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Forums / Staying well / This bipolar life

Topic: This bipolar life

  1. SourceShield
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    951 posts
    9 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Hey Kaz!

    You sing???

    I love it.

    What styles and genre are you into singing?

    Thats so cool.

    I love to sing.

    I'm more a soul and rhythm and blues singer.

    Though, back when I worked as a performing artist, we did more cabaret style singing.

    I'm down to start a BB Band!.

    Cool stuff...

    I can also work the percussion instruments, and some tenor sax as well.

    By the sounds, you're quite the muso...

    Please tell me more!

    I like it...I like it a lot!.

    MuchLove

    Kaitoa

  2. Kazzl
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    10 December 2016 in reply to SourceShield

    Hiya Kaitoa - I am an ageing wannabe rock chick my friend. Rock classics from the 70s and 80s, though I also love soul and R&B 60s style. But basically I like anything as long as it's not crap.

    I used to play and sing a lot at uni (ummm, 30 years ago) with assorted friends in bands etc, but grown up life with kids and work etc put an end to that. These days I mainly do a lot of caraoke (singing in the car). My current car obsessions are the original version of Drift Away (can't remember the artist), a few Jimmy Barnes songs from his latest album, and couple of Tom Petty songs (Won't Back Down is my signature tune). My proper karaoke party piece is Born to be Wild haha.

    Until recently I sang in a blues and gospel choir (I'm a tenor) but I gave that up because I hated the repertoire (not much blues, lots of Jesus) and the choirmaster was a bit bossy.

    I'm not much of a muso as far as instruments go, I tend to get passionate then lose interest (that's a bipolar thing, so I've learned). I just entertain myself these days.

    A BB band sounds like a fine idea, even if it's just virtual (actually that's probably better haha). I love that you can do percussion Kaitoa, and sax! Baker Street it is then!

    Len and Mallow - what should we play? What do you like?

    Hope everyone has a good day today.

    Cheers

    Kaz

    xxx

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  3. SourceShield
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    10 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Morning Kaz,

    Oh man, you crack me up.

    I've told you before but I just love your sense of humour!

    That's a great signature tune, as well!.

    "Drift Away" - Dobie Gray! I love that song.

    I always sing Robbie Williams song, "Let Me Entertain You", as my karaoke opening song.

    Big song and it warms my vocals up.

    I reckon we have the makings of a fine band, with everyone's collective talents!

    Will wait to see what the rest of 'the band' have to say!.

    MuchLove

    Kaitoa

  4. Airies
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    11 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Hi Kazz, ms purple,mallow and Source shield,

    what a bunch of talented folk we are. Once there was BB King and now there's the BP's . I dabbled with clarinet in year 7. There wasn't much to choose from lol. Hey Kazz if you get a chance there's a great Tom Petty documentary on Net Flix , well worth watching and apart from the great music , he was a man of his principles. Great admiration for him and learnt so much. Mad Beatles fan here, love the Eagles, Fleetwood Mac and just about anything else. Having 2 older sisters I was exposed to a wide array of music. One was a mad Bay City Rollers fan, but we won't go there lol.

    when I'm being the domestic God nothing better then putting on YouTube hits from yesteryear. Apart from the bloody ad breaks I can turn it right up,sing along as I tear around. Mix it up a bit , last week Linda Ronstad kept me entertained for a few hours.

    ive had some very early nights this week. 3 and 4 o'clock I've popped my pills and hit the sack. 15 hours of sleep. Just bunkering down when need be.

    Yesterday walked for a few hours with my pooch, cycled for a hour and a half and gardened a wee bit. Overdid it, but an easier day today. Hard to believe Xmas around the corner. It's getting very busy,

    keep on practicing folks together we can make some beautiful music together

    cheers Len

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  5. Kazzl
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    11 December 2016 in reply to Airies

    Hiya Len - you are a man of good taste I see. I like all those bands too - and not BCR, blerghh. When I was in high school it was compulsory to like either BCR or ABBA. I was ABBA. You also had to choose between Sherbet and Skyhooks. (I was Skyhooks, of course.) Guess it was our country town, hat-and-blazer-convent-school version of gangs haha.

    I don't have Netflix unfortunately. I'd like to see the Tom Petty doco. Looove him. Really like the song he did with Stevie Nicks (Stop draggin' my heart around). Hey! A duet! Do you sing Len?

    I overdid it yesterday too my friend. Think I've mentioned how much I love the sun on my skin? Yes, well, too much of a good thing yesterday. Not real well last night. Long sleeves, big hat and shade today.

    Have a good day today mate. Blow that blues harp baby!

