I feel as if I can relate to your situation. I'm a 22 year old female, and got over my anxiety/fear of intimacy and dating in April this year. I had my first boyfriend for several months last year. Because I was unable to relax in situations that involved kissing or other intimacy, he realised it wasn't going to work. He was four years older, so that may not have helped. He said he loved my personality and who I was, but just was struggling with my "rigidity". He said he thought we could have a break, and then try again. I ended up telling him weeks later that I just wanted to be friends, and he understood, and there were luckily no hard feelings.
Earlier this year I was hanging out with an interstate friend one night, who I had a bit of a crush on. We were sitting on his couch and watching a movie. He suddenly turned to me and started full-on kissing me. It happened really fast, and I just kissed him back. I stopped before the kissing got well beyond my level, and apologised. He was really understanding and just thought I was nervous. I ended up admitting to him my difficulty with this sort of stuff, and he was really good about it. We had a nice night, but he said we should just be friends as he lives interstate and our lives are quite different. I found this hard, but I knew he was right. That night helped me get over my fear of intimacy. Because this guy was more confident and really kind, he actually helped me relax a bit when I was kissing.
The month after this (in May this year), I started going out with a guy in my friendship group. It turns out that about half the group predicted it! He had liked me this way for a while, but wasn't sure about my feelings. I didn't think properly about it since the night I kissed my friend the month before. I don't like to rush things, and I am not someone who is impulsive. However, the night with my interstate friend helped to push me out of my comfort zone. It was important that it was with someone I knew and trusted though.
Soon it will have been six months that I've been with my boyfriend. I am really happy and I love him a lot, and he feels the same way. Like you, I could never see myself overcoming this fear of dating and intimacy, but I have! It could just take the right person to nudge you out of your comfort zone (best if you know them and trust them).
I just wanted to let you know that things can suddenly change :)