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Forums / Relationship and family issues / Blocked my stepsister

Topic: Blocked my stepsister

7 posts, 0 answered
  1. N0vaaa
    N0vaaa avatar
    4 posts
    7 September 2021

    Hi, ok so uhm, I just had a not so pleasant conversation with my stepsister.

    first let me just say that after moving away from my step mum because of reasons, my step sisters have not spoken with me at all, which left me upset. It has been a few years until I finally got a message from one of my stepsisters, yes it was very awkward and at first everything was fine, I wanted to forget everything that had happened.

    the next day she asked me for money because my dad told her too. (she had been asking him for money for a while now, she didn’t even have a full on conversation, all she wanted was money for her own enjoyment) obviously I didn’t give it to her because it was like we were strangers and I wanted to gain her trust again, after I said no she stopped talking to me for a few months. this made me lose the tiny bit of trust I had in her.

    a few days ago I overheard a phone call between her and my father, she wanted to come up to visit and I didn’t like the idea but I never said anything. Today she messaged me again and it was very awkward because I didn’t know what to say, once I told her I didn’t know what to say, I could see she was growing an attitude, I didn’t want to talk to her anymore and she got rude, calling my dads gf a wh**e …etc. obviously I got mad and told her not to say that, after insulting me/my family a little more, I blocked her.

    but I wanna know if that was the right thing to do?

    N0vaaa.

  2. white knight
    Community Champion
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    white knight avatar
    9216 posts
    7 September 2021 in reply to N0vaaa

    Hello, welcome here

    When you say "blocked her" I assume on facebook? If so, that is your Facebook page, not anyone elses. You have the right to make your Facebook site as safe as you can make it and that means sometimes, blocking people that become toxic to you.

    I think you did the right thing.

    So, when and if she visits your father, I would not be there, I'd go for a walk or stay in your room. Again you can exercise your rights not to have a relationship with whoever you decide to.

    From what you've said it sounds like she just wanted to use you.

    You can surround yourself with loving and considerate people, not waste time with those sorts.

    TonyWK

    1 person found this helpful
  3. Goldwing03
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Goldwing03 avatar
    27 posts
    7 September 2021 in reply to N0vaaa

    Hi N0vaaa,

    I do think you did the right thing- and I also think it was an extremely difficult thing to do! Don't feel bad for doing what you think is right for you and makes you feel comfortable. It's important to take steps while considering your wellbeing first.

    1 person found this helpful
  4. Isabella_
    Community Champion
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    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Isabella_ avatar
    129 posts
    7 September 2021 in reply to N0vaaa

    Hi N0vaaa,

    I think ultimately it's up to you whether you think it was a right decision or not. To be honest, I don't think there's a right or wrong here.

    You had a family member disrespect your boundaries, and only reached out to you seemingly to get something she wanted from you. She gave you attitude and disrespected you and your family, even when you told her not to.

    Whether they're family or not, you always have the right to decide who you want or don't want in your life. You making the decision to block her shows that you won't tolerate someone using you and disrespecting you, and that's a strong thing to do. You have the right to have supportive people in your life, and to distance yourself from people who disrespect you.

    I hope that she can grow from it and realise how she treated you was wrong, and hopefully you can both have a relationship again.

    1 person found this helpful
  5. N0vaaa
    N0vaaa avatar
    4 posts
    7 September 2021 in reply to white knight

    Hi White Night

    yes, Facebook. Thank you so much for your response and the advice. But I don’t think she’ll be coming up anymore, she said it herself, though I don’t know if it’s a lie so I’ll follow your advice!

    2 people found this helpful
  6. N0vaaa
    N0vaaa avatar
    4 posts
    7 September 2021 in reply to white knight

    Sorry I realised I spelt your name wrong 😅

    apologies

    2 people found this helpful
  7. geoff
    Life Member
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    geoff avatar
    15314 posts
    8 September 2021 in reply to N0vaaa

    Hello NOvaaa, you can never build any trust with someone who only wants to take advantage of you.

    She may supposedly be friendly because she wants something off you, but you don't know what she's telling other people behind your back.

    You definitely can't believe her if she says she won't come up anymore, she is too untrustworthy.

    Best wishes.

    Geoff.

    1 person found this helpful

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