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Topic: Motivation Lost

6 posts, 0 answered
  1. Marcsa
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Marcsa avatar
    54 posts
    19 July 2016

    Hi,

    I tried writing on another thread.....

    My son 22, feels like he is worthless because he can't finish his Uni assignments. He's had it for 2weeks and went away for one of those two weeks. Now the assignment due date is imminent. He's done - not much, claims he can't do it due to lack of resources from his Supervisors and also general lack of organisation. He says he feels worthless. He wants to be gone. All my suggestions to see someone or do something have received a " NO ". I'm only his mother, but I've reached beyond my limit. I tried just now, making him a sandwich, which initially he agreed to but has now rejected. I can't take it anymore. I'm agitated myself now.

    My son says nothing has helped or will, because of the pressure of the assignment and due date. Getting in to see a doctor, psychologist or anyone will be pointless because the urgency of the pressure will have passed.

  2. Apollo Black
    Apollo Black avatar
    401 posts
    19 July 2016 in reply to Marcsa

    Hi Marcsa

    i absolutely hated Uni assignments. I procrastinated, drank beer, got extensions,did everything at the last minute and crammed like you wouldn't believe. i remember even feeling like a toddler would having a tantrum because I felt like I couldn't do it - but I did. I made it in the end and I'm doing ok now.

    i only have a four year old so I can't really comment, but I'd leave him to it. Tell him you're there if you need him, but it's his journey. He needs to know the consequences of slacking off, and if he gets it done and passes good for him. If he's going to be a little princess and not want his sandwich don't offer again, he can make his own snack as long as he knows there's enough good stuff in the fridge.

    he can't have it all, including going away for a week with known responsibilities. I'm sorry if I'm niaive to potential mental issues (what does he mean by "wants to be gone?") but it sounds like he needs a kick up the bum

  3. white knight
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    white knight avatar
    9778 posts
    21 July 2016 in reply to Apollo Black

    Hi,

    Totally agree with apollo black.

    As parents we want to fix every hurdle our kids approach.

    At 17yo I joined the defence forces. He's 22yo...

    Time for him to make the time for his own responsibilities.

    Tony WK

  4. Marcsa
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Marcsa avatar
    54 posts
    23 July 2016 in reply to white knight
    HI, well, ... I got a call from the Acute Care Team at our local Hospital who said if he gets this way again, I need to take him in or call an ambulance. Maybe what I thought what I said previously was not the whole picture......Things are somewhat better than Tuesday night.
  5. Apollo Black
    Apollo Black avatar
    401 posts
    23 July 2016 in reply to Marcsa

    Hi Marcsa

    I'm not sure if I understand, was he admitted to hospital?

  6. Marcsa
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Marcsa avatar
    54 posts
    25 July 2016 in reply to Apollo Black

    Hi,

    No. I think maybe I should've taken him in. He made an appt with Uni counsellor who then had my son on the phone for an hour with Acute Care Team, who then made a time for him to see someone at Headspace. My son now is on medication again and hopefully will regularly ( at least for the time being ) see someone at Headspace. I am fearful that once again , my son may discontinue treatment once he feels the pressures of life are reduced.

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