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Forums / Staying well / Can we share our strategies to cope with Christmas and the New Years?

Topic: Can we share our strategies to cope with Christmas and the New Years?

14 posts, 0 answered
  1. romantic_thi3f
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    romantic_thi3f avatar
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    14 December 2021

    Hello!

    I have been thinking about this a lot lately and I know I'm not alone in it, but Christmas isn't the 'greatest time of the year' for me. I tend to struggle a bit because all the tv ads make me feel like I should be really happy and making a giant roast for my adorable and loving family and that's just not the case at all :(

    So I thought, if maybe Christmas isn't great for others either, maybe you can share ways that you get through it?

    One of the things that I've been doing is a lot of journalling and gaming to distract me, and I've also made up a few code words so that when I'm away I can try and sneak out for 5 minutes. I also bought myself a Christmas present as well (Majorly into jigsaws lately) which feels really nice.

    Looking forward to seeing all of your ideas.

    rt

    1 person found this helpful
  2. mmMekitty
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    14 December 2021 in reply to romantic_thi3f

    Hi rt,

    Ooo I hate those ads, too, that seem to be trying to say we aren't doing Xmas right if we're not spending lots of money, putting up tonnes of crap all over our homes, & outside them as well, & making food enough to feed whole regiments, ALL for greater profit of the companies selling it.

    I used to put up a few things, watch really crappy Xmas tele, & try to recipricate if someone gave me something, - but I don't have heaps of money & will not go into debt to have a big Xmas, don't enjoy feasting until I feel sick & unable to move, & really don't like cleaning up after.

    Now I do a few things for myself, since being estranged from family. But, I don't know about this year, because I am not sure if I can plan for anything. My sis & I are talking some, 'business' stuff, & not much else, so I don't expect her to reach out this year either.

    I have for some years, bought myself a prezzie, made my own Xmas dinner, or (sometimes, but not this year), gone to Xmas lunches put on by various organisations. I belong to a couple still, but they are not doing Xmas lunch/party this year again. Nor is the other, I think, which is a community lunch put on by a religious organisation, & was really good whenI did get to that a couple times.

    I went up the road a couple weeks ago, for the Xmas thing the local pollie puts on each year, (but not when it's raining, or last year..)

    I'm rather stuck now. Because I can't see enough, Xmas crap on tele is not much good, so I like to borrow a couple Xmas themed audiobooks , & listen to my own 'Hogfather' by Terry Pratchett audiobook, like a tradition for me, & music I find, too, & this year, I want to be around BB as much as I am able. I thought I might be around a lot, but I'm not sure now.

    I made my own thread, but people don't seem much interested in my idea. Oh, well, I'll get over it.

    I'm glad to contribute to your thread, anyway.😺

    I keep thinking, so long as people are concerned about COVID-19 & social distancing, something in a park would be ideal. The little park up the road from me was fine for the number, which didn't seem as many as I imagined would be there, given how it wasn't held last year, like so many other community events, so, when finally there is I think there'd be many more people coming along. So I managed to not bump around like a ball in a pin ball machine!

    Great to see kids having fun, laughing & such. If I'd stayed I'd've heard singing.

    I only came for the yummy sausage sizzle!

    mmMekitty

  3. HappyHelper88
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    14 December 2021 in reply to romantic_thi3f

    Hello! Thanks for sharing
    Christmas isnt the best for me either used to be a big family catch up but there has been so much conflict in last few years and its gone from the whole big family to just a selective few the past few years
    we just make the most of the day and just eat a lot of good food, we cook enough food for double and lots of desserts
    I always buy myself a Christmas present and just spend the Christmas break relaxing and focusing on myself

    Looking forward to seeing all of your ideas.

  4. romantic_thi3f
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    romantic_thi3f avatar
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    15 December 2021 in reply to mmMekitty

    Hi mmMekitty,

    Thank you for jumping in to this thread and the other one about Christmas pressies. I really appreciate it and it's times like these I wish we didn't have a word count limit because I know I could talk to you all day! :)

    Such a bummer about these other organisations not doing Christmas things; I guess with covid it's all gone quiet? Are there people that you like to catch up with or anything going virtual?

    I hope it's okay to ask (and no pressure to answer of course), but when you said you can't see enough, how does that change with BB vs on tv? Do you have any recommendations for Christmas themed audiobooks? I did watch the Good Omens series which I believe was based on his books and loved it but haven't read or listened to anything else.

    I'm rambling! Sorry- what's your thread and I'll reply to yours too :)

    rt

  5. mmMekitty
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    15 December 2021 in reply to romantic_thi3f

    Hi rt,

    Unless a show has a very simple appearance, I need audio description to know what’s going on, what characters are doing, unless another remarks on the activity. I am limited to the SBS & ABC programmes that have AD included .
    *
    I have liked the silliness of 'Spicks & Specks - A Very Specky Christmas', but a lot of that is visual humour. No audio description, but sometimes, I think the humour would be lost if it was described anyway.

