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Forums / Staying well / This bipolar life

Topic: This bipolar life

  1. Lady_Stardust
    Lady_Stardust avatar
    127 posts
    1 February 2017

    Afternoon, all! How are things?

    Dottie it did help, and the home seems calm for now. Hoping it remains that way. And music really brings people together, doesn't it?​

    velvetfaerie ​adulting is very hard sometimes, it's can be such an effort. Good luck with everything! Take it slow, one thing at a time, and I'm sure adulting won't seem so bad once you get back into the swing of things. (:

    As for me, I heard back from one of the jobs I applied for and unfortunately didn't progress to the shortlist. I didn't really expect to and I know I shouldn't take it too hard, but it's difficult not to when it comes to rejection. I know my résumé isn't very impressive, but I'm hoping someone is going to take a chance on me. I've been searching for what feels like forever.

    1 person found this helpful
  2. Guest_322
    Guest_322 avatar
    1660 posts
    1 February 2017 in reply to Lady_Stardust

    Hi everyone,

    Lady Stardust, I'm glad home is sounding more peaceful at the moment.

    That must have been disappointing and disheartening. Rejections almost always sucks. I mean, even if it's not personal, it still sucks.

    Random brainwave (I'm full of them): have you considered a slightly more radical approach in your job hunt. What about cold calling?

    I mean, that's not easy to do but I know people who have landed awesome jobs mostly because the companies were so impressed by their go-getter attitude. Just a thought- you don't have to do it of course.

    And agreed about music! It's the universal language that transcends all spoken languages like I don't need to speak French or Japanese, for example, to enjoy a French or Japanese song.

    I'm not up to too much today. Day off work. Bad thing is less money. Good thing is it gives me more time to run errands (I'm currently putting off ha, ha).

    Dottie x

  3. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3698 posts
    1 February 2017 in reply to Lady_Stardust

    Slow and one thing at a time is something I need to constantly remind myself of.

    Ask my BF. :)

    Just got to work. Mountains of science/labby/veterinary things to see to.

  4. Airies
    Airies avatar
    1065 posts
    1 February 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hello folks,

    how we doing? What a wonderful gang we have here. A diverse range of ages and backgrounds and we are abuzz. as a kid I used to run around with a bug catcher, plastic thingy for catching insects and mucked around with a microscope as well. Dorky kid who was alergic to bees and stung every year. My study days are behind me but DBT will be enough for my wee brain. Such a clever dick today , cleaning my row machine, pulled and tried to secure handle behind a chair end result handle flying through the air and end result busted screen:( ...won't be doing that again needless to say an expensive excecise.

    Visitd my psych today, heart to heart discussion about reducing Some of my meds...staying on ADs for good and gradual reduction of some of the others.. Rapt with the progress I've made and she believes some of the meds are making the real issues.i actually ran out of my PRNs last night, survived ok, hence the discussion.Early days but progress.

    Kazz before you know it you will be part of the furniture. It's only natural to be a tad apprehensive in any new situation yet alone a new work environment.

    Chae keep on chipping away, something will come up. Rejection in any form is a bummer and I know that I tend to take any form of rejection harder then most. It's part of my makeup but one of the msny things I'm trying to change.

    i need to sleep. Take a few happy pills,

    cheers hugs Len

  5. Kazzl
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    1873 posts
    1 February 2017 in reply to Airies

    Hiya Len - thanks mate. Wonder what piece of furniture I should be ... think I'll be a tall and elegant bookcase. That works for me. 👍

    Hope you sleep well my friend.

    Cheers

    Kaz

  6. Kazzl
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    1873 posts
    2 February 2017 in reply to Kazzl

    Morning all xx

    I start school today!! Orientation session for the MH Cert 4 course this afternoon. I'm so excited, like a little kid haha.

    There's a very good chance I'll be the oldest in the class by a long shot but I don't care. It's possible too that a friend from my bipolar support group will be there. I know she was planning to enrol. I hope so, then I'll have a little friend to play with at recess.

    This is a big deal - I haven't set foot inside a classroom or lecture theatre for more than 30 years. Most importantly, what should I wear!!! 😄

    Hope everyone has a good day, and thanks again for all your support and good wishes with my change of direction. I start work next Monday, so I'll probably be a mess of nerves then too.

