Hi TonyWK and others
Around 10 years ago I learned about the longest longitudinal study done by Harvard University following a group of Graduates, now for over 80 years.
The study BEGAN in the Great Depression.
You can google ted talks - harvard university longest longitudinal study to hear about it.
There is a talk of over 1 hour on this also plus lots to read on this.
My take away from learning about this study is this. Crap happens no matter what your view is (I guess this is up for debate also from an individual POV lol)... but it makes the WORLD of difference in HOW you look at these crises in life or life changes or situation. And WHAT you do as a result of these events / times.
Still only my take away from it.... the people who had a more positive view had better health, better relationships with family and friends and a longer life.
Better health.... wow hey. I'm well into my 7th decade on earth and only been in hospital to have babies lol.
I was a born optimist. I had a terrible childhood but it was my never give up ATTITUDE that saw me through.
I KNOW I'm realistic - my evidence is achieving degrees against enormous hardship, battling through many Courts recently with the important outcomes I wanted, raising children on my own and they're doing remarkably well considering.
You can certainly be realistic AND an optimist. I am. Realism isn't exclusive to pessimists only lol.
I see it as a spectrum.... negative view to the left and optimism to the right.
Being realistic covers both views along the spectrum TO A POINT at each end.
It stops at the point of suicidal and losing complete touch with reality on the left, it stops at the point of delusional, losing complete touch with reality to the right. This is my view only and not endorsed by anyone else. Doesn't need to be. Though I'm happy to alter my POV along the way.
The thing to know in life is that NO ONE on earth gets a "free path", regardless of your outlook. Stuff happens. Obstacles. Issues. Hardship. Events.
It's up to each of us in how we deal with them.