    Cheers

    Kaz

  6. Kazzl
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    11 December 2016 in reply to SourceShield

    Dobie Gray! Of course! Thanks Kaitoa

  7. SourceShield
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    11 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    That's all g!

    I'm listening to that song atm, actually.

    I was brought up on Roy Orbison from my grandad.

    Patsy Cline from my Nan.

    Bob Marley from the uncles, and disco from the aunties.

    We all lived in the family home together.

    It's amazing how music takes you right back....

    So it sounds like we already have our first song to jam?

    You and Igbran doing "Stop draggin my heart around".

    Great song choice.

    Do you think I could add a sax solo in there?

    Just to mix it all up, bring something new to it...

  8. Kazzl
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    12 December 2016 in reply to SourceShield

    Hiya Kaitoa - yep, I reckon we could have a sax solo in that song. No worries. Say, can I join you in Let Me Entertain You? Love that song! 'Gotta get high before you taste the lows', ooohh, been there, done that. 😄

    Sounds like you had a good musical upbringing. Love Roy Orbison, I mean, how could you not?

    How's everyone today? More glorious weather here. Hope it's good in your part of the world.

    Cheers all

    Kaz

    xxx

  9. SourceShield
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    12 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Hey Kaz!

    Awesome - I'll get me sax ready!.

    And, you singing on Let Me Entertain You...great idea!.

    let's do a Roy Orbison song as well.

    Which one do you think, or perhaps we could do a medley?

    Exciting stuff!.

    Peace

    Kaitoa

  10. Kazzl
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    12 December 2016 in reply to SourceShield

    Dream Lover. 😄 My fave. What's yours?

    This an eclectic repertoire we're getting here. May I throw some Cold Chisel into the mix? I reckon Mallow and Len would be into Cold Chisel. Or ABBA. Or ACDC. (Once did Long Way to the Top at karaoke. Good fun.)

    Kaz

    xxx

  11. SourceShield
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    12 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Hey Kaz,

    Firstly...if we're doing Cold Chisel, I wanna do "Forever Now" - that's my top fave of theirs to sing!.

    I've just put it on and listening to it now in fact.

    The Big O has so many wicked songs...

    In Dreams and Blue Bayou are my faves to sing.

    I'm keen to know what our other band members would like to do as well...

    MuchLove

    Kaitoa

  12. Kazzl
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    12 December 2016 in reply to SourceShield

    Forever Now gets a very big tick from me! Not sure about Blue Bayou, even though this is a virtual band I must admit my falsetto needs work. Ahhh what the hell, I'll give it a go!

    Cheers hun

    xx

  13. SourceShield
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    12 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl
    YAY!!!. :-)
  14. Guest_322
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    12 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Hi Kaz,

    Did someone say something about starting a virtual band???!!!

    Now, I don't have bipolar personally and I have no insight or words of wisdom to offer (keeping any potential expectations of me low here ha, ha) but you had me at "music" and "band!"

    Do you need a pianist? I'm classically trained and can read sheet music. So even though I'm not exactly familiar with some of the songs you mentioned, just chuck the notes at me and I can sight read 😊

    Or do I need to audition?

    Dottie x

  15. Kazzl
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    12 December 2016 in reply to Guest_322

    Wooo hooo Dottie! You and your piano are so very welcome to join the band. We are not disorderist here (just disorderly) so bipolar's not essential. Anyways, we can teach you that bit if you want to be. LOL. No, don't even think about it.

    Wow, this opens up even bigger possibilities for the repertoire! What would you like to play Dottie?

    You know guys, we're gonna need a name soon ... suggestions welcome.

    xxxx

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  16. MsPurple
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    12 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Thanks Kazz for your reply on the previous page. Makes me feel a bit better. My biggest fear is knowing I will definately have a lifelong illness. I guess with GAD there is some chance it can go away (or be insignificant) however bipolar doesn't seem the same (my mum has been told she will need meds her whole life). The meds would be the scary part as it seems more brutal. Most of the meds seem to cause weight gain. I have gained some on my new meds but I have remained stable and I am getting fitter and stronger as I go to the gym most days, so my lack of weight loss could be due to muscle building. But I have low compliance with meds that make me gain weight greater than 5kg (which my current one made me gain 4kg, but I'm on higher dose. Probably will be able to go down once I find a good GP up here and discuss it with them). Also I think I would struggle to treat the highs and that scares me a bit

    Thanks for your help again :)

  17. Guest_322
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    12 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Thanks Kaz!!! I appreciate the warm welcome and that you're not, uh, disorderist ha, ha.

    I feel honoured to join BB's first virtual band 😊 I'm pretty open minded about different music genres as it's all about the feels for me.