    Cheers

    Kaz

    xx

  7. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3698 posts
    2 February 2017 in reply to Kazzl

    I hope today is splendid !!!

    I think you will have so much fun. I am being back at school. I love the youngsters and I love helping them.

    Off subject - My relationship is a shambles. Where should I post about this? Who can help?

    Can't stop crying. I wish he and his ex would sort their SHIT out.

    Chae.

  8. MallowPuff
    MallowPuff avatar
    67 posts
    2 February 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Good luck today Miss Kazzl! Hope it all goes well :)

    Turned up to a running event last night, did a lovely 8km around Melbourne Zoo with some friends, was good to be up and about amongst my running buddies. I've shared my struggles with a couple of them, so they look after me which is great. This morning was a well overdue dentist trip.... been getting my Sh...it together, booking in all the right dr appointments and with a now drier than usual mouth (thanks meds) I was fearing all my teeth were about to fall out.... thankfully not the case. I've been blessed with some pretty hardy teeth. Made it to 40 with no fillings, just a couple of deep grooves filled.

    Oh and at the run they had a beyond blue stand...went over and said thanks, grabbed a lovely blue wrist band, and got all weirdly emotional for a moment. Felt like bursting into tears and hugging the people there, calling out "I love you guys!".....

    Len, good news on the meds front, good luck with cutting back (under supervision). Re the rowing machine, damn! Now that sucks... these annoying occurrences that come to test us... hope it still works fine though!

    Overall still kinda flat.... quite a change to the hypo/mixed mallow..... thankfully it's a calm flat, a much slower mode.... a strange melancholy.... with moments of goodness and hope... hard work, but progressing.

    And ive parked reading Unquiet Mind... was wonderfully informative, but hard reading. Quite raw in places...certainly not the humurous read of Wishful Drinking...

    "spend your life doing strange things, with weird people"

    I love my weird people :) keep it strange okay!

    1 person found this helpful
  9. Kazzl
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    1873 posts
    2 February 2017 in reply to MallowPuff

    I'm tickled pink to be one of your weird people Mallow! Well done on the run too mate! Fantastic - and I know the BB people would have been pleased you stopped by.

    Chae - I replied on your other post hun. It's best with something specific like that to start a thread, like you did, because it will be more visible. BUT, feel free to post about anything here. This thread is just a place for us to gather - we can share and seek support about anything. Anyways, I'll repeat what I said - you deserve better and are worth so much more IMHO.

    Hi to everyone, I'm a bit tired so won't stay, just wanted to check in. School was good and my friend was there, so I had someone to sit next to. This class is just for the scholarship holders, ie people with lived experience, so I'm looking forward to getting to know the others. I couldn't have an afternoon nap like I'm used to though. ☹️ Early night.

    Cheers everyone

    Kaz

    xxx

  10. Guest_322
    Guest_322 avatar
    1660 posts
    2 February 2017 in reply to Kazzl

    Hi everyone,

    Chae, things sound extremely stressful with your BF. It really sucks when partners bring baggage and issues from a previous relationship into a relationship.

    Len, props to you for your progress! I hope you're proud of yourself. It sounds like your most recent session/conversation with your psych went well.

    Shame about the shattered screen. I hope it doesn't eat too much into your budget. Either way, accidents are a pain.

    Kaz, I'm happy that class went well and that you had company too 😊 I hope you forge some meaningful friendships with your classmates.

    Yeah, it must have been hard going sans afternoon nap. Maybe when you get into the swing of your new schedule, your body will adapt and you'll feel less tired.

    Mallow, congratulations on completing an 8km run! That's pretty impressive!

    Your running buddies sound like rad people who have your back. Your anecdote about feeling emotional at the BB stand made me smile. Hey, can I be one of your weird people too?

    Your "strange melancholy" sounds like a dull ache as opposed to acute pain. Nevertheless, pain is pain. I know sad- extremely familiar with sad. Have never personally known mania or hypomania but sadness? That, I know.

    Ivan, Lady Stardust, Tony WK and anyone else reading, I hope you're all doing alright (or alright-ish if you're struggling).

    Dottie x

  11. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3698 posts
    3 February 2017 in reply to Guest_322

    Hey Dottie!!

    All will be ok regardless what happens today. Hard word time!!

