Thank you mb20lover
I appreciate you sharing your veiw but i thinky my situation is slightly different to yours, not to devalue your experiences at all i might add i apprecuate you putting your own expereince out in a ln attempt to help!!
I have a very big friend group and a very solid support structure around me, but i dont feel anything, i only do things for my friends because i know that makes them like me not because i have any sense of passion or love for our friendship.
I dont make emotional connections with people full stop even within my family my mother is a lovely lively lady and i appreciate her to bits, but i dont think i feel about her any different than any of my female friends, like does love feel like anythibg different to that i dont know