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Forums / Relationship and family issues / Not sure what to do

Topic: Not sure what to do

5 posts, 0 answered
  1. Newbie78
    Newbie78 avatar
    5 posts
    28 September 2021
    For the last 6 months I have been in contact via sms and snapchat with an old friend. She normally only texts when she is drunk but never admits she is drunk when she is texting. She has also promised to organise a date to hang out. I am starting to think she is outright lying to me. She sends me random photos on snapchat of herself, just normal selfies and she got defensive when I took a screen shot of one. We are both lesbians. She is married and I am in a long term relationship. Should I cut ties?
    1 person found this helpful
  2. geoff
    Life Member
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    geoff avatar
    15065 posts
    28 September 2021 in reply to Newbie78

    Hello Newbie, and a warm welcome to the site.

    When someone texts you, when they are intoxicated, could mean 2 things, first she might be embarrassed and secondly, that's how she wants to communicate, but what she says means that she will not remember what she's done or said and only doing this when she has a chance to in her marriage.

    If you love someone you want to talk with them while you're sober and not drunk because is this how they actually feel, if they need alcohol to do this, then trouble may be heading your way.

    Best wishes.

    Geoff.

    1 person found this helpful
  3. romantic_thi3f
    Community Champion
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    romantic_thi3f avatar
    3050 posts
    28 September 2021 in reply to Newbie78

    Hi Newbie78,

    Welcome! Thank you for deciding to join us.

    Gosh I wish I had the answer for you, I really do. But only you know your life so I couldn't say 'do this' and 'do that'. Me giving you advice would be the worst advice because I don't know you :)

    What I can say though, is that I kind of think you know what you need to do. When she's married, you're in a long-term relationship, and the contact from her is through drunk texting.. Is there a part of you that wants to be in a relationship with her instead?

    What do you think are the pros and cons of both?

    rt

  4. Newbie78
    Newbie78 avatar
    5 posts
    28 September 2021 in reply to romantic_thi3f
    Thank you, it's nice to have input from a different perspective.
  5. Newbie78
    Newbie78 avatar
    5 posts
    28 September 2021 in reply to geoff
    Thank you for advice. Very valid points.

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