Hi there Prudence
Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you for providing your post.
Wow, a difficult situation indeed and for your partner to lose his daughter and still so recently, I couldn’t imagine the pain and torment he is going through.
From all that you’ve written, you’ve been doing a wonderful job at trying to make sure he is ‘ok’ and the love you have for him shines through strongly in your post.
Now as awful as this sounds, he is right. He believes it’s never going to get better – that belief is pretty much true, IF the person will not seek out help, support. It’s just too hard to deal with on your own.
BUT and here’s a good but, I think – I read where you mentioned that he has made an appointment for next week to go see a doctor or counsellor. I hope he stays true to his word and DOES go and then the other thing I really hope for, is that the gp that he’s seeing is a positive experience for him. If they take on board all he has to say and treat him in a professional and serious way, then this hopefully could be the start of a healing process/journey.
And another thought on this – I would imagine that he wouldn’t want you to attend this appointment with him. Perhaps you could go to a similar appointment to that gp at a later date to ask for coping mechanisms, helping options that they may be able to advise. Also on this site, I’m sure there’s literature that you can click on with regard to supporting options for your partner.
Might close for now, but do hope you can write back again.