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Topic: Hello

9 posts, 0 answered
  1. Sommer
    Sommer avatar
    7 posts
    2 August 2021
    Hi, i am new here and feeling like i just needed to chat. A lot of things going on in my mind and hoping to connect and maybe seek the help i need. Thank you
  2. Ggrand
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Ggrand avatar
    8790 posts
    2 August 2021 in reply to Sommer

    Hello Dear Sommer,

    Can I give you a very warm and caring welcome to our forums...

    It’s really very nice to meet you and were very pleased that you have taken a great first step in join our wonderful community..

    We are here to support you as best we can...Is their something that is going on in your life that you would like to share with us...no pressure at all...Just as little or as much as you feel comfortable sharing...These forums are safe and non judgmental....

    Hoping to hear from you, when your ready...We are listening..

    My kindest thoughts dear Sommer....

    Grandy...

  3. Sommer
    Sommer avatar
    7 posts
    2 August 2021 in reply to Ggrand

    Hello Grandy,

    Thank you for the reply, your kind words brought tears to my eyes, you are so kind. I am feeling very down today, its probably the cliche of boyfriend trouble, i have been with this guy for 7.5 yrs and i honestly do not think he sees me as a worthy partner or cares for me the way i wish. One day he loves me and then the next he is a different person, acts differently, can ignore me. I find it frustrating as i know deep down he knows i am a caring wonderful person who wants the best for him but for some reason chooses to treat me like i am nothing.

  4. Ggrand
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Ggrand avatar
    8790 posts
    2 August 2021 in reply to Sommer

    Hello Dear Sommer,

    I am sorry your boyfriend doesn’t treat you the way he should...

    Im wondering if you have sat down with your bf and talked to him about the way he makes you feel...Is this something that you could do with him?...maybe he isn’t aware of your feelings..sometimes over a long period of time together, partners can get very used to the other person who like you show so much love and care and take you for granted...maybe couples counselling?...

    Please lovely lady...you deserve a person who treats you with love and kindness 24/7...I’m not much good with partner problems, I married a man who expected me to treat him with respect, care and do everything that he wanted and often..gave me the silent treatment for weeks even months...I was treated like I was their exclusively to pamper all his needs...my needs never mattered at all...

    I feel that the most important thing in any relationship is honesty, love, care , kindness and respect for each other...I know you love him...by your words...You deserve the same love and respect from him...

    You need to care for yourself first, you are very important and it’s sad that your partner is making you feel so down..that’s so not right...

    You need to ask yourself, if he won’t sit down and talk to you or go to couples counselling....Do you want to live your life in a relationship that makes you feel sad not respected, unloved and not appreciated....because beautiful Sommer you are worth so much more then that....

    Has he been treating you the way he has been for the entire relationship or is this something that has just recently been happening?...

    My kindest thoughts with a gentle warm hug precious lady..

    Grandy..

  5. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    918 posts
    2 August 2021 in reply to Sommer

    Hi Sommer,

    Wellcome to our forums!

    we are to chat to you and support you 😊

    Sorry you are having boyfriend trouble that’s not nice, I believe our partners should always treat us with love and respect if they don’t we need to bring it up with them so they can become aware of there actions….

    Have you spoken to your boyfriend about the way you are feeling?

  6. Sophie_M
    Community Moderator
    • Works for beyondblue moderating these forums
    Sophie_M avatar
    5483 posts
    2 August 2021 in reply to Sommer

    Hey Sommer,

    We're so sorry to hear you're facing uncertainty in your relationship and feeling down. It's an incredibly stressful thing to go through, especially when the relationship is as long as 7.5 years.

    If you ever want to talk to someone on the phone, you can always call us on 1300 22 4636. You could also call Relationships Australia on 1300 364 277. It can be really helpful to talk things like this through, and to make sure you don't feel alone in dealing with something distressing.

    We're really glad you found the forum, and have had the bravery and openness to share how you're feeling here. As Grandy says, it's a safe and supportive place, and we hope you find some comfort and understanding in this community of kind people. 

    Kind regards, 

    Sophie M 

  7. Sommer
    Sommer avatar
    7 posts
    3 August 2021 in reply to Ggrand

    Thank you for replying. I guess when i think of it he has really changed in the last 6 months, he becomes one person when he is with a mate, he acts differently to when we are alone. When we are on our own he is loving, caring, amazing guy i fell in love with but then acts horribly with others. I am starting to realise that he is never going to change and when i do talk to him about how we are or i am feeling, he replies with "don't stress nothings wrong". So yeah i really dont think he has any idea. I honestly, which sounds really sad, believe he knows how i feel but he knows i am loyal and wouldn't do anything like leaving, which is where he may be in for a shock i guess.

    I am so sorry to hear you weren't treated lovely either, you definitely deserved better as well. I hope you are doing much better now and are in a loving relationship.

    :)

  8. Sommer
    Sommer avatar
    7 posts
    3 August 2021 in reply to Petal22

    Hello,

    Thank you for taking the time to talk, yes i have spoken to him but i honestly thinks that everything is ok and that i will never do anything crazy like leaving him. He knows how good he has it and he just does things without tinking at all, he gets himeself into situations that will come back to haunt him and its quite frustrating. With talking to you all, i am really starting to realise that i do deserve better.

  9. Sommer
    Sommer avatar
    7 posts
    3 August 2021 in reply to Sophie_M

    Hi Sophie,

    Thank you for replying. Its very hard to stop loving someone after that period of time and it hasn't all been bad. Its changed in like 2 weeks, he is just a different person. I hadn't heard of Relationships Australia so i might give them a call, thank you for that.

    Thank you!

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