Hi all, I suffer from a stress related illness that appear to be post traumatic stress disorder. I live in rural Victoria and have had little help from the medical profession. A counseller from the Vietnam Veterans Councilling said, if I am having problems I HAVE to say something as bottling it up will only do further damage.

The thing thats currently creating an issue is I cannot stand much stress, if I cannot control this an attack will occur,often producing serious anxiety and sometimes depression, its unpredictable though.

Currently in my life there is a number of small issues which are all adding up.

I am currently quite unfit after a long illness and I am starting a fitness program, but I have been unable to contact my trainer.

I no longer drive due not being able to sleep well, this I am sure is a fitness issue, the above is an attempt to cure it. So Iam using amobilty scooter, this is showing some small signs of unreliabilty and I do not have much faith in its technical support staff.

I like to build items, the above mentioned counsiller from the VVCS, stated this was real good therapy, I am having a small problem getting some parts though.

By themselves none of these are serious, combined though they are pushing me down, I lived in hell for years and I have no intention to ever return there. I am sick of living with the mental pain, but I have sworn in the begining this would NEVER defeat me. That makes it just that much harder to hang, but hang on I will.

Just writing this has been helpfull, I will be interested to see the responses. I do know though I am not alone, there being plenty in excatly the same boat.

Bye the way, my handle MB518D is the model number of a 137 litre V20 3500BHP diesel engine made by Daimler Benz and used during and a bit after the 2nd world war.

Hi MB518D's,

Welcome to Beyond Blue and to the community here. Thanks for sharing your story and also for explaining what your handle represents. "Doolhof" is actually Dutch for Puzzle or Maze. When I first wrote in I felt like my life was a total puzzle and I was wandering around in a maze not knowing which way to go!

You have mentioned quite a few little issues that are getting you down. I suffer from depression, Borderline Personality Disorder and stress, so I can understand feeling totally overwhelmed at times.

Hopefully you will find ways to get over the obstacles. I agree with the counsellor, it does help immensely to share and talk about your issues. Keep trying to phone the people you need to talk with to get things resolved. I know it can be a hassle and that it is tiring when you can't get the answers you need.

Sometimes when I don't feel like I am in control of a situation I struggle with that as well. Some days just one more thing is enough to tip me over the edge. For me being in the garden is a huge calming experience.

Have you ever tried the phone help lines? There is one here at Beyond Blue or you could use LifeLine.

Are there different Drs. whom you can see in your area? We moved to the country three years ago. It took me a while to find a Dr who understood depression from my perspective. He has been so very helpful, I am thankful I was able to find such a wonderful Dr.

Beyond Blue also have a list of Drs who understand depression and mental health issues. I am not sure if you might be able to find one in your region.

Are there any Men's Sheds in your region? If so, then you might be able to connect with someone there who may be able to help you source the bits and pieces you need for your building projects.

I do hope you can find some solutions to your concerns. I try to achieve one thing at a time and that helps me feel less overwhelmed!

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools