Thanks Tony for your reply.
Thanks for sharing your story. I try to dance around my wife's moods, but it can be very difficult. She was brought up in a very volatile relationship, where her father verbally abused her mother and still does, so I take that into account.
I tried to move on a few years back when we were having the counselling, but my daughter became sick, so I stayed to assist with her. My children are very affected by this, have become very sensitive, especially my eldest. She's at her happiest at the moment and about to enter secondary school next year, so I am reluctant to rock the boat for her.
TBH, my wife has no real friendships, they have all started to disband her because they see her moods as well. She doesn't understand, and I try and help her, but I could never be straight with her, as she would go crazy. I believe my wife has Borderline, as she harmed herself a few years ago to try and get at me. This was when I tried to be upfront with her and we were on the brink of breaking up.
This was when my daughter got sick (mentally more so), and when she improved, it wasn't because WE sorted things out, it was because I wasn't doing the things I was doing.
My wife's depression results in her sleeping a lot too, and she has no motivation. I have been there to help her as much as I can. I moved further away from my job to move closer to her grandmother to assist her be with her in the last few years of her life and assisted by preparing documents with a family tribunal case with her grandmother as well, all without her asking me. It's because I care and love her, but in her eyes it's because I am insincere and have my own motivations...
My family are basically estranged. I don't talk to my brother, I talk to my father maybe 4 times a year, and mother maybe 6 times a year. This is all because she doesn't like them, and I have gone to them before and they have become involved, so now that has stained that relationship to the point where both my Mother and Father don't want to hear of any problems because I stayed with her.
I am really at a loss, as I want to stay with her, especially for my kids. I try everything for her, but it is never enough. I am struggling at work with my boss giving me unreasonable expectations, and have recently even thought about things I should never think about... I don't believe I would ever go there, but these thoughts do enter my head as to get rid of the situation.
Sorry, about all of this!!