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Forums / PTSD & Trauma / Bullying in high school shaping adult life

Topic: Bullying in high school shaping adult life

4 posts, 0 answered
  1. MT92
    MT92 avatar
    1 posts
    21 September 2020

    Hi all,

    I recently have found out my brother was severely bullied in high school 10+ years ago and it has negatively impacted his adult life in a pretty serious way.

    I knew back at the time he was getting some grief but I was busy skipping school etc and stupidly put it down to just the usual high school issues I thought every kid faced and didn’t really think much of it.

    I have very recently learnt due to him telling me briefly the extent of the bullying being both very physical and emotional with regular beatings and emotional bullying all due to things that were made up about him from another student. As a result I am now seeing him struggle with depression, anxiety, and what seems to be in my unprofesssional opinion ptsd like symptoms. He now doesn’t like to be very social, has trouble trusting many people and is quite withdrawn from most things. He also doesn’t look after his health overly well. I took time to do some research and it led me to lost here for some help.

    How can I help him in any way to encourage him to get back to his former self or to get a positive outlook on life again. I don’t want to come on too strongly and cause him to shy away from the issues or not want to confide in me which may cause more issues being that I’m one of very few that he can talk to.

    I’ve always had very strong mental health so it’s hard for me to put myself in his shoes to be able to help in some way. Any advice would be super.

    thanks in advance :)

  2. white knight
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    white knight avatar
    9749 posts
    21 September 2020 in reply to MT92
    Hi , welcome

    It's wonderful to see such care for a sibling.

    Sometimes professional care is the core of recovery. But you can assist by-

    - taking him to motivation lectures
    - books on positive thinking

    Google-

    YouTube maharaji prem rawat appreciate

    Beyondblue topic bullying

    Beyondblue topic capacities and expectations

    Beyondblue topic only the strongest survive, make it YOU

    Beyondblue topic being positive- what's the secret?

    Beyondblue topic 30 minutes can change your life

    Beyondblue topic motivation - search and rescue it

    Beyondblue topic the best praise you'll ever get

    Beyondblue topic feeding your brain

    I hope those help.

    TonyWK
  3. Hobbit339
    Hobbit339 avatar
    2 posts
    24 September 2020 in reply to MT92
    Hi I understand what your brother has gone through as I have gone through the same and it has completely destroyed me as an adult I don't function properly and have been unemployed most of my life as I can't stand being around people as I don't trust them and have withdrawn from the world around me out of shame and fear, I think your brother may have ptsd as that's what I have found that I have by going to a psychologist recently , my advice is to try and see if he would see one as I don't want your brother to make the same mistakes I have made. It will be hard for him as he may feel fear or shame and talking about it will be one of the hardest things he will do in life, I hope your brother gets well, it will take a long time for him to recover , stay strong and stay safe.
  4. romantic_thi3f
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    romantic_thi3f avatar
    3151 posts
    25 September 2020 in reply to MT92

    Hi MT92,

    Welcome to the forums and thank you for being here - It's really kind and caring of you to be reaching out for your brother. Even if he might not say or show you this, it's the best thing to have someone by your side when you are struggling.

    Do you think your brother would be open to some professional help? Or open to talking with others? There's so many avenues of support to try - TonyWK mentioned positive lectures and books on positive thinking, but there's also videos on mental health, self-help books, online programs, fact sheets and of course therapy.

    It really depends on the person and where they are at - we can never force anyone to get help, but gentle and supportive nudges can definitely help steer them in the right direction.

    Looking forward to hearing from you again - for what it's worth, never underestimate the power of just being there for someone.

    rt

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