    Let's see...Florence, Sia...or what about Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody or Phantom of the Opera? There are many more...

    But of course I'm happy to play any of the songs that you mentioned earlier too!

    Dottie xxx

  18. Guest_322
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    12 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Hi Kaz,

    Oh yes, we need a band name...nothing comes to mind yet ha, ha. We'll think of something, I'm sure.

    Dottie x

  19. Kazzl
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    13 December 2016 in reply to MsPurple

    Hi MsPurple, you're very welcome.

    I understand your fear about it being lifelong - yes it is and I will probably be on medication for life. That rocked me when I was diagnosed - until then any time I had a depressive episode I clung to the thought that maybe this was the last time, maybe there wouldn't be any more. Now I know there will be and that's not easy to accept.

    For some reason I find it easier to think of it as a chronic illness rather than a 'mental' condition - say like lupus or diabetes or celiac disease. I wonder if that way of thinking might help your mum? Physical chronic illnesses don't carry the stigma, and bipolar is a physical illness of the brain. We need medication (in many cases) or other ongoing treatment, there's no cure and we need to take good care of ourselves, as is the case for people with physical chronic illnesses.

    One thing I'd suggest to you hun is that you be very alert to the effects of stress on you as you go through life. I wasn't of course because I didn't know anything, and I walked blindly into (or often created) major stress situations time and time again, and the effects piled up until I cracked.

    It's only now, looking back knowing I'm bipolar that I can see patterns in my thinking and my behaviours - I put myself through so much, same triggers, same reactions, battling toxic people, resorting to booze as a coping mechanism, always willing to take on the world, never learning from one situation to the next, never having the good sense to stay out of the fray so to speak.

    You are well informed and aware, with your family history. I'm not saying limit yourself or your experiences, but do take notice of how things affect you and protect and care for yourself along the way. A good way to be regardless.

    Cheers

    Kaz

    xx

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  20. Kazzl
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    13 December 2016 in reply to Guest_322

    Hiya Dottie - Bohemian Rhapsody! Wooaa. Yeah! Hey Kaitoa, how's your soprano mate? No way I can get the high notes, but I can do the rest haha. Yes to Florence too. I'm probably the only person in the world that hasn't heard Sia. Phantom is beyond me I think but it would suit Kaitoa. I'll play triangle through it.

    So, with a pianist on board I reckon there's also plenty of Elton John or Billy Joel we could do. Say, if we did Piano Man, Len could do the harmonica! AND he has a cool hat!

    Now there's another issue - what to wear! I'll need to buy some new shoes ... sparkly blue boots I reckon.

    Cheers hun

    Kaz

    xxx

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  21. SourceShield
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    13 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Hello Lovelies,

    Our band is coming along splendidly!

    In real life - I'm a baritone-tenor...more baritone now if anything but in cyber-land sure I can sing anything!

    So, soprano for Bohemian Rhapsody...too easy!

    Love Billy Joel...my fave is - You May Be Right...I May Be Crazy (story of my life).

    I have sung some Phantom before for a cabaret show...we are a very eclectic band, aren't we?

    ...if we're getting new boots, I want blue sparkly ones too please ala Bowie in his Glam Rock period!.

    I will get me saxophone all cleaned up and ready for our first jam session...mega-fun!!!.

    How's everyone else goin?

    MuchJoy

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  22. Guest_322
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    14 December 2016 in reply to SourceShield

    Hi Kaz and Kaitoa,

    You'll both rock your blue boots! Very colour coordinated.

    Sounds great! I'm open to your Elton John and Billy Joel suggestions, Kaz. If I have the sheet music then I can sight read and it's all sweet.

    Yay, you'll get to showcase your hidden soprano talents Kaitoa! Warm up your voice and sax 😊

    Dottie x

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  23. SourceShield
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    14 December 2016 in reply to Guest_322

    Nice one Dottie...Champion!!!.

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  24. Ellu
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    14 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Dear Kazzl and others,

    I am new to this bi-polar thead so I hope you don't mind me butting in. I have had bi-polar disorder for 47 years (since I was 15) and my life has been a series of ups and downs. When I am really depressed I can't get out of bed - I usually end up in hospital. My highs are not too bad, but they make me wound up and stressed and I have problems living a regular life. At the moment I am well but soooo tired! I asked my doctor today and he says that chronic fatigue for up to several months is common after an episode. He recommends trying to stick to a routine in life - going to bed and getting up at the same times, and working through a daily routine to keep things under control.

