I’m really sorry this has happened to you. It sounds like you’re having a really tough time and being incredibly brave in trying to do the right thing by getting help. Please don’t let your experience so far discourage you, because it doesn’t sound right at all.
‘Romantic Thief is right, being able to see a psychologist is precisely the point of having a GP mental health plan. It allows you to access 10 sessions each year with a psychologist.
Finding a GP that is knowledgeable and confident in dealing with mental health issues can be quite hard to come by. Is this a doctor you see regularly, and have a good relationship with? I know from my own experience that finding a GP that you feel comfortable with regarding your mental health is so important and I’ve found a great GP who listens to me and will do all she can to help. Also, if your GP will be managing your medication, you want someone knowledgeable and you can trust. Could you consider finding a new GP? Perhaps one who family/friends recommend?
You are being really responsible in wanting to see a therapist, good one :) Regarding seeking a diagnosis, there is nothing at all wrong with that. It’s up to you to decide what path you want to take in your mental health journey. And if you think finding a diagnosis will help you understand yourself, what you need and what treatment is best for you, go for it. I know for me, getting my diagnoses absolutely helped me to get the help I need (correct medication and therapy) as well as let me understand myself better. It lets me see early warning signs, understand when I need help and feel less frightened by what happens to me. And it really helped with my self esteem so that I wasn’t always so hard on myself.
Please, please, please don’t let this experience stop you getting help. In my experience, the goal of being in a psychiatric hospital is to focus on stabilising you when you’re in a crisis state, so that you’re well enough to go back into the community. It’s mostly about treating the immediate symptoms to keep you safe. But that’s just the beginning of the journey to getting well. You are absolutely doing the right thing in seeking continuing help. This is when you learn about your illness, learn skills, get supported, and also work on finding the right medication for you (if that’s what you need/want).
Please writeback here if you need anything. It’s a great community here and I will keep an eye on this thread.