    I enjoy various versions of Charles Dickens' 'A Christmas Carol', my favourite is the 'Muppets Christmas Carol'

    There was a beautiful movie cartoon, 'The Snowman', set entirely to music, & audio description would trample all over the music,, so that one will have to be a memory.

    I can't recall the name of a movie, about two kids who are kidnapped by Martians, who don't have Xmas or Santa, & their kids are miserable, so the Earth kids are supposed to be able to make things right, & bright, & do so by introducing Santa into the Martians' lives, & believing, Santa indeed does arrive! Something like that -must be 10 years since I last saw that!

    It was so silly, I just had to laugh while groaning.

    That's the sort of thing I like best. Those that I think are so bad, but somehow, although they make me feel sick, embarrassed for the creators, yet I can't look away, & find myself laughing, mostly at myself for enjoying the crap. A lot of sit-coms have made stuff like that. It's always over the top & gives out a sense that if xmas (especially with family) was not chaotic & fraught with conflict & misunderstanding, which, somehow, gets sorted out & everybody loves everybody again, then it's not really Xmas!
    I wonder if I am a sentimental cynic. The whole way modern Xmas is presented to us makes me feel I am from another planet myself, but I find myself drawn to it, even while my cynical heart quakes.
    We used to see heaps of this stuff, every year, the same stuff, but somewhen, I don't know, but now I'm not finding much of this Xmas crap at all on tele anymore.

    You remind me, I did find a few books on Vision Australia's library; must find them again. One was actually pretty nice, as I recall. They did have Dr Suess's original story about the Grinch who Stole Christmas.

    Google:
    Say Yes to Christmas - This American Life, (radio show)
    I’m sure you will find more on YouTube
    *
    My 🎄 thread is called:
    End of 2021, Holiday, Humbug, or what?
    See you there? ‘Cause I am going to be around!😺

    mmMekitty

  6. Ggrand
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    15 December 2021 in reply to romantic_thi3f

    Hello Dear rm and everyone....🤗..

    I don’t like Christmas..I love what it stands for..and the caring, sharing, peace, compassion, kindness etc...that the media is so focused on for that one day as well as happy laughter of family and friends eating a smorgasbord board of expensive foods..and then theirs the gift giving...How much has that changed...Gifts are supposed to be given from our heart...now they are given..only to expect as a way to relieve a gift back....if you don’t supply a gift for the one given to you...You are classified as stingy, not a friend anymore and a mean person....

    I spend Christmas with my 2 fur babies....watching them having fun destroying the wrapping paper and like any small child...plays more with the wrapping paper instead of the gift....😂...getting it all over the lounge room...it gives me a giggle each year...

    My children ring me...Which I love and its my highlight of the day, talking to them, watching little vids they send me of my grandchildren opening their presents....

    I mostly make me a yummy fruit salad with the more expensive fruits I only buy for Christmas Day...It’s a lovely treat I look forward to...eating it while I watch some classic Christmas movies then listen to some Christmas songs while I’m sitting outside...

    If I’m up to it, again this year....I will drive my car to a place on the way to town, where the road goes over the top of a mountain..park it their and watch the sun setting over the mountains with my 2 fur girls...

    Then it’s home, if my neighbour asks me over for a coffee...which she usually does...I will go over with some fruit salad and Christmas cake, my fur girls and we just sit, chat and relax while watching her 2 fur babies and my 2 fur girls play with each other....

    Not much of any strategies...

    I hope everyone can relax and enjoy Christmas Day the best they can... Its the one day of the year that can cause us to have a huge impact on our mental health....A day to do what you want to do....and not what everyone else is doing or expecting you to do...

    My kindest thoughts to everyone with some pre Christmas hugs 🤗 and peaceful wishes 🕊..

    Grandy...

  7. mmMekitty
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    15 December 2021 in reply to Ggrand

    Hey Grandy, I love the thought of your fur babies ripping open their prezzies & playing with the paper!😺

    Having a peaceful day sounds good to me.😸

    💖💖💖to yo & your fur babies.

    mmMekitty

  8. Guest_1643
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    15 December 2021 in reply to mmMekitty

    Hi all,

    I dread new years eve.

    Sometimes I've booked holidays on ny day so I can also just avoid the time.

    I don't have any friends or family to celebrate with.

  9. Ggrand
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    15 December 2021 in reply to Guest_1643

    Hello everyone...

    Sleepy...I also dread New Year’s Eve...We have a small pub in town and they get really loud...I try my best to get to sleep before the noise starts...Wake up as normal to a new day...New year doesn’t mean that my life will suddenly change just because it’s a different year date...It’s in reality it’s just another day...

    Grandy...