    My colleagues at work yesterday were the best. I wish I could share them with you all. I spent three hours in tears and they all helped me feel better.

    (I can't figure out how to put your names in bold lol. Need my morning coffee I think).

    Mallow -8km run!!? NIIICCEEE. Ah the aerobic rush. :) and such an accomplishment!

    Kazzl- glad class went well!! Hope you got a good rest also. I find school sedating lol.

    ***Hugs to all***

    urghh I woke up at 4am... can't sleep.... and I have a long day of work and TAFE today.....

    happy Friday everyone!!!

    Chae

    x

  12. Lady_Stardust
    Lady_Stardust avatar
    127 posts
    3 February 2017

    Morning, all! How is everyone?

    Sounds like a lot of achievements going on! I'm proud of everyone. (:

    I had a bad day yesterday, hence why I wasn't around. I was feeling very bad and my appointment with a employment caseworker didn't go particularly well. My regular caseworker wasn't there, so I had to see a stranger. I didn't like that, since I had already built a relationship with my regular caseworker and didn't want to have to go through all the details again. I was pretty teary already, but that certainly didn't help. On top of that, I was offended by her question of whether I actually wanted to work when we were going through what I would and would prefer not to do.

    Even if I wasn't feeling fragile, that would have offended me. I thought it rude, because I've been trying really hard with my attempts at finding employment and of course I actually want to work, otherwise why would I be there? I'm a voluntary client at the organisation, I have no financial obligation to be there (as in, I'm not on Centrelink support) so obviously I want to work. Urgh. Made a bad mood worse. :/

  13. velvetfaerie
    velvetfaerie avatar
    3698 posts
    3 February 2017 in reply to Lady_Stardust

    **hugs** Lady.

    Some people have no tact or self awareness. Hell, at times I am like that :/ I do hope you are feeling better today.

    I want to make you all laugh. I am 1.5 hours late to work today because my friends goats escaped. This threw things a lot because we car pool. Buggers! They had a great time eating grape vines, shrubs, washing, etc. My friend was NOT impressed. She is still not at work. :)

    1 person found this helpful
  14. MallowPuff
    MallowPuff avatar
    67 posts
    3 February 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

    Hehehehe, finally got their goat huh... brilliant... :) *chuckle*

    Lady , you really do wonder how some people came to work in their roles, or how they even keep their jobs, and/or their need to feel superior by lowering others, particularly in a client facing role! I usually flip it around and wonder what made their life so sad and what troubles they have that shaped them into such a bitter or insensitive person.

    Dottie yup, it's a dull persistent ache that is underlying. It's not always present, when I'm busy or distracted, but when I stop, it's like I sink. It's like the hamster on the wheel has gone, cobwebs and tumbleweeds float through, and it's no longer a buzzing head, but a heavy heart. Probably mostly realisation of the altered state I was in for the last 12 or more months, the damage I caused, how much things got out of control, how far I fell, and the whole re-calibration of expectations, thoughts, feelings, hopes and dreams. It's a strange process, but I'm grateful for strangely being a basically optimistic type of person, thankfully that trait hasn't left me. It just has to work a lot harder at the moment. ​

    And you are all in my newly formed bunch of weird. Welcome aboard the good ship lollipop!

    Some day I'm going to fly.
    I'll be a pilot too.
    And when I do, how would you
    Like to be my crew...

    On the good ship lollipop.
    Its a sweet trip to a candy shop
    Where bon-bons play
    On the sunny beach of Peppermint Bay.

    Have a good Friday all... time to make an appointment with my shrink (psychologist), to catch her up on the past 3 months :)

    Cheers!

  15. MallowPuff
    MallowPuff avatar
    67 posts
    3 February 2017 in reply to MallowPuff

    *Mania and hypomania

    When superheroes lose control of their powers

    ----

    *Kryptonite

    smallest effective dose required to keep superpowers in check

  16. Airies
    Airies avatar
    1065 posts
    3 February 2017 in reply to MallowPuff

    Hi Mallow

    8 k run around the zoo, sounds idyllic and there's some lovelly parkland there. A very green vibrant part of the city. No excercise for me today funeral and my mums birthday she passed away 5 years ago.Payed respects and grateful to see a few old family friends.

