Online forums

Before you can post or reply in these forums, please complete your profile

Complete your profile

Before you can post or reply in these forums, please join our online community.

Forum membership is open to anyone residing in Australia.

Join the online community Community rules

Forums / Relationship and family issues / Meth addiction destroying my family

Topic: Meth addiction destroying my family

4 posts, 0 answered
  1. JJmmaamm
    JJmmaamm avatar
    1 posts
    10 November 2018

    Hi thanx for reading my post.

    I have been married to my husband for the last 17 years and we have 3 beautifyl children. We have had our ups and downs but the last 2 years have been absolute hell.

    My husband is now addicted to meth. Every day is just a living nightmare. He is either completely high and loopy or coming down and extremelly angry and agitated.

    When he is high you dont see him. He stays awake for 3 to 4 days at a time and is actually quite pleasant. Then you just know the big crash is coming.

    He then becomes emotionally and verbally abusive to myself and the children. He refuses to work and barely earns any money. I am the one that has to support the family and pay the mortgage etc.

    We barely even talk to one another now. I sleep with one of my kids in the other side of the house so I am not anywhere near him.

    I have told him to leave on numerous occasions however he refuses to go. I dont have the money to go anywhere as every cent I earn pays for all the bills food etc. My parents live in a 2 bedroom house.and we simply couldnt fit.

    I dont think I should be the one to go as I am the one that has actually paid for the house and everything in it. I have legal advice and he vant be removed from the house as his name is on the title so effectively half his.

    Polive wont get involved as no domestic violence.

    Has anyone been in the same boat and can offer any advice. I just want him gone and out of our lives for good.

    Thnx for listening.

  2. blondguy
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    blondguy avatar
    8211 posts
    10 November 2018 in reply to JJmmaamm

    Hello JJmmaamm

    Welcome to the forums and especially with the pain you have been going through (thankyou for having the courage to reach out to us....you are strong JJ)

    As you are aware meth is a vile addiction. My friends son was (is) addicted to this poison and the rehab alone cost about $35,000 and he is still taking items from her home and reselling them for a hit. Can I ask you how your husband manages to pay for his meth?

    I am very sorry that your husbands addiction to this vile drug has affected you and your childrens lives. My heart really goes out to you on this as I have seen the behavior of a meth addict and the effect it has on a family JJ

    The police not wanting to get involved is bizzare as even possession of crystal meth is illegal...the last time I checked. The property issues are important yet so is the well being of you and your children too

    You mentioned that when he crashes he becomes emotionally and verbally abusive to you and the children. This is emotional abuse which is the same as physical abuse. There is no difference JJ

    I am a volunteer on the forums that has 35 years of experience where clinical anxiety/depressive illnesses are concerned.....however from what you have posted....the emotional abuse is also domestic abuse...its not on!

    Beyond Blue have links with the super gentle people on lifeline 13 11 14 who can offer excellent advice where a partner with a meth addiction is concerned. The counselors are qualified and non judgemental too!

    You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by making this one call JJ.

    We are here too of course. There are many gentle people on the forums that can be here for you as well JJ

    I hope you can post back with any thoughts/questions when its convenient for you JJ

    thankyou for being a part of the Beyond Blue forum family JJ

    my kindest thoughts for you in this difficult time

    Paul

  3. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    11100 posts
    10 November 2018 in reply to JJmmaamm

    Hello JJ, thanks for posting your comment and I have heard of similar circumstances from a couple of other people who have been addicted to meth and know what they are capable of doing, although it was hidden only for a short time.

    It's not pleasant at all to be with someone addicted to meth because you can never be sure what they will do next, and understand why you want him to leave and there are a couple of ways this can be done, not that I'm qualified to do so but first of all, I would be seeking advice from legal aid or a lawyer who offers 'no win -no fee' which I know you have, but maybe under a different situation, such as, another option would be to consider divorcing him then this would make it easier to remove his name.

    If you contact Anglicare they can provide housing for people in your situation, they also have counselling and financial support.

    Other places are Reachout, Headspace and BB.

    Please let me know how you go.

    Geoff.

    1 person found this helpful
  4. Rose36
    Rose36 avatar
    1 posts
    11 November 2018 in reply to JJmmaamm

    Hi JJmmaamm,

    I have been with my partner now for 18 years and we too have 3 children (10, 7 and 3 years). My partner also became addicted to meth. He began smoking it at work and then his addiction became worse and he was caught doing it at our home (we were renting at the time). He had several bad accidents, (car and motorbike) one where he was admitted to hospital for several days with a bruised lung and heart concerns. Each accident was caused from his over-confidence on the roads and even after the last more severe accident he continued to do the meth. He became suicidal and depressed, we got some help through a detox clinic, but he had to attend meetings where he could talk about his experiences with other drug addicted patients, I told him he would no longer see the children if he continued to smoke the poison and I moved away to my parents. That was the best but hardest decision I ever made, it was his 'wake-up' call. I'll never forget one of the therapists saying that people addicted to a particular drug need to make large changes to their lifestyle - change JOB, change HOME, change FRIENDS even change STATE if it is what is needed to break the habit. Luckily this worked for my partner, he is now 3 years sober and is playing basketball, coaching, a much better father to his children. But it was a long and stressful road. I hear you making the same excuses I did (but my mum and dad only have a 2 bedroom home etc, you can always sleep on the floor on a mattress like we did) whatever it takes hun to wake him up. It is hard, but it is so worth it. I wish you all the best, but remember this.....nothing will change if you continue doing what you are doing now xo

Stay in touch with us

Sign up below for regular emails filled with information, advice and support for you or your loved ones.


All done! You should’ve received a confirmation email, so please check when you’re finished here and click the link in the email. If you can’t see it, we might be in your junk mail.

Subscribe failed. Please try later or contact us.