I completely see where you're coming from. I'm a bisexual, cisgender female, so I tend to seek out discussions about gender and sexuality online to better educate myself on the community of which I am a part of. And as a female gamer as well, I've also noticed that there is a lot of stigma surrounding women who game rather than men who game.
To me, I've come to learn that gender is socially constructed. If you look around the world, different cultures have and have always had different perceptions of gender. Let's focus on gender fluidity and androgyny for a moment. These are definitely not new concepts, they've been seen for thousands of years in many different forms, such as in Greek and Norse mythology. While skirts and dresses may be geared towards women in many western cultures, the Scottish kilt is a great example of how these may be socially acceptable for men. In Ancient Egypt, men would wear black pigment as eyeliner, green malachite as eye shadow, and use red ochre as lip and cheek stains; these were all symbols of masculinity, as they were thought to ward off illnesses and exude wealth and class. In Ancient Rome, men would also use powder, red pigment for their cheeks, and even an early version of modern-day "nail polish", made from pig fat and blood.
As you can see, ideals of masculinity and femininity are very much socially constructed, and based on societal norms in a historical context.
It's not unnatural to identify as female but dislike stereotypically "female" activities, like makeup and doing hair. To be honest, labels like "female" and "male" are just that - labels. While in a biological sense, if your sex is female or male it may predispose you to different medical conditions or illnesses, your gender expression is something that should be unique to you. So long as you're comfortable with how you identify, it doesn't matter what prejudiced gamer boys online will tell you. Unfortunately, some people will forever be ignorant and not accepting towards people who are simply trying to exist as their most authentic self. As a bisexual woman, I've experienced this a lot.
If you choose to identify as male or enby, go for it. Experiment with labels. Maybe get some of your closest and trusted friends or family to try out different pronouns for you and see which ones feel the most natural. You can also try and join online groups and find other people with experiences similar to yours. Facebook's a great place to start for this.