    Velvetfaery that's a great excuse for being late for work. No mean feat in capturing a goat in full flight , scary things

    Lady_Stardust ​proud of you as well. Some people have no tact or consideration in regards to how cutting their remarks can be. I'm slowly regaining a thick skin or trying too on any day some remarks cut deep. A cyber hug from a fellow sufferer and hope your mood gets better I'm sure it will.

    My first job was in TAFE , Fond memories and TAFE like many industries was in full flight in the 1980,s one could say in the good old days.

    Dottie it's only money, one comes into the world with nothing and leaves the world with nothing that's something I heard today.The tech rang and the screen sounds promptly stuffed so a newer upgrade will have a few more bells and wistles, like Hearth rate, Bluetooth.As much as I m trying to simplify my life I do love a new gadget, I also need to cut back on purchases I think it's a bipolar thing, impulsiveness one never knows what one will do.

    i too am extremelly familiar with sad., been very sad , sad at the Wong times, politically incorrect at other times.. Someone today described me as always being happy.. I open ed up about the last year, no shame in opening up about being biplolar and hues to show how we can ,mask things. You come across as a happy, very giving soul via the written word and hope th is brings a smile to your dial.its great that you are here !! we are weird in a wonderful way.

    it would be rather dull without us wouldn't it?

    Kazz big steps and well done. That's fantastic news, sounds like you are recharging the batteries . I must profess to having many an afternoon nap even long periods of being bed bound when I was really struggling. I need my sleep, I tend to zone out a bit with the meds but have noticed that with ceasing/cutting back on the meds the last few days I'm a bit more hyper in a good way and waking up before 8am and alert.Not looking forward to Winter, suffer the Winter blues big time, hopefully by then learning more and more techniques and coping better.one thing I can be assured of is of many friends here.As a learned scholar once said I hope you are all doing alright or alrightish if struggling

    xo​

    1. Airies
      Airies avatar
      1065 posts
      3 February 2017 in reply to MallowPuff

      Hi Kazz,

      Totally agree on a tall and elegant bookcase ,

      maybe Victorian Ash, cedar or Maple.Lets see certainly well read and going back to my Library days 150 Psychology, 641.994 you'd find something on Australian Cooking, 700s are the Arts , Literature in the 800s and a bit of Aussi History around the 994. Nothing like a good read is there.

      Hopfully as I continue to improve, I will have another fortitude to pick up a good book and read it from cover to cover,

      Any ideas?

      cheers Len xix

    2. Lady_Stardust
      Lady_Stardust avatar
      127 posts
      5 February 2017

      Dottie forgot to reply to you! My memory is terrible. Cold calling is a good idea, I could try that out. I hate making phone calls, but honestly I have to try and get past that anxiety. I tend to fade out a little bit on phone calls, but I'm working on that, too. (:

      Hugs to everybody, thank you for your kind words! <3 I'm thinking I may make a complaint to my regular caseworker; I'm not usually one to do so (complaining to mates is my thing) but this time I think I should say something. Next time I see him. And velvetfaerie, that did make me smile! What naughty goats, hahaha.

      How is everyone going?

      1 person found this helpful
    3. Guest_322
      Guest_322 avatar
      1660 posts
      5 February 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

      Hi everyone,

      Chae, thanks for the hug! Here's another virtual hug in return 😊 Your colleagues sound amazingly supportive. I'm glad they were there for you.

      I enjoyed the goats anecdote ha, ha. Well, I bet the goats had a blast even if your friend probably didn't feel the same way about their escape.

      Lady Stardust, I agree with everyone else's comments about how some people are in the wrong jobs,and have the sensitivity and insight of a brick wall (obviously I'm referring to your awful employment caseworker).

      As you said, you clearly wanted/want to work. You attended the meeting of your own volition yet she had the nerve to make a snide remark about your willingness to work. Pfft! Says everything about her and nothing about you.

      No worries at all. I'm sure you're just being nice and your memory is perfectly okay 😊 Cold calling is pretty tough but can sometimes do the trick. No pressure though as it was only an idea, and it's 100% up to you to choose what you do and don't do. We will support you either way.

      Mallow, the past 12 months must have been very overwhelming. You sound emotionally wiped- looks like the enormity of the past 12 months has finally hit home.

