Thank you for finding the strength to post about your struggle, and the start of some success, in our forum.
It is good that you are under the care of a mental health team. We understand that body and brain chemistry is quite different between people, so different medications often have affect people differently. This is the case whether we are looking at mental health medication, or physical health medication, so it is well understood that people experience meds in different ways.
We would like to encourage you to try and remember that healing takes time. And, even more importantly, healing takes different lengths of time depending on each person's individual physical, mental, and emotional make-up. So, please try to be patient and understanding with yourself.