dear Jo, it sounds as though it's all full on, and it's all too much at the moment.
you meet someone at first, and I'm talking about same sex or heterosexual, it
doesn't matter how much you love them, but if they have had a terrible
past you will be drawn into their concerns, and you will try and help them, but then your own problems are pushed aside, and they do build up, not being able to be released, until one day it all explodes.
Everybody has problems, but it's us the depressed who can't cope with them, nor can we cope with others who seem to use us as a battering ram, but we aren't mentally capable for this.
I don't believe that you are ready for this new girlfriend, and to now 'look after somebody else's emotional well being', isn't what you you need right now. So basically I agree with you, but you will have to stall her from coming over to probably live with you, and however the way you do it will create annoyance by her, but it will get you off the hook.
So you have to tell her that there is too much for you to cope with at the moment, like the divorce and getting what is due to you, then your sons are really upset at the moment, so you want to spend time with them, plus you have your studies to deal with, so therefore I want to be by myself for awhile. I'm sorry but maybe we can pick up some time later.
You are putting so much pressure on yourself by seeing this 23 yr old chap, who is a drug addict, he only wants to see you because he certainly wants money to buy drugs, you are nothing more than a cash cow for him, emotionally you may not even register with him, and if you give him money now, then wait until he's released, he will be at your door stop everyday.
I think it would be wise to avoid him in every aspect now, and I wouldn't go to jail at all. He will only lie to you in everyway possible, telling you so many things that never eventuate or have never happened.
Close the monoply board so that you don't have to go to jail.
I would consider having the 10 free appointments with a psychologist, and I personally mention them rather than psychiatrist's, only because they are much more relaxed and personal, so this makes you feel more at ease. I have had both and psychologists take my pick.
There has been a lot of unfortunate events that have happened, so take a deep breathe and try to get on with YOUR life, this is the most important criteria of all. L Geoff. x