  10. Doolhof
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    16 December 2021 in reply to romantic_thi3f

    Hi rt and All,

    For those of you who like Christmas, and even to those of you who struggle, I wish you all a special day on December 25th no matter what you do. May you be kind and caring to yourselves.

    Christmas for me this year has been a bit of a non event leading up to it. Work Christmas parties cancelled due to working with vulnerable people and being asked to not attend social gatherings.

    Had to cancel attending 3events. We are able to attend small family gatherings so will be doing that Christmas Eve.

    Christmas Day I am working, if last year is to be repeated I will be extremely busy, yelled at, abused for keeping people waiting and totally stressed out by the end of the day. Only to have to repeat all of that on Sunday.

    My in-laws know I am working Christmas Day so have planned a Christmas Day lunch so I can not attend.

    So how am I going to cope? I have no idea how I am going to cope Christmas Day at work! Some deep breathing might help amidst the chaos.

    I like the idea of buying myself a gift, not sure what that might be though.

    A bubble bath with music playing Christmas Day when I get home from work. A walk. Something to eat. A Christmas movie of some kind.

  11. mmMekitty
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    17 December 2021 in reply to Doolhof

    Because Xmas & New Year too for that matter, we could include the Ekka holiday, Queens' Birthday, & Labor Day too, dont' mean the thiings they were dsigned to mean for me, I decided to make of these days what I will.

    Used to be days when you'd plan ahead for when the shops closed. They don't do tha much at all anymore, but I still tend to plan ahead, especially around this latter half of December to the first half of January. I don't like huge shopping crowds.

    The food I want to indulge in is food (using that term lightly) I ought not eat at any time, but once a year, I enjoy some of these things.

    I think I am drawn to tradition,& am sort of creating my own Xmas/New Year Week tradition. I have a loose list of things I do for one week. Certain books, music, tele, decorations, (mmm maybe - it's a hard one when once they are out they fade from my sight as soon as I step a couple paces away, so why, I ask), food , of-course, & I'd like to incorporate a place or type of place to go. & there are a couple pieces of clothing, & like stickers on things, I rather like the little emojis. Not enough really, & a few aren't so good, I reckon, but Xmas is brimming with crap so that's okay!

    mmMekitty

  12. geoff
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    17 December 2021 in reply to romantic_thi3f

    Hello Rt, I don't like this time of the year and haven't gone to any sibling Xmas parties for years, all the questions I'm asked is just too much, so I never go and would be happy just to be by myself, except that my sons visit me, one who lives close by and cooks me a roast, and my other son and his two young daughters I see boxing day or after.

    I pretend to my granddaughters because it's their time, but since Mum passed away there is no joy at this time of the year and all my family know, as my grandmother used to say 'the sooner it comes the sooner it's gone'.

    I am sorry this has happened.

    Geoff.

  13. blondguy
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    17 December 2021 in reply to romantic_thi3f

    Hey Hey RT :-)

    Always a bonus to read your input and excellent thread!

    I feel your frustration with Christmas as it can be a difficult time of year for so many (me included!)

    For children its a wonderful magical time. I just noticed that Geoff spoke from the heart above and also appears somewhat sad about Christmas yet he should be over the moon as he has a son that can prepare a roast so Christmas does have some meaning to him which is great

    I havent had a roast since the early 1980's...I wish! I guess some folk dont appreciate how lucky they are

    Christmas is a special time for children/kids....they deserve it

    Merry Christmas romantic_thi3f and thankyou so much for the guidance you have provided to so many...

    my kindest always

    Paul

    1 person found this helpful
  14. mmMekitty
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    17 December 2021 in reply to blondguy

    The little kid inside me is clamouring to keep that sparkly, singing, happy, magical, illusion as we adults know, all alive! For those of us who had rough childhoods, now we can give ourselves something we missed out on, but as I'v been trying to say, we need to actively inviting the child's idea of Xmas to awaken & just take over for a bit. You know, whatever you feel you lack or are missing at this time, you can create it for yourself.

    I don't want to rely on someone else to bring Xmas to me. Sure, it was nice when one of my helpers had asked me to lunch with her & her family & friends, wonderful, in fact, but I know I cannot take it for granted that anyone I know will do that every year.So,in any event, I plan for myself. This year, because so many events I might have gone to are not happening, I'm definitely planning for myself, you know, while waiting for the New Year, & having some serious treatment, I am going to make sure I have some fun.

    It turns out, my sis is likely to be elsewhere, if she can possibly be. Her son is in Perth, so that's what she wants to do.

    Someone I know has sent me an email,& quite unexpectedly, he has wished me a happy Xmas. He has flattly refused before, no gifts, no party, no nothing, because his past was so terrible. So rather than have a major crisis every year (& for his birthday too(, he chose to avoid & deny himself the possibility that now wouldn't be a repeat of his childhood experiences. So, getting his email was wonderful. I hope this is a turning point for him.

    mmMekitty

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