite good now...but just in case..🎧🎧🎧..one for you..Mrs b , and Peppy.....

    Peppy....I was saddened to read you had a little cry after the alcohol wore off after your night out..That’s okay sweety...it’s okay to cry...I feel it’s the only way to cleanse our soul....🤗 soul hugs Peppy..I wish it was so much different for you dear friend...I wish you could have a life of happiness....

    Its good you went to the art thing..it sounds like it lifted your spirits a bit and you enjoyed your night out...Wow you must have good balance being able to walk in stilettos...When I was young we used to have platforms..😂kind of walking on small stilts...with our feet flat..stilettos I think your walking tippie toes all the time....

    I think it’s good thinking that you let your moods go with the ebb and flow of life...maybe that’s how the universe intended us to live....I’m not sure....Gee isn’t it hard to work ourselves out...one day I know we all will....

    Birdy I loved hearing you say you had a great day playing in your veggie patch and compost heap....enjoy precious lady....that’s what a part of life is for....enjoying ourselves...and it doesn’t matter how we do it...as long as we do.....I hope your doing good dear lovely friend.

    Oh That recipe sounds yummy...I do like tofu..I 🤔 think...I can’t remember.....

    I hope you both have a lovely week with good time outweighing the bads....

    Love, care and warm soul hugs to you both 🤗💖💜 and anyone reading...that means you bbff🤗💜..and the others....

    Grandy...

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  28. Birdy77
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    9 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Hello there my friends 😊

    Wow Grandy, you & Deebs are such amazing musicians. A little birdy told me (😁) that you have been practicing over on Sir Croix's iceberg at 3am - you can really tell, the Grandees are totally rockin it.

    I have the most incredible idea. This is going to blow your minds. Are you ready? You know Aunty Deebsta's Beasty Beanies? Well, why don't you record The Grandees music inside those so that when you say "Ready Please Mr Music" The Grandees plays? Is that the most brilliant idea you've heard all day?????

    Thank you for being happy for mrs b's return. It's lovely to have her home at least for a little while. She will have to go back at some point, but hopefully will be able to stay home for a couple of weeks 🤞. She has had time off work without pay, so she is keen to get back to work as well. So much drama going on up there 🙁. She breathed such a sigh of gratefulness to be home as soon as she was in the house. The boys went bananas.

    I am glad you went out to dinner with some friends on Sunday my friend, I hope that made the day a little better for you at least for a few hours. I'm sorry the rest of the day was so rough.

    It's really good that you are able to let the emotions come and go as you do. I think allowing that takes some practice, but ultimately I think that's the answer to life's problems, so you're sure onto something there.

    I understand, you have a range of various things going on that are making life rough for you. Please know I am always here for you if you want to talk anything through.

    After I posted the satay recipe to you I keep thinking if these things to add! If you have coconut aminos, add some of that with the soy sauce etc. Worth getting some anyway if you like having stir fries etc. Grandy, maybe you can try the recipe too? I have only recently started enjoying tofu in the last couple of years because I didn't really know how to use it in a yummy way before. Now I make loads of things with it including very delicious vegan ricotta - it goes wonderfully, for instance, in spanakopita and spinach & ricotta canneloni/ravioli or pasties etc. Really easy to make too.

    Darl, thank you for the tip on practicing some different facials, I need them because the score since I last updated you is cheeky boy 7, me 0.

    I better stop because i might have run out of room.

    xoxoxo me
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  29. Peppermintbach
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    10 July 2019
    Hi gorgeous Grandy (& a wave to all),

    The grandees sound like they know how to put on a show & have a good time. How generous and thoughtful to perform for mrs b’s homecoming. I’m sure she felt very honoured that you thought of her :)

    Thank you for the very tender well wishes, lovely one. That warmed my heart.

    I like the sound of your old platforms. You still see plenty of them in shops & online these days. They would now be considered retro or vintage :)

    I’m still figuring out the ebb & flow thing, but I‘ll spare you my musings. Thanks again for thinking of me and writing to me. It’s lovely to see your gorgeous self here. Love and care xoxo

    Darling friend/ dear birdy,

    I’m so happy & relieved that you have mrs b by your side again (in person). Even though it will only be for a couple of weeks, I think it’s still very special to see her for a bit. She sounds as though she is happy to be home too. I’m smiling for both of you & your dogs (a reunited family).

    Things sound very stressful at your in-laws place. You must feel for mrs b. She’s going through so much, and leave without pay must be adding another layer of unneeded stress. I’m thinking of her, but I know she has your support & love, and that is something very special :)

    I had to look up coconut aminos as I hadn’t heard of it before. Thanks for the tip! I’m glad you’re exploring tofu more these days. It’s very versatile because it absorbs flavour easily. I’m actually pretty familiar with tofu ;)

    Thank you, I really don’t have the whole ebb & flow thing down pat. I’m still learning a lot. It’s an evolving process. It’s definitely not easy & I still struggle with it.

    I have been teary a lot lately. Too many things to be able to articulate. It’s hard to explain because it’s a range of issues...

    But it really does mean a lot that you’re here for me, dear friend. That genuine sentiment/offer alone is comforting & reassuring. If you ever need to unload any struggles/pain or just chat, I’m here for you too...please know that...as always, free rein :)

    In happier news, I’ll be going to an innovation/technology/science thing later this week. I’ve never been to anything like that before so I’m excited. I’m trying out more things that pique my interest to experience more & meet new people :)

    How have you been, dear friend?

    Thank you for being the beautiful person you are. Sending love to you, mrs b & your boys xoxox
    2 people found this helpful
  30. Birdy77
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    Birdy77 avatar
    2299 posts
    10 July 2019 in reply to Peppermintbach
    Hello friend ❤

    Well things haven't really gone to plan and our family reunion was short lived. She's gone again 😔

    I'm sorry you've been teary darl, but on the other hand, it's better to cry when you need to cry, rather than holding it all in. I understand if you don't want to talk about it. But I am sitting and listening if you feel like talking it through.

    Sometimes I just sit and cry and cry, and it's just a bunch if stuff accumulated, not a specific thing. I understand.

    With the ebb and flow thing, I think that is the human experience, not to have a total grip on it ... I think that is why spiritual teachers etc call these stuff "practice". You know, that's what monks do, that's what spiritual leaders do, they "practice" ... even they don't purport to be experts, so I think it's a natural thing for some periods, some days, some moments, to be better than others. The fact that you're aware of it, and in touch with what's going on for yourself is a wonderful thing.

    Wow, you have such an awesome array of interests, I'm so pleased to hear you are going to this science/technology/innovation fair. It's so cool that you are planning all these events to step out of your comfort zone. It's brilliant! Please let me know how it goes?

    Love

    🌻birdy xoxo
    2 people found this helpful

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