also... there is somewhere deep in the rules a guideline about not talking about users "behind their back" on here

so if someone says a comment on a thread and u think it's stupid, then to go back on ur thread and say (in a way that is clear which user it is talking about, or even naming them) - oh my gosh, someone said something so stupid to me on another thread....

totally against the style here, and although we feel sometimes like we're in a private space, all users can see all threads, so they could very likely be reading along and get upset. This space is for all of us to feel wanted, included and part of something. So there's no real private areas to vent about other users. I've seen this quite often happen here and it is upsetting.

Hi LJpd81,

The search “button” (a small magnifying glass) is located on the very top of the page, on the right hand side, just underneath the BB 1300 number.

Hope this helps.

wow that is appalling Sleepy - I had no idea, only stick to a few threads - thanks for writing/pointing it out here - i hope the moderators take note of this. I think that should be the number one 'no-no' to look out for and be moderated. That sort of stuff hurts. I have had heaps of posts moderated for much lesser stuff than that. I think priority needs to be given to that which you have mentioned.

Hi Amberlite

If memory serves we have spoke before and good on you for speaking your mind. Matchy (Mark) is like myself and maybe other members too with just wanting a safe place to post without being challenged

You mentioned 'Challenging our sick thinking is our only hope and I would like to see a lot more of it' I havent read the term 'sick thinking' before..Just for myself I found that harsh...and Matchy obviously did too

The forums dont exist for us to challenged at all.....That is up to our specialist and/or a GP with a strong mental health focus and ourselves to commit to frequent ongoing appointments where we can be challenged

The Beyond Blue Moderators do great work in keeping this National forum a safe place to be

my kind thoughts...Paul

Hi again Everyone!

Is there a distinction about what can be posted in one's own thread, and what can be posted in another persons thread?

Like if I'm wanting to write a poem I'd find it impolite to post it anywhere else but my own anti-movement or the Poem thread, and thus wouldn't likely post it into a rookie bb thread.

i dont mind tobe challenged, with love, from ppl i've spoken to a little bit on here.

but harshly doing so is a recipe for disaster imo.

It's good though to speak your mind and be truthful, from love, but that is a fine line.
I don't know the specific situations, but we can't teach or force anyone to be our own idea of "well" - i wish it were that simple, bt it doesn't work. That said, if we have a good rapport with someone we can give input or suggestions safely. My MH practitioner always says "i can't always agree with u" and i like that - u can disagree and see things differently, but to tell someone they are doing xyz wrong or living their life wrong is probably going to do more damage than value. In that respect, I agree with the moderators statement here that this is best done by counsellors.

Also for our own good, if we try and counsel anyone here, (innocently, and with good intentions to help) it might end up just hurting US more. Because we don't know exactly how to, and might take their refusal to listen personally.

It's hard, but i think the best support and growth i've experienced here has been more from a listening ear, and honest empathy and occasional feedback, rather than specific advice to do abc

Hello Matchy, we hope you are still reading the comments that so interest you, please don't let one comment by someone destroy all the hard work you have achieved on the forums.

Your work has been greatly appreciated and do hope to see you again.

Geoff.

Without the benefits of gesture and inflexion (also the lack of visual cues from noting reactions in face to face interaction), it is very much left to the reader to infer meaning.
In text alone, language is quite inferior to adequately express oneself. This creates a sort of paradox within the mental health forum space where participants are often highly attuned to negative connotations (self worth, belonging, pleasing others), and some degree of accountability must rest with the reader to understand that posts are rarely made to deliberately chastise the individual for their predicament or beliefs. This also applies to those who empathise with how a post is received where replies in solidarity only result in degrading the potentially unwitting responder, and thus perpetuating the cycle.
Posing differing views is usually an attempt to provide another way to conceptualise a situation and rise above any sense of helplessness, and yet it is these differences that can lead the reader/recipient into feelings of deprecation.
For this reason, any perceived inappropriate posts should be directed to moderators and not pursued in the public environment. I reiterate that anonymity in responses would negate individual retribution (without absolving accountability). Sensitivity in replies is not limited to those seeking assistance and care should be taken to afford such respect regardless of context.
To remedy this, classifying posts (with simple color coding - light colors, pastel shade) can allow some control for the OP to select the intensity of outcomes sought to help meet expectations:
1] Reassurance (pink);
2] Comforting Support (blue);
3] Relevant Advice (green);
4] Options to try (orange);
5] even those seeking a Critical Response (duly qualified, naturally) to challenge their way of thinking (red);

