Thank you so much for your thoughtful post, I've been trying to get back to you all day, sorry hon. Its been such a demanding day so far, and I wanted to write to you when I felt more present.
I'm really amazed and inspired by the many different ways you've found healing in your life. I know we started off talking about avoiding feelings, but look at all the wonderful healing things you have sought out personally, through your healing instinct. I find that amazing.
I personally value a lot of the major investments you've made during your life, such as caring for birds, learning an Instrument to a professional performance standard, being part of a good music community and teaching. I like the folk people too, I wish I was more a part of it sometimes. Woodford is not far from here, I really liked what they put on for new years eve.
My creativity outside of my job has been slackening too. I'm not sure why. It could just be because I'm so fullfilled from other things. But there's some creative things I want to do, and I would feel better if I finished them. I have bird paintings I want to finish for a local show, I started last year. I like this show, the place where its held. The art show attracts a lot of Australian wildlife lovers I want to know those people.
I'm more stumped with music. I can produce music on a computer and I keep keyboards . In my early 20's I arranged soundtracks for documentaries and short films, I won a couple of film festival awards that made me feel I should keep going. And then I wound up teaching film and TV production to students at a university. My sound track production knowledge was very valuable there. It was a great job for a while. So to answer your question, I guess I mainly jam, keep up my technical skills in computer music production, and worry about the time and money I put into it :)
Anyway, thanks again Pam, I will try to write again soon. I have had wholly dependent birds for 5 days and nights straight, with terrible fungal infections as well bacterial infections, and they are still holding on. At this point, I have to support them in 30 minute increments, its so hard on them. I am amazed by how much they fight for life.
Hope to talk soon :)