      With emotions and with pain, what's that saying about how "you can run but you can't hide?" I admit that it's a tad hypocritical coming from me but that doesn't make that statement less true. Life huh?

      On a lighter note, I'm honoured to join your merry band of Weird (capital W). Boarding the lollipop ship as I type (first class please ticket please).

      Len, I'm glad your screen is being sorted. Nothing wrong with gadgets as I feel many people have their interests and favourite things to buy. Kaz (hi Kaz!) likes her plants and gardening related buys and my dad loved gadgets too! As for me, I've a bit of a soft spot for art (mostly can't afford it on my student budget though), fashion and skincare.

      Public face and private pain is something that I personally love to say. It looks as though you can relate to those words too.

      Kudos to you on your openness about living with bipolar as well as your other struggles to that person. Appearances can be deceiving and it's hard to always know how much is hidden behind a person's smile and "cheerful" demeanour.

      I guess my writing depends on my mood, the thread, the conversation at hand, etc. I generally write with humour but I have a serious side too.

      Thank you, and yes, life would be dull without us ha, ha.

      Dottie x

      2 people found this helpful
    4. Guest_322
      Guest_322 avatar
      1660 posts
      5 February 2017 in reply to Lady_Stardust

      Hi again,

      Exceeded word count so had to create a new post ha, ha.

      Kaz, I hope you're having many, many afternoon naps this weekend to make up for your busy week.

      Ivan, Tony WK, Resilience plus everyone else- warm Sunday wishes to all of you.

      Everyone, I've had a decent weekend. I had a day to myself yesterday sans friends and away from my housemates.

      Did my own thing and checked out some musicians busking on the streets, visited a market and picked up some awesome secondhand fashion and looked at buildings (the last one might sound strange but I have a weird fascination with architecture and design).

      Dottie x

    5. Ivan0491
      Ivan0491 avatar
      13 posts
      5 February 2017 in reply to Kazzl

      Hi All

      What is it like going back to school Kaz?.

      8k run around Melbourne zoo sounds epic, well done Mallow.

      This week has been a struggle just can't seem to crawl out of the dark pit I find myself in.

      Anyways hope you are all having a great weekend

      Regards

      Ivan

      1 person found this helpful
    6. Kazzl
      Champion Alumni
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      Kazzl avatar
      1873 posts
      6 February 2017 in reply to Ivan0491

      Hi everyone! Just a quick post - I have to get ready for work!! 😄

      Hi Ivan - gaahh, sorry you're in a pit mate. We all know what that feels like - crap. Keep looking up, you'll find the ladder in time. Meanwhile, we're here, sitting with you. Has anything in particular sent you down, or do you think it's one of those truly crap mood swings that happen for no apparent reason?

      Hiya Dottie hun - sadly yesterday's afternoon nap gave way to four hours of ironing, my least favourite thing to do. But at least I'm organised. Anxious as hell, but I'll look good haha.

      Gotta go - love to all, I hope you have a good day and a cool breeze blows through your hair.

      Cheers

      Kaz

      xx

      1 person found this helpful
    7. velvetfaerie
      velvetfaerie avatar
      3698 posts
      6 February 2017 in reply to Kazzl

      Have a great day everyone. :)

      Thank you for all my virtual hugs and kind helpful words.

      I am not coping this am. No apparent reason. My uterus has been playing up bad this cycle as well. Am i alone with this regarding stress, (physical and emotional).... and being bipolar?

      Seeing Dr today. Scared as.

      Positive note = I baked cupcakes yesterday and in each one I shoved a Lindt chocolate ball. :)

      C.

      xx

    8. Guest_322
      Guest_322 avatar
      1660 posts
      6 February 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

      Hi everyone,

      Ivan, the pit is awful. Like many others here, I've been in the dark pit too and it's a sad, lonely place.

      Chae, I hope your dr appointment went smoothly. You sound (understandably) worried about seeing him/her.

      I'm assuming you're talking about the menstrual cycle re: uterus comment ha, ha. Well, my mood plays up during that time although it's not related to bipolar (as I don't have bp). And those Lindt chocolate cupcakes sound delicious!

      But on a more serious note, you also sound like you're having a rough time. I think it's frustrating when you can't pinpoint a reason. Hopefully it eases up soon.