Notwithstanding the above, I have never encountered any directly offensive replies. Although easily misdirected, some consideration of another's point of view (and right to hold such view) is the very nature of forum support, and simply recognising this attribute might even be regarded as part of the solution.

i don't think i've seen offensive replies intentionally, but i have seen very discriminatory things said, stereotyping, agist comments etc... stuff like that which would affect me even not directed at me.
I think also sometimes the terms we use to talk about metnal health in 2021, need some finetuning.
Some language is stigmtising and calling ppl crazy for example or saying that ppl with BPD are toxic might hurt some ppl's feelings. It's also not true.
But with my own mental health problems i've found i'm too tired and drained to fight negative stigmas.
In hospital a man referred to another ptient as "the disabled guy" because the guy had schizophrenia. I felt very upset even though that wasn't directed at me. Calling someone disabled is offensive. I think calling ppl with BPD manipulative and dangerous is also a little unfair, it's a form of chronic PTSD. I don't even know if i believe it exists, but i stand with my friends who have this daignosis as more repsentational of the trauma thy have survived than an indictment on their character. Since this is a mental health forum, judgements of any form of distress, diagnosis, or situation others may be in hits hard. We're all going through it. So we should realise how hard it hurts to b stigmatised.

Hi Sleepy21

I like your reminders about language and feel bb has a role here to help educate forum participants.

It can all be a little confusing and subjective when it comes to language. For example, is saying someone is disabled offensive if it’s accurate? Is talking about MH and disability offensive?

I ask because it’s entirely possible that a person can be disabled by a MH condition and qualify for the NDIS or other similar supports. My daughter has OCD and it is considered a disability with a range of educational and financial supports available to her.

Just food for thought.

I know I would appreciate some guidance with regard to correct lingo to avoid causing offence.

Kind thoughts to you

hello, sick meaning= affected by physical or mental illness. I also believe in the laws of the universe Cause and Effect. If I interpret poorly then I feel poorly. That is how it happens for me. I am not an emotional person I am a physical person and when physical people hit rock bottom Well the outcome can be swift and irreversible. So we have a lot to learn from all types of people. People generally and no one specific. Amber does care

hi there,

i dont think the word disability for MH is always so easy to digest and i would not imagine speaking that wya to ppl wold help them. that's always my concern, does something help or harm?
some ppl really identify with being mentally ill, and also with their diagnoses, they use it as a way to say why they are the way they are. I don't like that so much, i feel like diagnoses are limited and some of the terms ppl use for mental health just put ppl down and make them feel different. but its up to the individual how they self-identify. If someone asks me about my "Mental Illness" i'll generally get upset and correct them, as that's not my wording of choice. theres an orginisation called stampede stigma (if you google stampede stigma) which has some interesting ideas and even a quiz :)

Hi Sleepy21

Thanks for sharing so much about yourself and providing honest insights. I always pick up something new from you, which makes me really think.

I will definitely look up the stampede stigma website:)

Kind thoughts to you

Id really love the ability to tag members 🙏

no no i think this is good. its going "excuse me for a second" and screaming your lungs out and coming back completely composed. how else do you regulate yourself

By adding and educational topic

Welcome ,Andrew ,to the forum and thanks for your suggestion.

What sort of educational topic would you like to see.?

You can use the search engine to choose a topic. There are quite few articles on depression anxiety and many other topics.

