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Topic: All new to this

3 posts, 0 answered
  1. Stranger
    Stranger avatar
    2 posts
    24 October 2013

    Heyy People!

    When i was a kid my mum would always be "thats so gay... but nothing wrongs with that!!!" And then about 2 years ago, my sister came out! my sister and i are really close, shes like my best mate! But my mum has always been really weird about it! Then about 2 months ago mum turned to me and said "If your gay, dont come out. I dont need another one!" Then turns and says to my friends that she wants to be a civil celebrant and marry same sex couples... 1st WTF? conflicting stories much? and 2nd, i like chicks! i like dudes 2 but more attracted to chicks. and i have no idea how to well come out to her. and my dad, well he's a ministers son so that would go down sooo well!!

    To top it off. Everyone has always told me "You always copy your sister, when are you going to become your own person?" well HELLO i am my own person aren't i? I do my own shit, Infact shes the one who jumps in my ideas!!!

    BUt that doesn't really bother me. 

    I was always one of the boys, and i loved being one of the boys, soo much less Drama, then my mate always told me, "your a dyke in disguise" "wow your the gayest straight person eva" Sometimes i just wanna be like... And me being the stubborn mule i am i would always denie it. Full knowing that i was. and ive only just started telling my friends that hey im into girls. 


    But it just seems like there think im following the crowd, just trying to fit in. I dont fit in anywhere else why would i try and fit in, i this aspect? Why would i want to be called a lier? WHy would i risk losing my family! 


    I know this isnt like something huge in the eyes of other people, but this is ruling my life! and im over just thinking, Just forgrt about what other people say, Coz i cant do that!!!


    Any ways thats my rant over! 



  2. Chris B
    Community Manager
    • Works for beyondblue managing these forums. Not a mental health professional, but here to help. Email:
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Chris B avatar
    1757 posts
    28 October 2013 in reply to Stranger

    Hi Stranger,

    I’m sorry that you’ve had a poor reaction from your mum and friends.  There’s nothing more frustrating than hearing that old ‘gay is fashionable now’ line from people who have absolutely no idea what it’s like to actually live in these shoes and experience what we do.

    How do you get on with your sister?  It sounds like she could be a good source of support for you right now, given that she came out 2 years ago and will be further down the track of working through the coming out process.

    It doesn’t matter if it’s not huge in the eyes of others, it’s important to you.  And if it’s bugging you to the point where your life is being affected, then it’s massively important, so thanks for posting in here.

    Hope to hear from you again soon.

    Online Community Manager
  3. amamas
    blueVoices member
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    amamas avatar
    274 posts
    28 October 2013 in reply to Stranger

    Hey Stranger

    I'm so hearing you right now!  All peoples insane comments and thoughts about being gay infuriate me.  In my opinion being who you truly are is what's important,  and all of us need people around us to support us to be and find who that is sometimes.

    I'm straight but man I could write an entire book on my journey to get to that understanding of myself.  Why?  Because I listened too much to what other people said and thought and got well lost in the process.

    So I just want to say to you beautiful stranger whatever you are is totally AWESOME!  There are two very OLD songs that I find very inspiring when I'm confused and listening to others opinions too much. You may want to dive back in the archives of music and check them out.

    Life Uncommon by Jewel

    Probably by Fools Garden

    Take care

    cheers amamas

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