Hello Zodiax, and a warm welcome to the site.
What you have told us, is I'm sure, a familiar story for a lot of us, however, it still doesn't stop the pain you have to go through and I'm very sorry that you have had to experience this for yourself.
It's not easy for people to open up, firstly because that's not how they were raised or secondly because they fear of what sort of reaction they will receive or what type of rejection will be offered, and unfortunately, when you try to end your life, then people finally take notice.
Those family/friends old or new who realise that you have a problem will approach you and know that they want to help you and will remain with you, not only now and through your struggle but well after as well.
Can I suggest as I do mention to other people, that you start writing a list of how you are feeling, and I say this because down the track something might have been forgotten and not worrying now, but it has been a trigger before and could possibly come back to annoy.all of us have had to suffer from our own type of depression and understand how you are feeling.
We hope to hear back from you.