Hello, what does frustrate me, and it's been mentioned before, many times, is that you type out a reply to anybody or someone you are especially communicating with on a regular basis, only for the reply not to go through, as BB is under maintenance, that's what really irritates me, surely those who use the BB site often should be told, you need to respect people, isn't that what supporting those with a mental illness is all about.

Geoff.

Hi Geoff,

The onus on the member to check the notifications is more a case of chance rather than certainty.

How would you like to see a scrolling banner or watermark overlay that covers the whole screen/site (ideally with a countdown timer for the last minute updaters!) starting a few days prior so everyone knows when shut down will occur?

Design-wise, I think it shouldn't be too difficult as it could work similarly to 'layers' in photoshop.

Perhaps someone has an idea I can try ....for some unknown reason, after years on the forum, I cannot login on my phone. I am writing this on my desktop computer...I can access the BB forum site on the phone but cannot access My Threads...or even login. I persisted with trying to login...and it said "You are already logged in" but I am not. I can't contribute anything or access My Threads. any clues how I can use the Forum on my phone, as well as the computer.

I am not having any trouble with my phone except the BB Forum....thank you...Moon S x

HI Moon

I haven't come across quite that problem but I was finding it impossible to find my thread recently on my phone and for some reason restarting the phone a couple of times seemed to fix it.

I hope someone comes up with a better idea but might be worth a try?

How frustrating for you!

Hi Moon and Hanna

I used to be able to access the forum from my phone and it took me directly to the page that showed my threads. Since the most recent maintenance I can no longer do this. I wonder if there’s a connection?

Kind thoughts to you

Hi all,

I too am having problems getting to my threads on my phone since the last maintenance shut-down. I can do it, but it's long winded and very roundabout. Going to the home page, scrolling down to forum entries and hitting "join discussion" got me in. Very frustrating on an already tired and disoriented mind, especially when I have to do that for every single thread I want to check.

Blue.

I've had the same problem Summer Rose!

I tried to go on the forums last night, and it was offline for an hour or so? Whilst I realise that there are other resources like helplines (this may not be beneficial for everyone), I think we should be notified of when the forums/website is down & how long it will take, like send us an email.

Hi mb20lover

always great to see you see you on the forums! Unfortunately we are only notified through the Welcome & Orientation thread re any upcoming maintenance on the forums. Maintenance is usually scheduled from midnight or 1am EST onwards. No one knows how long it will take as its Beyond Blue contractors doing the work. I think Geoff mentioned a similar issue above yet there wont be any email notifications to members

kindest always

Paul

Hello all..I seem to be back on to My Threads access on my phone. Don't ask me what I did..but it's almost it's old self again...strange times we live in...

Hi everyone

Just dropping in to give you an update - you may have seen we have a new thread open called 'Forums changes - updates thread'.

We've created this new thread to provide weekly updates on the work we're doing to upgrade and re-design the forums - work we're very excited to be embarking on.

We decided to create a new thread so that we can easily link people to it and to keep a designated space to talk about the upcoming changes.

However, we'd like to keep this thread open as well for ongoing feedback about broader issues / requests / feedback about the forums. This thread has been such a valuable source of insight so thank you for all the contributions you've provided.

As well as continuing to post your feedback here (which we are always reading), I encourage you to jump over to the new thread to check out the weekly updates and let us know what you think.

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/re-designing-and-upgrading-the-online-forums/forums-changes---updates-thread

Thank you so much !

Hi ProjectTeam!

The bb forums would improve imo, if > please develop a set of consistent Community Rules. 

Is there a way if and any thread/s someone has created themselves, that that person can then have access to their own list they have started.

I could go to 'My Threads' and scroll through page after page but this would take too long, maybe it could be put under 'My Account' (?)

I tried to remember the name of a thread I started a while ago and couldn't remember the title, so I typed in the search bar different titles but nothing appeared, simply because I typed the wrong name of the thread.

Geoff.