      Kaz, well, I'm sure your ironing marathon paid off today. Crisp clothes- nice! How did classes/work go today?

      Take care everyone.

      Dottie x

    9. velvetfaerie
      velvetfaerie avatar
      3698 posts
      7 February 2017 in reply to Guest_322

      Thanks Dottie

      the cupcakes are total calorie fest evil yummmmm

      Dr went well. She's great. Just waiting on text results.

      I'm not sleeping ATM even though I've taken something to help me sleep. Racing heart. The bf situation took a huge unexpected turn last night. I'm in shock. Total game changer.

      I'll explain later when I'm more together.

      Thanks for being there.

      xx

      1 person found this helpful
    10. Kazzl
      Champion Alumni
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      Kazzl avatar
      1873 posts
      7 February 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

      Morning folks

      Sorry to hear you're not sleeping Chae, that sucks. I hope you get some peace soon and the bf situation has changed for the better, one way or another.

      Hiya Dottie - thanks for asking about me hun. Work was excellent, but I came home absolutely exhausted, and with the head hamster in overdrive. I think I'm going to really enjoy it but getting back into the routine is going to take some getting used to.

      Hey Ivan - how are you today mate? Hope you're emerging from that pit.

      Hope everyone else is well and good.

      I think I'll be a bit steamrollered this week, so if I'm not around don't worry, I'll probably just be collapsed on the couch unable to string words together LOL. It's all good though.

      Love to all

      Kaz

      xx

      1 person found this helpful
    11. Guest_322
      Guest_322 avatar
      1660 posts
      8 February 2017 in reply to velvetfaerie

      Hi everyone,

      Chae, anytime.

      I'm glad you have a good dr on board. Waiting for test results can be nerve racking...

      Sleep deprivation is awful- it messes with our mind and body.

      The turn of bf events sounds completely unexpected. Head spin maybe.

      Kaz, I'm happy to hear work is going well although the hamster wheel sounds draining. No worries at all, you rest up and settle into your new routine at your own pace.

      Everyone else, I hope the week has been okay. I know some of you are having a hard time at the moment- thinking of you.

      Dottie x

      1 person found this helpful
    12. velvetfaerie
      velvetfaerie avatar
      3698 posts
      8 February 2017 in reply to Kazzl

      The steamroller found me too..... Just keep swimming right?

      Kaz - how'd the ironing go? Lol.... I'm allergic to it myself....

      uhoh I better go....... Running late argh!!!!!!

      ill return soon.....

      xx

      1 person found this helpful
    13. Lady_Stardust
      Lady_Stardust avatar
      127 posts
      8 February 2017

      Evening, everyone.

      Sounds like we're doing it tough recently - that really sucks. I hope the heaviness takes a hike ASAP for anyone experiencing it. Just remember that the winters can seem long and dark, but it'll always give way to spring, yeah? Echo velvetfaerie - just keep swimming. Not getting enough sleep is terrible; has anyone tried sleep relaxation clips on Youtube? I don't use them, but my mum swears by them. Maybe give those a go? And this is somewhat unrelated (but really, everything is related when it comes to the mind/body) but I hope everyone is getting enough water and eating healthily and regularly. Sometimes when the down mood makes an appearance, it's hard to find the strength to look after yourself, but it's so important. <3

      Guess what I did today? I had something of a pre-interview, where I met with a woman who acts as a middleman of sorts with a company I'm trying to get a job with, and she's going to help me with that! Hoping it leads to a job. I had to go to the doctor beforehand and my doctor was running late, so the nurse - seeing that I was borderline panic attack - got the patients ahead of me to agree to let me see the doctor first. That helped a lot in preventing a panic and I'm very grateful to the nurse/patients/doctor, who were really under no obligation to help me out in that way. (:

      1 person found this helpful
    14. velvetfaerie
      velvetfaerie avatar
      3698 posts
      8 February 2017 in reply to Lady_Stardust

      quick message from the train.....

      I have used the YouTube relaxation things. They are awesome!!! I forgot about them so thank you for reminder!!! I get daft when I'm having an episode.

      I'll keep you in my thoughts re the job prospect!! Gives me a happy focus ATM.

      I had a big panick attack too at dr Monday so my empathy ...

      xx

      1 person found this helpful

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