My heart goes out to you as you face the thoughtless and deeply painful actions of others. I feel for you so very much and admire you so deeply for so many reasons.
I'm so glad you found a therapist who was able to raise you to a greater sense of consciousness, self esteem and sense of direction. It's a gift when we come across someone who can raise us in such powerful mind altering ways. Raising our own self can be so confusing and thoroughly exhausting at times that it's a relief when someone shows up in our life to speed up the process and shed much needed light on it, especially when the challenges are so complex and overwhelming.
Those who dare question the reasons for ending the 'friendships', I would question them. While you show incredible effort in coming to understand yourself, others will feel more comfortable letting themselves off the hook, regarding self questioning:
(Questions for others)
- Do you understand why you are so dismissive and unsupportive of me?
- Do you understand what it has taken me to get through the deeply painful emotional challenges I've faced, to finally reach this point of greater self esteem?
- Do you understand the level of disrespect you show me?
- Do you understand why you don't question your self to the degree that you should?
Just a handful of many questions.
It's amazing how mind altering greater self esteem can be. It's amazing how much clarity it can provide.
There is a brilliant book, in my opinion, called 'Six Pillars of Self-esteem', by Nathaniel Branden. All 6, when practiced regularly can be mind altering and life changing: The practice of living consciously, self acceptance, self responsibility, self assertiveness, living purposefully and personal integrity. I know, easier said than done, regularly practicing such things but I believe you are off to a great start. You have taken responsibility in raising yourself, your consciousness, and accepting yourself as someone who deserves better. You're integrating your moral principals into your life, to set boundaries/guidelines for your self and others, which reflects personal integrity. You're asserting yourself in reaching life changing goals, something that demands respect. And while I believe our ultimate purpose for being here comes down to raising our self and others, we may often face those who refuse to be raised, those who choose a lack of responsibility and consciousness. Do not let their choices lead you to self doubt.
You are a powerful person :)