I know the title sounds kind of weird but hear me out. Long story short, my mother lives quite far from us so that prevents me from being there for her and giving support in certain ways. Her emotional situation as I understand (via my half-brother that lives with her) is that she is very depressed and her and my stepdad fight really bad and really often. they have 4 kids, youngest being 9 so for her it is out of the question to leave. The main issue is she has been struggling with depression and anxiety I think her whole adult life, she hasn't had a job since she had me and I'm 25... She also doesn't drive because she doesn't have anyone who can help her learn in the right way (as this also gives her intense anxiety). I would really like to help her find a job, but she is so disadvantaged and fragile. She probably would take anything but also she has been very isolated and I think the easier to get customer service jobs would really overwhelm her and not be great for her mental health.

Does anyone have any advice for me on what to do? is there any services that might help her? What jobs might be useful? I also struggle with anxiety and depression and feel so incredibly overwhelmed by this

Hello Dear Shanay,

A very warm and caring welcome to the forums...

I’m sorry your mother is struggling with depression and anxiety...

I also have depression and anxiety, and found it extremely hard to get out of my house because of it....

My support team years ago mentioned volunteer work, and after a while I gave it a try, it helped me to learn to be a bit more trusting of people and how to interact with them again....

I wonder if your mum would be open to trying a few hours a day as a volunteer in a charity shop for a start...I do understand that what works for one doesn’t work for others, but thought I would mention to you...

My kindest thoughts dear Shanay..

Grandy..

Hi Shanay_V,

Thank you for sharing and welcome to the forums!

I am sorry to hear about your situation. It is really difficult when your parents live far away, because you can't help them the way that you want to. The fact that you made this post shows that you really care.

I think it may be beneficial for your mum to possibly speak with a GP and psychologist. In the meantime, a job may be a great outlet for her. Without being able to drive, and being at home with four children, it would be hard to take some time for herself. I would recommend jobs in the disability sector. Some of the jobs on sites such as Mable or Hireup are very simple (going for a walk), they can be in her area and she can pick and choose which job she prefers. This is just an option and as it is one-on-one it may assist her anxiety. It is also really rewarding.

Just an option, would love to hear from you x