I'm a mother seeking advice on ways to understand, support and help my youngest son, aged 21, who has anxiety and depression. The difficulties are that he is a CLAM, and won't open up to my husband and me; he is creative and very clever and studying at Uni but his degree's face to face hours are not demanding and he doesn't have to exert himself to get by; by nature he is STUBBORN and a bit lazy (I'm not making that up, stubbornness runs in the family and I'm a bit lazy myself and have to fight it).
He is also stuck in the logbook of his parents' faults and things which we did (he won't tell us what they are). I'm not being down on him, most kids have a logbook like this, in fact I did, but I know that it's not a source of happiness.
His mental health is firstly genetic and secondly situational.
I just find it very hard to be friendly and affectionate when he's being a selfish 21 year old male, especially when he flips in the red herring of he's not feeling well.
I know it's harder for him to do stuff but there is an element of just normal poor attitude.
He also appears to think we are just providers of beer and wifi.
He has a gaming addiction, and recently has been spending more time on this. He would easily spend at least 5 hours a day gaming. I realize this is also a form of socialising but it's also an escape mechanism.
He has a girlfriend but he doesn't socialise with friends and finds family gatherings hard. They are bigger and noisier than normal, with 10 adults and 10 grandchildren 9 and under.
Sense my frustration? I need someone to acknowledge that it's hard for family members in a situation like this.