    I just wanted to say to you all that despite my bi-polar I have managed to have a career, and 4 children who are now in their 20's. The bi-polar never goes away completely, but it is possible to work around it and lead a fulfilling life. We musn't lose hope, we are all unique individuals with worthwhile qualities we can share.

    Best wishes to everyone,

    Ellu

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  25. SourceShield
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    14 December 2016 in reply to Ellu

    MuchLove Ellu!.

    PeaceOut

    Kaitoa

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  26. Kazzl
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    14 December 2016 in reply to Ellu

    Hi Ellu! I've seen you around the threads and I'm so glad you've joined us here! (Thanks Kaitoa for making Ellu welcome.)

    You are absolutely spot on when you say it never goes away but we can work around it and lead fulfilling lives. That's such a good attitude and it's true and something we must hold on to during the bad times.

    For me, acceptance hasn't been easy. I was diagnosed early this year after being treated for a long time for depression. The hypomanic aspects were masked for many years by drinking - I self-medicated with booze and put my bad, mad behaviour down to that (I've now been sober for 5 years). And, of course, when I felt elated and wildly enthusiastic and generally 'high', I thought that was how life was supposed to be. Couldn't understand why other people didn't agree with me or think the way I did or wanted to do what I wanted.

    Then I started cycling rapidly, over a period of months, and, well, diagnosis.

    I'm now at a point where I'm stable and mostly well, and I've accepted it. In fact, I guess, I've embraced it and become committed to helping other people with serious disorders, especially bipolar.

    You know, what your doctor said about fatigue is really interesting. I've not heard that before but it makes sense. I have bipolar 2 so I'm milder than many people, but I also experience fatigue, and often depression, after a big up. I'm prone to crashing straight after an up (although I think that's improving with medication and less stress in my life). I can certainly understand how people with much more severe episodes might take months to recover.

    Like you Ellu, I have had a career and raised a family (daughters aged 30 and 27). I'm trying to start a new career now in mental health and will be studying for basic qualifications next year with the aim of becoming a support worker.

    We certainly must not lose hope hun. There's much to be hopeful about! And, while we know the episodes might come and go for the rest of our lives, we also know that we can get through them and live and enjoy the bits in between.

    Very best wishes to you Ellu

    Kaz

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  27. Ellu
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    16 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    Dear Kazzl,

    Thank you for inviting me onto this thread. It sounds like a real community of friendly people, people who understand what it is all about! I have had bi-polar disorder for 47 years and am currently well. I am afraid I don't play any musical instruments, but I did use to sing in a choir - maybe I could do backup vocals! I like Baroque music, but I also like reggae, rock steady, bluegrass and Cajun. Plus of course I like all those tunes from the 70's when I was at uni. and we used to sit around listening to music all night! My two nephews are both professional musicians, but I am afraid the musical gene passed me by...

    Hello to you all, hope you don'tmind me joining your discussion. I don't know any other people with bi-polar, so I am happy to meet you all.

    Ellu

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  28. Kazzl
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    16 December 2016 in reply to Ellu

    Hi Ellu - great to see you! Another singer, woo hoo!

    Y'know they say that bipolar folks are often creative, and there's quite a few famous creative types - musicians, actor, artists - who have bipolar. We're special haha.

    Serious matter - do you and our other bipolar buddies here experience anger (of the explosive variety) as part of the condition? I was reading a blog I like yesterday and the writer mentioned that many people do (I sure do) but that it's not included as a symptom of bipolar in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) which is the official clinical standard for diagnosing and classifying mental health conditions (from the US but used internationally).

    Most people responding to the blog said they felt explosive anger was symptomatic, and I've always considered it the 'bad' up, ie angry not elated, hypomania​.

    What do others think?

    What's prompted this is this morning, in a matter of seconds, I went from a perfectly happy normal mood to screaming and swearing, wanting to smash my phone and computer and yell at the bank when something that should have been an easy process wouldn't work. Fortunately my hubby, who knows my behaviour well, intervened. It'll probably take me the rest of the day to come down now.

    Am I just a cranky bugger, or do others experience this?

    By the way Ellu - if you're interested in the blog, google Natasha Tracy, Bipolar Burble.​

    Love

    Kaz

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  29. SourceShield
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    16 December 2016 in reply to Kazzl

    MuchLove Kaz!

    Are you okay now?

    Peace

    Kaitoa

  30. SourceShield
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    16 December 2016 in reply to Ellu

    Hi Ellu!

    I love reggae music too!

    Also love bluegrass and cajun...I'm listening to Elmore James on Youtube as I type!

    ...Elmore James - The King Of Slide...

    The more singers for our band the merrier, in my opinion.

    Glad to have you here with us.

    MuchLove

    Kaitoa

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