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Forums / PTSD & Trauma / Recent unresolved trauma from childhood content warning - servere bullying in primary school

Topic: Recent unresolved trauma from childhood content warning - servere bullying in primary school

2 posts, 0 answered
  1. Themolequeen
    Themolequeen avatar
    4 posts
    6 September 2020

    Hi, I'm new to this so I'm not sure how much to say

    I have dealt with more life than I can begin to process in 28 years, ranging from childhood trauma, medical trauma, and just life trauma in general. I have dealt with some of these traumas depending on my current situation and what I have needed to get through life.

    Lately, I've been going down a path of self-development and feeling like I am ready to embrace this journey and feeling like it's the right time.

    I had forgotten about the trauma for quite a long time (many years) until only recently.

    I can remember transferring to a new school at the end-of-year one, and in year 2 I was friends with everyone. I can remember a McDonald's birthday party and even the popular girls were there, but in year 3 I developed bites or something on my body all up my legs and arms. I don't know how they happened, I just remember hearing in the background that I would get them at my Father's place on visits because the house wasn't very clean, maybe bed bug bites or something? I can remember they use to be so itchy and as a child, I didn't have the self-control to not scratch. I would have calamine lotion on them and I guess this was not a good look with orange blotchy dots, and it made me a target. I went from being popular and well like to the 'queen of germs'. I didn't have a single friend until high school. I would avoid all the kids to avoid being bullied. I used to sit by myself every recess and lunchtime, and because of this, I don't think I actually know how to have proper conversations. I think it's a combination of not knowing what to say and the fear of being rejected. I'm seeing the uni counsellor on Tues (we have had a few sessions previously but nothing this full-on) and I want to work through this but I'm not sure how to bring it up

    thanks so much for your help :)

  2. Ggrand
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Ggrand avatar
    9846 posts
    6 September 2020 in reply to Themolequeen

    Hello Dear Themolequeen...

    Welcome to the forums..

    Children can be so cruel, without knowing the damage it does to us later on in life...I’m deeply sorry that happened to you.... Maybe something has triggered you enough for your trauma to resurface....

    I am pleased that your seeking help at Uni with their councillor..You asked how to bring it up...Even though that is very hard to do..please try as hard as you can to disclose your struggling with the bullying when you were at school...if it’s to hard to verbally tell the councillor..maybe you can write it out on paper what you want or feel to tell him/her...I have done this a couple of times...Another way which others have done..is to show the councillor your post you have written above...

    I am wishing you all the good luck I have and hope so much that you’re able to disclose about the bullying...

    Talk here anytime you feel up to it or need to..we are all here for you.

    Sending you my kindest wishes with care..

    Grandy..

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