Hello Tee, there might be different degrees to how people are trying to cope with their mental illness, but as soon as you compare yourself to somebody else who doesn't suffer from it, then we are all in the same boat.
Those that don't understand or comprehend what this illness can do to us, has little knowledge of the strength and the power as it takes control of us, is clearly a problem we all have to face, unfortunately.
We aren't and can not be the person we once were, simply because along the way, that's what has caused us to break down, and if we do try and resurrect ourselves from the past, then there's every chance you may not get any better and then affect your relationship.
The same applies if your partner becomes cranky then how are you supposed to get better, very difficult, if not impossible.
Can I suggest you read the many comments that have been posted, just to make you feel as though you aren't alone, and we would definitely hope to hear back from you.