Hello ruralite, I have a lot of questions from your post. Before I ask them, I'll start by saying it's important to have a good relationship with your doctor. You need to be able to have mutual trust, disclose everything, so they can provide you with the best treatment. You also need to be confident in their advice so you will follow it, as there's no point in going to see a doctor if you're going to ignore what they tell you.
So my questions - why is it an issue that your doctor is a woman? You have called her a bully, and have mentioned that you felt a PTSD episode triggered off by seeing her, but you don't really explain why. Would have felt berated if a male doctor had given you the same advice? If you are managing your condition so well by yourself, why did you need to see a doctor in the first place? Could it be that the doctor berated you because your self-management techniques are potentially harmful to your health?
Sorry ruralite there is a lot I don't know from reading your post, so didn't think it was a good idea to jump to conclusions about what might have happened when you saw your doctor. As I said at the start, you need to be able to trust your doctor and feel comfortable listening to their advice. If you don't, then regardless of the reasons, it is best to move on.