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Topic: Coming out

4 posts, 0 answered
  1. Haggisinoz
    Haggisinoz  avatar
    9 posts
    22 June 2020

    Morning,

    I hope everyone is well.

    As a proud gay man myself, I was interested to hear other people’s experience and concerns coming out or having already come out to your friends or family, regardless of your sexuality.

    For me personally I know it was one of the biggest challenges in my life, a decision that changed my life forever. Although challenging, I remember the day that I had the realisation that I was gay and that I didn’t have something else wrong with me and that I wasn’t alone. I was lucky because my friends were extremely supportive but unfortunately my family didn’t see it this way initially and it did take them several years for them to fully understand and to accept this.

    It’s such an individual and personal experience coming out to friends and family and one that is extremely daunting. For me personally I made sure I told my friends first so when I finally the had the courage tell my family, I knew my friends were here to support me either way.

    Interested to know what other people have experienced or what advice we can give to those of you who are considering coming out.

    stay safe :)

    1 person found this helpful
  2. Tay100
    Champion Alumni
    • Community champion volunteers who are not currently active on the forums.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Tay100 avatar
    647 posts
    23 June 2020 in reply to Haggisinoz

    Hi Haggisinoz,

    Cheers for posting, we really appreciate community-building posts like this! We are glad to hear that your coming out was a mostly positive and that you had a great network around you. And you are very correct; it can be a life-changing milestone (hopefully for the better!).

    Some great threads with similar themes about recovery, progression and success can be found here: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/long-term-support-over-the-journey and here https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well.

    Sending kindness- hope you get some great responses here!

    Tay100

    1 person found this helpful
  3. Rocky.P.
    Rocky.P. avatar
    5 posts
    25 June 2020 in reply to Haggisinoz

    Hey Haggisinoz,

    I share a somewhat similar story to you in that i told my friends first, and came out to my family a couple of years later. My friends were great... mostly... I did lose a couple of friends, but at the end of the day, were they really friends that I wanted in my life? Probably not!

    My mum and sister were accepting and things were fine there, my dad on the other hand wasn't so great, and it took quite a few years for him to be accepting, but we are great now, and he is fine with my fiancé as well. You are right, coming out it is a daunting experience and one that I unfortunately still find myself doing regularly in different situations. I think that's the most frustrating thing that people don't realise about being gay, having to constantly come out in different situations like work, or just meeting people, its draining sometimes... sometimes i can't even be bothered correcting people when they assume the gender of my partner!

    Thanks for the thread, hopefully more people add their thoughts!

    1 person found this helpful
  4. Haggisinoz
    Haggisinoz  avatar
    9 posts
    26 June 2020 in reply to Rocky.P.

    Hi Rocky P & Tay 100,

    Thanks for your reply, really appreciated.

    That's great to hear that your dad eventually came round and is now accepting of you and congratulations on your engagement. I married my partner last year and I still struggle with the question....what does your wife do lol. Always am awkward moment but more so for them because I don't sometimes like to embarrass people by correcting them but I do most of the time.

    Have a great weekend, enjoy (;

    1 person found this helpful

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