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Forums / Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition (carers) / How to help my depressed partner? Please help.

Topic: How to help my depressed partner? Please help.

3 posts, 0 answered
  1. Hatim
    Hatim avatar
    1 posts
    12 August 2020
    So, to understand the situation I guess I should give a bit of context. My partner (woman) and I have been together for a few months now. I have always known that she did have issues with depression and anxiety, but not the extent of it. Recently she has been getting into these moods where all she wants to do is nothing, feel nothing, and simply not exist. Upon asking her, what is it that would help her feel better? All she says is that she simply wants to feel nothing at all. I'll admit that although I am aware of mental health and how important it is to take care of oneself, I often find myself not knowing what to say to her. Anything I say seems to anger her and make even more upset. A few weeks ago she began seeing a therapist, which is great, but she often tells me that she doesn't want to process anything or work on the issues that the therapist and she discussed and just get to a point where she feels nothing at all, no happiness, sadness, anger, love, fear, nothing. I do not understand how to help her, because anything I say triggers her and makes her more sad. I want to help her, but I don't know how.
    Any advice would be really great! Thank you

    Stay safe <3 />H
  2. Sophie_M
    Community Moderator
    • Works for beyondblue moderating these forums
    Sophie_M avatar
    5937 posts
    12 August 2020 in reply to Hatim

    Hi Hatim,

    Welcome to the forums. We're so grateful that you've reached out here today, we know that it is not an easy thing to do, but it is so important that you have. We're really sorry to hear what your partner is going through at the moment, but she sounds very lucky to have such a caring partner like yourself. Please know that you've come to a safe space to talk about these thoughts and feelings and our wonderful community is here to offer as much support and advice as you need.  

    If you feel up to it, we'd also recommend getting in touch with our Support Service which is available 24/7 on 1300 22 4636 or you can visit on our website www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport for online chat. One of our friendly counsellors will be able to give you some information and advice to help you and your partner.   

    You might also find some helpful advice on our page "Talking to someone you're worried about" https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/have-the-conversation/talking-to-someone-you-are-worried-about

    We hope that you keep checking back in with us to let us know how you are going, whenever you feel up to it.

  3. CalmCat
    Champion Alumni
    • Community champion volunteers who are not currently active on the forums.
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    CalmCat avatar
    354 posts
    16 August 2020 in reply to Hatim

    Hi Hatim,

    Thanks for such a raw and open first post.

    Firstly, what an amazing partner you must be, prioritizing your loved ones metal health.

    All you can do is what your doing right now, being listing, learning and growing with her on her mental health journey. Encourage her to see a mental health worker. And I'm sure with the right mental health worker and your love she will heal.

    Let us know how your going.

    Regards,

    Doz

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